If At First You Don’t Succeed, Try, Try Again. Then Quit. There’s No Use Being a Damn Fool About It

W. C. Fields? Stephen Leacock? Justin J. Burns? Henry Morgan? George Burns? Anonymous? Dear Quote Investigator: A well-known saying about persistence has become an energyless cliché: If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again. The following parody version is usually attributed to the famous comedian W. C. Fields: If at first you don’t succeed, …