See the Happy Moron

Dorothy Parker? James Webb Young? Owen H. Hott? Anonymous? Dear Quote Investigator: A friend and I recently wondered about the origin of the following poem. We did not have much luck tracking it: See the happy moron, He doesn’t give a damn, I wish I were a moron, My God! perhaps I am! There is …

A Collision at Sea Can Ruin Your Entire Day

Thucydides? W. B. ‘Bill’ Hayler? Horowitz’ First Law? Dear Quote Investigator: I once served on a ship that had a brass plaque on the bridge engraved with the following: A collision at sea can ruin your whole day. This comes across as a modern sardonic saying, and I was surprised to read the name of …

“How Old Cary Grant?” “Old Cary Grant Fine, How You?”

Cary Grant? Gar Wood? Mark Clark? Tom Ferris? Dear Quote Investigator: I love the movies from the golden age of Hollywood. I think the stars were more glamorous in the past, and the stories about the stars were wittier. The quotation I would like you to investigate was reportedly written by Cary Grant for a …