Jesse Carr? Margaret Thatcher? Anonymous?
Question for Quote Investigator: Positive self-descriptions are sometimes inaccurate. Here are three versions of a saying which illustrates this insight:
(1) Power is like being a lady—if you have to tell them you are, you ain’t.
(2) Being powerful is like being a lady. If you have to tell people you are, you ain’t.
(3) Being powerful is like being a lady. If you have to tell people you are, you aren’t.
In this context, the term “lady” means a woman of refinement or superior social status. This remark has been attributed to U.S. labor union leader Jesse Carr and U.K. Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher. Would you please explore the provenance of this saying?
Reply from Quote Investigator: The earliest match found by QI appeared in the “Fairbanks Daily News-Miner” of Fairbanks, Alaska in October 1975. The words were attributed to Jesse Carr, but the quotation was indirect. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:1
A friend of Jesse L. Carr says the Teamster leader has a saying that goes, “Power is like being a lady—if you have to tell them you are, you ain’t.”
The next earliest citation known to QI appeared in “Newsweek” magazine in September 1976. The statement was presented as a direct quotation from Carr at the beginning of an article about the labor leader:2
“Being powerful is like being a lady. If you have to tell people you are, you ain’t …
— Jesse Carr, head of Teamsters Union Local 959, Anchorage
Based on the citations listed above, QI believes that Jesse Carr deserves credit for this remark. The version in “Newsweek” is probably the most accurate. Margaret Thatcher received credit by 1984, but the saying was already in circulation. Also, QI has not found any citation displaying a direct quotation from Thatcher.
Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.
In 1980 “The Quotable Quotations Book” compiled by Alec Lewis contained the following entry:3
Being powerful is like being a lady. If you have to tell people you are, you ain’t.
JESSE CARR, quoted in Newsweek, Sept. 27, 1976
Also, in 1980 the compilation “Loose Talk: The Book of Quotes from the Pages of Rolling Stone Magazine” contained this entry:4
“Being powerful is like being a lady. If you have to tell people you are, you ain’t.”
JESSE CARR, HEAD OF ANCHORAGE TEAMSTERS’ UNION, 1976
In 1984 “The Official MBA Handbook of Great Business Quotations” compiled by Jim Fisk and Robert Barron linked the saying to Margaret Thatcher without a supporting citation:5
Being powerful is like being a lady. If you have to tell people you are, you aren’t.
— Attributed to Margaret Thatcher
In July 1984 a columnist in Sacramento, California reviewed the compilation immediately above and reprinted the quotation attributed to Thatcher:6
British Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher tells us that “Being powerful is like being a lady. If you have to tell people you are, you aren’t.”
In 1987, newspaper editor Mike Sanborn crafted a variant statement using a shorter template:7
By the way, it does not necessarily follow that owners of classy cars are classy. I’ve seen one Cadillac in town that has a personalized license plate that reads “CLASS.” If you must tell people you have class, you don’t.
In 1988 a piece about coaching published in a newspaper in Aberdeen, Scotland credited Thatcher with a variant using the word “successful”:8
Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher, whatever you might think of her personally or politically, is tough and, for me, she summed things up when she said in a radio interview ‘To be successful is like being a lady. If you have to tell people you are, you aren’t’.
In 2007 the compilation “Women Know Everything! 3,241 Quips, Quotes & Brilliant Remarks” included the following entry:9
Being powerful is like being a lady. If you have to tell people you are, you aren’t.
-MARGARET THATCHER (1925-)
FIRST FEMALE BRITISH PRIME MINISTER
In conclusion, QI believes that Jesse Carr deserves credit for this statement based on the citations in 1975 and 1976. The version in “Newsweek” is preferable because Carr was interviewed, and the quotation was ascribed directly to him. The evidence linking the quotation to Margaret Thatcher occurred later and was weaker.
Image Notes: The Political Lady (L’Ambitieuse) painted by James Tissot circa 1885. The image has been cropped and resized.
Acknowledgement: Great thanks to Mark F. Crist whose inquiry led QI to formulate this question and perform this exploration. Crist pointed to the “Newsweek” citation and suggested that Jesse Carr was the originator.
- 1975 October 25, Fairbanks Daily News-Miner, Jesse Carr: trucker to Teamster Boss by Craig Smith (Staff Writer), Quote Page 2, Column 1, Fairbanks, Alaska. (Newspapers_com) ↩︎
- 1976 September 27, Newsweek, The Strongman of Alaska by Tom Nicholson and Peter S. Greenberg, Quote Page 77, Column 1, Newsweek Inc., Livingston, New Jersey. (Verified with scans) ↩︎
- 1980, The Quotable Quotations Book, Compiled by Alec Lewis, Topic: Power, Quote Page 208, Thomas Y. Crowell, New York. (Verified on paper) ↩︎
- 1980, Loose Talk: The Book of Quotes from the Pages of Rolling Stone Magazine, Compiled by Linda Botts, Quote Page 172, Quick Fox / Rolling Stone Press, New York. (Verified with scans) ↩︎
- 1984 Copyright, The Official MBA Handbook of Great Business Quotations, Selected by Jim Fisk and Robert Barron, Topic 2: Power, Quote Page 18, A Fireside Book: Simon & Schuster, New York. (Verified with scans) ↩︎
- 1984 July 3, The Sacramento Bee, Help for business people who’d like to appear witty, profound by Bill Bucy, Quote Page AA7, Column 4, Sacramento, California. (Newspapers_com) ↩︎
- 1987 June 5, The Rapid City Journal, Luxury car lover, vows not to waver from his Lincoln by Mike Sanborn (Assistant City Editor), Quote Page B1, Column 2, Rapid City, South Dakota. (Newspapers_com) ↩︎
- 1988 March 4, Aberdeen Press and Journal, Scotland’s tales of the unexpected, Quote Page 24, Column 8, Aberdeenshire, Scotland. (British Newspaper Archive) ↩︎
- 2007 Copyright, Women Know Everything! 3,241 Quips, Quotes & Brilliant Remarks by Karen Weekes, Section: Behavior, Quote Page 49, Quirk Books, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. (Verified with scans) ↩︎