Quote Investigator® – Tracing Quotations

Quip Origin: Blessed Are the Cracked for They Shall Let in the Light

Groucho Marx? Spike Milligan? Lydia Augusta Arsens? Tramp Starr? Dr. Parr? John Conolly? John Stuart Blackie? Tom Chalmers? Anonymous?

Question for Quote Investigator: The word “cracked” has several slang meanings. The traditional slang meaning is crazy, foolish, or eccentric. Here are three versions of a comical saying which uses wordplay:

(1) You’ve got to be cracked to let the light in.
(2) Blessed are the cracked, for they shall let in the light.
(3) They were certainly cracked: but the crack let in light.

This quip has been attributed to Irish comedian Spike Milligan, Canadian politician Lydia Augusta Arsens, U.S comedian Groucho Marx, pseudonymous humorist Tramp Starr, Scottish classical scholar John Stuart Blackie, and others. Would you please explore this topic?

Reply from Quote Investigator: The earliest match found by QI appeared in an 1830 book titled “An Inquiry Concerning the Indications of Insanity” by John Conolly, Professor of Medicine at the University of London. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:¹

Every county presents one or more specimens of individuals who are reputed scientific by those more ignorant of science than themselves; eccentric men, whose wandering attention has travelled over every subject … in the opinion of their neighbours, they become accounted “wonderfully clever men, but certainly a little mad.” The learned and benevolent Dr. Parr used to say of such men, that they were certainly cracked: but that the crack let in light;—and even then, it is to be feared, he estimated them too highly.

Dr. Parr probably corresponded to English scholar Samuel Parr who died in 1825. Parr is currently the leading candidate for coiner of this quip.

In 1841 English surgeon Walter Cooper Dendy published “The Philosophy of Mystery” which included a student character named Astrophel. This character credited the quip to Samuel Parr:²

But say, if there be (in vulgar words) a crack in this cranium of mine, may not this crack, as saith the learned Samuel Parr, “let in the light?”

If prophetic visions in the early ages came over the dying, why not in ours?

Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.

Quote Origin: Growing Old Is Mandatory. Growing Up Is Optional

Gary Wright? Maurice Lutkin? Herb Caen? Chili Davis? Bumper Sticker? Anonymous?

**Silhouette image of an old person and a young person from Unsplash**

Question for Quote Investigator: Aging is an unavoidable part of the human experience, but it is not necessary to become staid and boring. Here is a pertinent saying:

Growing old is mandatory. Growing up is optional.

Would you please explore the provenance of this remark?

Reply from Quote Investigator: The earliest match found by QI appeared in “The Courier-Gazette” in McKinney, Texas in January 1986. The saying appeared in a piece called “Publisher’s Scratchpad” by someone using the initials JS, but the attribution was anonymous. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:¹

Wish we’d been wise enough to come up with this one:
“Growing old is mandatory. Growing up is optional.”

Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.

Quote Origin: The World Market for Copiers Will Never Exceed 5,000 Units

Arthur D. Little Consulting Firm? JoAnne Yates? John H. Dessauer? Ian H. Gordon? Horace Becker? JoAnne Yates? Apocryphal?

**Illustration of a cat sitting on a photocopier**

Question for Quote Investigator: Predicting the demand for an innovative product is remarkably difficult. Apparently, the company that invented the photocopier hired a prestigious consulting firm to estimate future sales. The result was a statement like the following:

The total market for photocopiers is at most five thousand units.

I do not know the exact phrasing of the statement. Also, I do not know the precise number of units. Would you please explore this topic?

Reply from Quote Investigator: Chemical engineer John H. Dessauer helped develop xerography and worked for the Haloid Company, which later became Xerox Corporation. In his 1971 book, “My Years with Xerox: The Billions Nobody Wanted,” Dessauer discussed a survey that sought to forecast demand for photocopiers. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:¹

Haloid was still sponsoring a series of market surveys, for which it retained reputable New York firms. One of them, after questioning vast numbers of businessmen, reported that we could not look forward to placing more than five thousand copiers in American offices! It presented all sorts of evidence to bolster its dire warning. If its estimate was accurate, there was no hope whatever of recovering our investment in xerography. We might as well forget producing a copier and accept our loss.

Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.

Quip Origin: It Is Impossible To Make Anything Foolproof Because Fools Are So Ingenious

Douglas Adams? J. R. Williams? Bill Vaughan? Ron Burns? Anonymous?

Question for Quote Investigator: There is a family of comical sayings which highlight the paradoxical intelligence of fools and idiots:

(1) Nothing is foolproof. Fools are entirely too ingenious.
(2) They’re not idiot-proof because idiots are so damned inventive.

English humorist Douglas Adams employed this quip, but I do not know whether he coined it. Would you please explore the history of this joke?

Reply from Quote Investigator: This joke is difficult to trace because it can be expressed in numerous ways. Below is an overview with dates and attributions:

1934 May 21: Answering affirmative … “Is it possible to build a fool-proof highway?” … he has no idea of the ingenuity of the fools (Anonymous)

1934 Jul 12: Inventors make things … fool-proof, but they do not take into account the marvelous ingenuity of fools (Anonymous)

1942 Nov 04: “Like to see things … absolutely foolproof” “You never will, because as th’ fool foolers get more brilliant th’ fools get more brilliant too” (Canadian cartoonist J. R. Williams)

1946 Apr 01: The trouble with so-called fool-proof devices is that they usually underestimate the number and ingenuity of fools (Anonymous)

1949 Jan 11: Nothing is fool-proof. Fools are entirely too ingenious. (McFadyen’s Streamlines)

1957 July 07: They underestimate the fools who think there is any such thing as fool-proof inspection (Anonymous)

1961 Aug 05: All these fool-proof gadgets underestimate the fools (Anonymous)

1966 May 27: Safety enthusiasts who envision a fool-proof automobile underestimate us fools (Bill Vaughan)

1973 Mar 02: It is impossible to make anything foolproof because fools are so ingenious (Anonymous)

1979 Apr 21: It is impossible to make the ballot papers idiot proof because idiots are so incredibly ingenious (Bernard Goodsall)

1992: Mistake … trying to design something completely foolproof … underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools (Douglas Adams)

1993: You can’t make anything idiot proof because idiots are so ingenious (Attributed to Ron Burns)

1997 Jun 29: Nothing is fool-proof to a sufficiently talented fool (Anonymous bumper sticker)

2002 Aug 25: They’re not idiot-proof because idiots are so damned inventive (Jerry Fortburger)

Below are details for selected citations in chronological order.

Saying Origin: You Can’t Live With Them, and You Can’t Live Without Them

Henry Ward Beecher? William James? Upton Sinclair? Peggy Hopkins Joyce? Metellus Numidicus? Frederick Reynolds? John Dryden? Robert Bell? Della E. Stewart? Anonymous?

**Silhouette of a couple sitting back-to-back**

Question for Quote Investigator: Maintaining relationships is difficult. One must accommodate the needs and desires of people who are sometimes confusing, annoying, and ungrateful. Yet, these complex human connections produce happiness and fulfillment. Here are two versions of a pertinent saying:

(1) You can’t live with ’em, and you can’t live without ’em.
(2) We cannot live with them; we cannot live without them.

Would you please explore the provenance of this saying?

Reply from Quote Investigator: QI has found instances in this family of statements which refer to women, men, neighbors, wives, wicked people, and Irish people. The saying is difficult to trace because it can be expressed in numerous ways. Below is an overview with dates and attributions, beginning with partial matches.

177 AD Precursor: Set quoniam ita natura tradidit, ut nec cum illis satis commode, nec sine illis ullo modo vivi possit (English translation from Latin: We can neither live very comfortably with them nor at all without them) (Remark about wives attributed to ancient Roman statesman Metellus Numidicus by Roman writer Aulus Gellius)

1624 Precursor: We can neither live with them without inconvenience, nor without them at all (Remark about wives attributed to Metellus Numidicus by English writer Thomas Heywood)

1709 Precursor: But since we cannot live without ’em; Take ’em with all their Faults about ’em (Remark about women by an anonymous person; later incorrectly attributed to French poet Jean de La Fontaine)

1797 Precursor: That, let us rail at women, scorn, and flout them, We may live with, but cannot live without them (Remark about women from playwright Frederick Reynolds in “The Will: A Comedy”)

1875 Dec 15 Precursor: He was converted, and instead of “We can’t live with them,” it was, “We can’t live without them” (Remark about black customers by George S. Paine)

1882 May 09: We can’t live with them and we can’t live without them (Remark about Irish people attributed to clergyman Henry Ward Beecher)

1883 Oct 22: We can’t live without them or with them (Remark about Irish people attributed to clergyman Henry Ward Beecher)

1885 Jun 24: We cannot live happily with our wives, yet we cannot live happily without them (Remark about wives attributed to Metullus (Metellus Numidicus))

1887 Jun: Though in a general way he cannot live without them, yet, as regards certain individuals, it often falls out that he cannot live with them either (Remark about humans living in tribes by psychologist William James)

1888: You cannot live without them, but you ought not to live with them, nor seek their society (Remark about “the wicked” by Father John Crasset)

1892 Mar 18: We cannot live with them and we cannot live without them (Remark about women by Adiel Sherwood)

1905: You can’t live with them, and you can’t live without them (Remark about wives in a humor book compiled by Harry L. Newton)

1920 Mar 09: We cannot live without them, but how hard we sometimes find it to live with them! (Remark about men by columnist Della E. Stewart)

1926 Jun 30: Neighbors! we can’t live with them, and we can’t live without them (Remark about neighbors by Mary Caroline Davies)

1927: You can’t live with ’em and you can’t live without ’em, and what sort of a mess is it? (Remark about sex in the novel “Oil” by Upton Sinclair)

1930 Mar 02: You can’t live with them, and you can’t live without them! (Remark about men by Peggy Hopkins Joyce)

Below are details for selected citations in chronological order.

Adage Origin: Quacks Are the Greatest Liars in the World, Except Their Patients

Benjamin Franklin? Benjamin Rush? Doctor Thibou? David Pitcairn? William Wadd? George G. Sigmond? Anonymous?

**Items used to care for medical patients from Unsplash**

Question for Quote Investigator: Charlatans who provide fraudulent medical advice and dubious nostrums have afflicted humankind for centuries. Misguided patients often boost these deceivers the most. Here are two versions of a pertinent saying:

(1) There are no greater liars than quacks, except for their patients.
(2) Quacks are the greatest liars in the world, except their patients.

This saying has been attributed to U.S. statesman Benjamin Franklin, U.S. physician Benjamin Rush, and Scottish physician David Pitcairn. Would you please explore this topic?

Reply from Quote Investigator: A conversation about quacks between Benjamin Rush, Benjamin Franklin, and Doctor Thibou was described in a diary entry written by Rush which was dated September 22, 1788. The saying under examination was mentioned, but the attribution was anonymous. The word “liars” was spelled “lyers”. The term “physic” meant the practice of medicine or healing. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:¹

Waited upon Dr. Franklin with Doctor Thibou, of Antigua. The Dr. said few but quacks ever made money by physic, & that no bill drawn upon the credulity of the people of London by quacks, was ever protested. He ascribed the success of quacks partly to patients extolling the efficacy of the remedies they took from them, rather than confess their ignorance & credulity, hence it was justly said, “quacks were the greatest lyers in the world, except their patients.”

Rush’s 1788 diary entry appeared in “The Pennsylvania Magazine of History and Biography” in 1905 within an article titled “Excerpts from the Papers of Dr. Benjamin Rush”. QI believes that this diary entry is credible; however, QI has not yet seen scans of the handwritten diary entry.

The passage is ambiguous. The “Dr.” in the second sentence might refer to Franklin or Thibou. Thus, the adage about quacks may have been spoken by Franklin or Thibou. There is a third possibility; the saying might have already been known to Rush, and he simply added it to the diary entry because it fit the context. Nevertheless, the adage is usually linked to Benjamin Franklin. Interestingly, the prefatory phrase “it was justly said” signaled that the attribution was anonymous.

Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.

Quote Origin: The Most Common Way People Give Up Their Power Is by Thinking They Don’t Have Any

Alice Walker? Rhona Raskins? William Martin? Apocryphal?

**Group of people in silhouette from Unsplash**

Question for Quote Investigator: People have more power than they believe, but they must be willing to exercise it if they wish to achieve their goals. Here is a pertinent saying:

The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don’t have any.

This statement has been attributed to U.S. novelist and poet Alice Walker, but I have never seen a precise citation. Would you please explore this topic?

Reply from Quote Investigator: The earliest match found by QI appeared in a syndicated column written by Canadian clinical counselor Rhona Raskins in December 1999. The quotation appeared at the beginning of the column:

Quote of the Day: The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don’t have any.
Alice Walker

The column appeared in Canadian newspapers such as “The Edmonton Sun” of Edmonton, Alberta¹ and the “Times Colonist” of Victoria, British Columbia.² Unfortunately, Raskins did not state where she obtained this quotation. QI has not yet found a citation for a book, essay, interview, or speech by Alice Walker containing this quotation.

Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.

Quote Origin: I Think There Is a World Market for About Five Computers

Thomas J. Watson Sr.? Thomas J. Watson Jr.? Howard H. Aiken? Harold Bergstein? J. Presper Eckert? John Mauchly? Chris Morgan? David Langford? Apocryphal?

**ENIAC (Electronic Numerical Integrator and Computer)**

Question for Quote Investigator: Collections of boneheaded predictions are popular with people who enjoy laughter combined with commiseration or superiority.

Computers were extraordinarily expensive in the 1950s. First-generation machines used vacuum tubes which were fragile and unreliable. The leader of IBM supposedly said:

I think there is a world market for about five computers.

I have been unable to find a solid citation for this attribution. Would you please explore his topic?

Reply from Quote Investigator: The notion that the market for early computers would be strictly capped has been linked to several pioneers in the development and commercialization of computers.

Thomas J. Watson Sr. was the President of IBM in 1924. He remained the leader until a transition period began in 1952 when Thomas J. Watson Jr. became the President of IBM. In 1956 Watson Sr. died and Watson Jr. became CEO. Watson Jr. continued as the leader up to 1971. He died in 1993.

Researchers have been unable to find substantive evidence supporting the attribution to either man. IBM corporation received many inquiries about this topic and performed a search in corporate documents.

IBM determined that Thomas J. Watson Jr. discussed a forthcoming computer model called the 701 Electronic Data Processing Machine during an annual meeting in 1953. A team of salespeople and Watson Jr. visited potential customers, and Watson Jr. stated, “… we expected to get orders for five machines, we came home with orders for 18”.

The German magazine “Der Spiegel” published a piece about computers in 1965. While discussing Thomas J. Watson Jr. and the demand for these massive machines the magazine wrote, “Watson estimated the US economy’s need at no more than five.”

Howard H. Aiken was the main designer of IBM’s Harvard Mark I, one of the earliest general-purpose electromechanical computers. The Mark I began operating in 1945. There is evidence that Aiken believed that very few computers were needed based on the 1944 citation given further below.

J. Presper Eckert and John Mauchly designed ENIAC, the first general-purpose electronic digital computer which was completed in 1945. The duo discussed the saying during a 1962 interview in the magazine “Datamation” which is covered further below.

Here is an overview displaying dates, excerpts, and attributions.

Quote Origin: All True Stories End in Death

Ernest Hemingway? Lionel Trilling? Ladislaus Boros? Larry Williams? Apocryphal?

**Painting “Sleep and His Half Brother Death” by John William Waterhouse**

Question for Quote Investigator: U.S. novelist Ernest Hemingway has been credited with the following fatalistic remark:

All true stories end in death.

I have been unable to find this precise statement in Hemingway’s oeuvre. Apparently, he employed a different phrasing. Would you please help me find the correct statement together with a citation?

Reply from Quote Investigator: In 1932 Ernest Hemingway published “Death in the Afternoon” which examined Spanish bullfighting. Hemingway discussed the mating of bulls and cows. He suggested that a bull which refused to mate with multiple cows would be sent to the bullring which meant death. A woman suggested that this topic was sad. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:¹

I find that a sad story, sir.
Madame, all stories, if continued far enough, end in death, and he is no true-story teller who would keep that from you. Especially do all stories of monogamy end in death, and your man who is monogamous while he often lives most happily, dies in the most lonely fashion. There is no lonelier man in death, except the suicide, than that man who has lived many years with a good wife and then outlived her. If two people love each other there can be no happy end to it.

Over time, Hemingway’s quotation has been streamlined to yield the concise version. Here is an overview of this saying together with variants, dates, and attributions:

1932: Madame, all stories, if continued far enough, end in death (Ernest Hemingway)

1954: All stories end in death (Attributed to Ernest Hemingway)

1965: The best love-stories end in death (Ladislaus Boros — translated from German to English)

1966: All stories end in death (Attributed to Ernest Hemingway)

1967: All great love stories end in death (Lionel Trilling)

1971 Nov: Every true story ends in death (Attributed to Ernest Hemingway)

1971 Dec: All true stories end in death (Attributed to Ernest Hemingway)

2001: All true stories end in death (Attributed to Ernest Hemingway)

Below are details for selected citations in chronological order.

Quote Origin: It Ain’t Bragging If You Can Do It

Dizzy Dean? Muhammad Ali? Sonny Liston? Reggie Jackson? Babe Ruth? Anonymous?

**Picture of a baseball stadium from Unsplash**

Question for Quote Investigator: Unfounded boasts are criticized, but an individual who sets and accomplishes an audacious goal can win praise. Here are three versions of a pertinent saying:

(1) It ain’t bragging if you can do it.
(2) It ain’t bragging when you can do it.
(3) It ain’t bragging if it’s true.

This saying has been attributed to three baseball players: Dizzy Dean. Reggie Jackson, and Babe Ruth. It has also been credited to two boxers: Muhammad Ali and Sonny Liston. Would you please explore this topic?

Reply from Quote Investigator: U.S. professional baseball pitcher Jay Hanna Dean was known by his nickname Dizzy Dean. In 1934 he published an article in several newspapers which discussed bragging. Dean communicated the central idea of the saying, but he employed a different phrasing:¹

There’s one thing about us Deans. Some people think we do a lot of bragging, but we don’t figure it’s bragging. When we say we’re good we say it because we believe it down in our hearts and I—I kinda think you could get a pretty good argument out of Mickey Cochrane if you tried to tell him that we weren’t so hot as pitchers.

What I started to say, though, was that we don’t brag. Whenever we say we’re going to do something we go out and do it.

Dizzy Dean’s extraordinary pitching performance helped his team, the St. Louis Cardinals, win the National League pennant and the World Series in 1934. QI believes that Dean’s essay was condensed and paraphrased over time to yield the sayings attributed to Dean. Below is an overview showing the evolution of the phrase together with dates and attributions.

1934: We don’t brag. Whenever we say we’re going to do something we go out and do it. (Dizzy Dean)

1935: It’s not bragging when a fellow can back up anything he says. (Attributed to Dizzy Dean)

1943: If I can do what I say, it ain’t bragging, is it? (Attributed to Dizzy Dean)

1951: It ain’t bragging when you can back it up. (Attributed to Dizzy Dean)

1958: It ain’t bragging when you can do it. (Attributed to Dizzy Dean)

1959: It ain’t bragging if you can do it! (Attributed to Dizzy Dean)

1962: It ain’t bragging if you can do it. (Anonymous “old adage”)

1966: It ain’t bragging when you done done it. (Attributed to Dizzy Dean)

1968: If I tell the truth. It sounds like bragging. And if I don’t, I’m lying. (Sonny Liston)

1973: It ain’t bragging if you can do it. (Attributed to Muhammad Ali)

1974: It ain’t bragging if it’s true. (Attributed to Dizzy Dean)

1976: If you do it, it ain’t bragging. (A profound philosopher)

1990: It ain’t bragging when you can do it. (Attributed to Reggie Jackson)

1994: It ain’t bragging if you can do it. (Attributed to Babe Ruth)

2007: It’s not bragging if you can back it up. (Attributed to Muhammad Ali)

Below are details for selected citations in chronological order.