Quote Origin: If You Want To Be a Grocer, or a General, or a Politician, or a Judge, You Will Invariably Become It; That Is Your Punishment

Oscar Wilde? Stephen Fry? Apocryphal?

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Question for Quote Investigator: The following remark about selecting a career is comically acerbic:

If you want to be a grocer, or a general, or a politician, or a judge, you will invariably become it; that is your punishment.

The statement above has been attributed to the famous Irish playwright and wit Oscar Wilde, but I am skeptical. There is a second part to the remark which comments on an artistic life:

If you live what some might call the dynamic life, but i will call the artistic life, if each day you are unsure of who you are and what you know, you will never become anything, and that is your reward.

Would you please explore the provenance of these statements?

Reply from Quote Investigator: These statements were spoken by the popular English actor and broadcaster Stephen Fry in 2010. Fry attributed the words to Oscar Wilde, but QI believes that Fry was really presenting a rough paraphrase and interpretation of a passage written by Wilde in his essay/letter titled “De Profundis” which was composed while Wilde was in prison in 1897.

“De Profundis” was published posthumously in 1905. Boldface added to excerpts by QI. The term “gaol” is an alternative spelling of “jail”:1

People point to Reading Gaol and say, ‘That is where the artistic life leads a man.’ Well, it might lead to worse places. The more mechanical people to whom life is a shrewd speculation depending on a careful calculation of ways and means, always know where they are going, and go there.

They start with the ideal desire of being the parish beadle, and in whatever sphere they are placed they succeed in being the parish beadle and no more.

A man whose desire is to be something separate from himself, to be a member of Parliament, or a successful grocer, or a prominent solicitor, or a judge, or something equally tedious, invariably succeeds in being what he wants to be. That is his punishment. Those who want a mask have to wear it.

But with the dynamic forces of life, and those in whom those dynamic forces become incarnate, it is different. People whose desire is solely for self-realization never know where they are going. They can’t know.

In one sense of the word it is of course necessary , as the Greek oracle said, to know oneself : that is the first achievement of knowledge. But to recognise that the soul of a man is unknowable, is the ultimate achievement of wisdom . . .

I hope to live long enough and to produce work of such a character that I shall be able at the end of my days to say, ‘Yes! this is just where the artistic life leads a man!’

Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.

In 2010 Stephen Fry delivered a humorous monologue at the Sydney Opera House in Australia.2 Afterwards Jennifer Byrne interviewed him, and he attributed a lengthy quotation to Oscar Wilde:3

Wilde said, “If you want to be a grocer, or a general, or a politician, or a judge you will invariably become it that is your punishment. If you never know what you want to be, if you live what some might call the dynamic life, but i will call the artistic life, if each day you are unsure of who you are and what you know; you will never become anything, and that is your reward.”

QI conjectures that Fry’s remarks were based on the passage from “De Profundis” presented at the beginning of this article.

In 2011 an x-tweet from @MusicVidsILike credited Wilde with a statement spoken by Fry:4

If you want to be a grocer, or a general, or a politician, or a judge, you will invariably become it; that is your punishment. (Oscar Wilde)

In 2014 the book “These Things I’m Telling You: Little Stories, Big Meaning” by Leigh McRae began with the following epigraph:5

If you want to be a grocer, a general, a politician, or a judge, you will invariably become it; that is your punishment. If you never know what you want to be, if you live what some might call the dynamic life but I will call the artistic life, if each day you are unsure of who you are and what you know, you will never become anything, and that is your reward.
—Oscar Wilde

In conclusion, Oscar Wilde deserves credit for the passage he wrote in “De Profundis” published in 1905. In 2010 Stephen Fry attributed a quotation to Oscar Wilde which QI has not found in the works of Wilde. However, QI hypothesizes that Fry was presenting his interpretation of the passage in “De Profundis.”

Image Notes: Avatars representing professions from OpenClips on Pixabay. Images have been rearranged and resized.

Acknowledgement: Great thanks to shantanunikam whose inquiry led QI to formulate this question and perform this exploration. Also, thanks to fivelethalscrews of the subreddit answers who pointed to the passage in “De Profundis”.

  1. 1905, De Profundis by Oscar Wilde, Second Edition, Quote Page 118 to 120, Methuen and Company, London. (HathiTrust Full View) link ↩︎
  2. Website: IMDb (Internet Movie Database), Webpage title: Stephen Fry Live at the Sydney Opera House, Show description: In his first and only Australian appearance, Stephen Fry comes to Sydney Opera House to discuss travel, art, TV, madness and everything in between, Year of Show: 2010, Length of Show: 1 hour 30 minutes, Stars: Stephen Fry and Jennifer Byrne, Director: Michael Hines. (Accessed imdb.com on July 7, 2024) link ↩︎
  3. YouTube video, Title: Stephen Fry, Sydney Opera House (2010), Uploaded on September 17, 2021, Uploaded by: duckonawall, (Quotation starts at 1 hour 24 minutes 32 seconds of 1 hour 28 minutes 11 seconds) (Description: Video shows Stephen Fry at the Sydney Opera House in Australia. Fry’s monologue performance was followed by an interview conducted by Jennifer Byrne) (Accessed on youtube.com on July 7, 2024) link ↩︎
  4. X-Tweet, From: BC News and videos @MusicVidsILike, Timestamp: 10:51 PM – Jul 26, 2011, Text: If you want to be a grocer, or a general… (Accessed on x.com on July 11, 2024) link ↩︎
  5. 2014, These Things I’m Telling You: Little Stories, Big Meaning by Leigh McRae, (Book Epigraph), Quote Page vi, Balboa Press: A Division of Hay House, Bloomington, Indiana. (Google Books Preview) ↩︎
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