You Are the Average of the Five People You Spend the Most Time With

Will Smith? Jim Rohn? Tim Ferriss? Jack Canfield? Janet Switzer? Daniel G. Amen? Loral Langemeier? Keith Cunningham? Ty Talcott? Scott Elliott? Paula Owens? Anonymous?

Dear Quote Investigator: You are deeply influenced by the actions and behaviors of your friends and companions. You consciously and unconsciously imitate what you perceive in your local environment. The following adage encapsulates this viewpoint. Here are four versions:

(1) You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.
(2) Your life is going to be a reflection of the five people that you spend the most time with.
(3) You are the sum of the five people you spend the most time with.
(4) We become the combined average of the five people we hang around the most.

Would you please explore the provenance of this saying?

Quote Investigator: The earliest close match located by QI appeared in the 2005 book “The Success Principles” by Jack Canfield with Janet Switzer. Canfield is best known for co-creating the best-selling self-help series “Chicken Soup for the Soul”. The saying appeared as a chapter epigraph crediting entrepreneur and motivational author Jim Rohn. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:^[1]2007 (2005 Copyright), The Success Principles by Jack Canfield with Janet Switzer, Principle 25: Drop Out of the “Ain’t It Awful” Club…and Surround Yourself with Successful People, … Continue reading

You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.
JIM ROHN
Self-made millionaire and successful author

The statement attributed to Rohn followed a circuitous route:

When Tim Ferriss was 12 years old, an unidentified caller left the above Jim Rohn quote on his answering machine. It changed his life forever. For days, he couldn’t get the idea out of his mind. At only 12 years of age, Tim recognized that the kids he was hanging out with were not the ones he wanted influencing his future.

Thus, a lengthy chain produced the attribution. Canfield learned of the saying from Ferriss who heard the saying from an unidentified person who credited Rohn.

Tim Ferriss was born in 1977, and he is best known for the self-help book “The 4-Hour Workweek”. Ferriss heard the quotation circa 1989 when he was 12 years old. QI tentatively credits Rohn with the saying although the current evidence is weak, and QI believes the saying evolved over time.

Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.

The central idea of the saying under examination can be expressed in many ways. An instance appeared in the 17th century Spanish novel “Don Quixote” by Miguel de Cervantes. The notion was spoken by Sancho Panza who was the faithful servant and squire of the main character Don Quixote. Here is an English rendition:^[2]1749, The Life and Exploits of the Ingenious Gentleman Don Quixote de la Mancha by Miguel de Cervantes Saavedra, Translated by Charles Jarvis, Volume 2, Second Edition, Quote Page 134 and 135, … Continue reading

Here, quoth Sancho, the proverb hits right, Tell me your company, and I will tell you what you are.

A separate Quote Investigator article about the saying immediately above is available here.

In 1989 Daniel G. Amen M.D. published an article titled “How To Get Out of Your Own Way” in the widely distributed newspaper supplement “Parade Magazine”. Amen discussed the impact of companions on mindset:^[3] 1989 September 24, Boston Sunday Globe, Section: Parade Magazine, How To Get Out of Your Own Way by Daniel G. Amen M.D., Start Page 8, Quote Page 8 and 9, Boston, Massachusetts. (Newspapers_com)

Who are the five people you spend the most time with? Which category do they fit into?

If the world around you is negative, chances are you are too. On the other hand, if you surround yourself with positive, uplifting people, you’ll notice an almost immediate rise in your spirits. Don’t forget, you can choose the people with whom you spend your time.

Amen’s remarks were a precursor to the statement attributed to Rohn. Amen used the key phrase “five people” and described the influence of ones coterie.

In 2001 Loral Langemeier wrote a chapter in the book “Wise Women Speak: 20 Ways to Turn Stumbling Blocks into Stepping Stones”. Langemeier also used the key term “five people”:^[4]2001, Wise Women Speak: 20 Ways to Turn Stumbling Blocks into Stepping Stones, Compiled by Fern Carness, Chapter: Choices of the Financially Free by Loral Langemeier, Quote Page 217, Carness Health … Continue reading

List the five people you spend the most time with. Are these people on a similar financial path? If they are not, find five others who are doing and living the way you want.

In 2002 Amen published “Healing the Hardware of the Soul”, and he reiterated the point from his 1989 article in “Parade”:^[5] 2002, Healing the Hardware of the Soul by Daniel G. Amen M.D., Chapter 13: Soul to Soul, Quote Page 214 and 215, Free Press: A Division of Simon & Schuster, New York. (Verified with scans)

Are you surrounded by people who believe in you, people who encourage you to feel good about yourself? Or do you spend time with people who are constantly putting you down and downplaying your ideas? Who are the five people you spend the most time with? Are they positive or negative?

In 2005 Ty Talcott and Scott Elliott published “The Metanoia Factor: Controlling Destiny”. They employed a variant saying about income with an anonymous attribution:^[6]2005, The Metanoia Factor: Controlling Destiny, Edited by Ty Talcott and Scott Elliott, Chapter: Metanoia Factor 2: The way to have what you want is by “asking the right question”!, Quote Page … Continue reading

It’s been stated that your income will become the average of the five people you spend the most time with. We therefore surround ourselves with wealthy people and those who wish to become wealthy. The Inner Circle is powerful and available to all who are serious about developing a higher consciousness and more enjoyable standard of living.

Also, in 2005 Canfield’s book used the quotation as a chapter epigraph which he credited to Jim Rohn as mentioned previously:

You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.
JIM ROHN
Self-made millionaire and successful author

In 2006 Gudjon Bergmann published “The Seven Human Needs: A Practical Guide To Finding Harmony and Balance in Everyday Life”. He used the saying, but he was uncertain of the attribution:^[7]2006 Copyright, The Seven Human Needs: A Practical Guide To Finding Harmony and Balance in Everyday Life by Gudjon Bergmann, Chapter: The 3rd Need – The Need for Individual Strength, Quote Page … Continue reading

One quote I heard recently says: “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with,” (I heard this from Keith Cunningham but the original source is unknown to me). Choosing your friends is not an easy thing to do. You may have to limit relations to people you care deeply for because of their negative attitude towards life.

In June 2006 Andrew Hewitt and Luc D’Abadie published an article in the “Telegraph Herald” of Dubuque, Iowa containing a variant expression about prediction:^[8] 2006 June 21, Telegraph Herald, Is College a Risky Investment? by Andrew Hewitt and Luc D’Abadie, Quote Page C1, Dubuque, Iowa. (NewsBank Access World News)

The best way to predict your future is to envision the future of the five people you spend the most time with. Who are these five people in your life? Do they share your values and support your dreams? Will they be where you want to be 10 years from now? Through your college years you will consciously or unconsciously develop a core group of friends.

In July 2006 actor Will Smith used a version of the saying within a speech he delivered in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania:^[9] 2006 July 24, Philadelphia Daily News, Amid Glamour & Glitz, The Point Was Hope by Jenice Armstrong, Start Page 8, Quote Page 9, Column 3, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. (Newspapers_com)

“Your life is going to be a reflection of the five people that you spend the most time with,” Smith pointed out. “It’s who you are.”

“If you don’t want it to be these five people [around you now] then you’ve got to hang with five new people. We will rise and fall based upon the people that you have around you.”

In November 2006 satirist Joe Queenan of “Barron’s” magazine visited the Learning Annex Real Estate & Wealth Expo held in Manhattan. Queenan employed a variant with “sum” instead of “average”. He suggested that the statement was trite:^[10] 2006 November 27, Barron’s, Volume 86, Number 48, Hey, What Did You Expect for a Lousy $99? by Joe Queenan, Start Page 44, Quote Page 44, New York. (ProQuest)

Attendees seem to revel in the ceaseless flow of canned banalities: . . . “If you play with pennies, you get back pennies”; “To a starving man, a carrot feels like a banquet.” It is as if these incantations are the secret texts that must ceaselessly be invoked, otherwise everyone might forget that we are the sum of the five people we spend the most time with. Or is it 12? Or 76?

In 2008 holistic nutritionist Paula Owens published the self-help book “The Power of 4”, and she employed the variant with “sum”:^[11]2008, The Power of 4: your ultimate guide guaranteed to change your body and transform your life by Paula Owens, Chapter 1-2, Quote Page 15, Published by Paula Owens at paulaowens.com. (Verified with … Continue reading

Surround yourself with like-minded individuals who make you feel good when you’re with them. You are the sum of the five people you spend the most time with. Does this buddy, role model or expert enhance the quality of your life?

In 2010 Darren Hardy published “The Compound Effect” and attributed a version of the saying to Rohn:^[12] 2010, The Compound Effect by Darren Hardy, Chapter 5: Influences, Quote Page 127, Success Books, Lake Dallas, Texas. (Verified with scans)

Who do you spend the most time with? Who are the people you most admire? Are those two groups of people exactly the same? If not, why not? Jim Rohn taught that we become the combined average of the five people we hang around the most.

In 2015 Peter H. Diamandis and Steven Kotler published “Bold: How To Go Big, Achieve Success, and Impact the World”. They employed the saying and specified an anonymous attribution:^[13]2015, Bold: How To Go Big, Achieve Success, and Impact the World by Peter H. Diamandis and Steven Kotler, Chapter 5: The Secrets of Going Big, Quote Page 108, Simon & Schuster, New York. … Continue reading

There’s an old saying in business: You’re the average of the five people you spend the most time with. The same is true for ideas. As was pointed out in the last chapter, mindset matters.

In conclusion, the evidence is weak, but Jim Rohn is currently the leading candidate for creator of this saying based on the 2005 book by Jack Canfield with Janet Switzer. Daniel G. Amen expressed a similar viewpoint in 1989, and he referred to five people, but Amen did not construct a memorable quotation. Future researchers may discover citations which clarify the situation.

Image Notes: Illustration of brain with colorful splotches from ElisaRiva at Pixabay. Five colors represent five influences on the brain. Image has been resized.

(Great thanks to Anya Nielson whose inquiry led QI to formulate this question and perform this exploration.)