Nobody Wants Constructive Criticism; It’s All We Can Do To Put Up with Constructive Praise

Mignon McLaughlin? Alan Sheldon? Stephen R. Covey? Apocryphal?

Dear Quote Investigator: Receiving criticism is painful even when it is described as constructive. The witty journalist Mignon McLaughlin made a germane comment on this theme. Would you please help me to find a citation.

Quote Investigator: In 1960 the unnamed columnist of “Thoughts and Things” in “The Herald Journal” of Logan, Utah printed the following three remarks without attribution. Boldface added to excerpts: 1

Nobody wants constructive criticism; it’s all we can do to put up with constructive praise.

Women are good listeners, but it’s a waste of time telling your troubles to a man unless there is something specific you want him to do.

Most of us could scrape by on twice our present income.

Interestingly, in 1963 Mignon McLaughlin published “The Neurotic’s Notebook”, and the three remarks above were included in the book. The comment about constructive criticism appeared on page 41 within a chapter about health, happiness, and self-esteem. 2 The remark about listening appeared on page 38 within a chapter about men and women. 3 The statement about income appeared on page 84 within a section about getting and spending. 4

QI believes McLaughlin should receive credit for these three remarks. The 1960 columnist probably saw the statements in a preliminary version of the book or an earlier piece by McLaughlin.

Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.

Continue reading Nobody Wants Constructive Criticism; It’s All We Can Do To Put Up with Constructive Praise

Notes:

  1. 1960 July 14, The Herald-Journal, Thoughts and Things: Put Them in Prisons? He Proposes a Better Way, Quote Page 2, Column 1, Logan, Utah. (Newspapers_com)
  2. 1963, The Neurotic’s Notebook by Mignon McLaughlin, Chapter 4: Health, Happiness, Self-Esteem, Quote Page 41, The Bobbs-Merrill Company, Indianapolis, Indiana. (Verified with scans)
  3. 1963, The Neurotic’s Notebook by Mignon McLaughlin, Chapter 3: Men and Women, Quote Page 38, The Bobbs-Merrill Company, Indianapolis, Indiana. (Verified with scans)
  4. 1963, The Neurotic’s Notebook by Mignon McLaughlin, Chapter 9: Getting and Spending, Quote Page 84, The Bobbs-Merrill Company, Indianapolis, Indiana. (Verified with scans)