I Would Never Die for My Beliefs Because I Might Be Wrong

Bertrand Russell? Ayn Rand? Apocryphal? Dear Quote Investigator: Recently, while reading my Facebook feed I saw a graphic from a major media organization (The Economist) that displayed a picture of the influential philosopher Bertrand Russell coupled with the following quotation: I would never die for my beliefs because I might be wrong. Are these really …

If the Human Brain Were So Simple That We Could Understand It, We Would Be So Simple That We Couldn’t

Lyall Watson? George Edgin Pugh? Emerson M. Pugh? Ken Hill? Dear Quote Investigator: The European Union has launched a ten year scientific venture called the Human Brain Project to build a large-scale neural simulation of the brain. Google has hired the top computer scientist and inventor Ray Kurzweil who has espoused a strategy of reverse-engineering …

There Are Really No Dull Subjects, Only Dull Writers

H. L. Mencken? Raymond Chandler? Woodrow Wilson? Richard Le Gallienne? George Horace Lorimer? Dear Quote Investigator: Successful scribblers believe that all writing should be engaging. A popular adage places the onus squarely on the shoulders of the author: There are no dull subjects, just dull writers. This expression has been attributed to the curmudgeon essayist …

Everyone Who Bought One of Those 30,000 Copies Started a Band

Brian Eno? Lou Reed? Sylvain Sylvain? Apocryphal? Dear Quote Investigator: The most influential rock band of the 1960s and early 1970s was The Velvet Underground, but their path breaking sound did not achieve great commercial success. A popular quip has emerged depicting their importance: The Velvet Underground didn’t sell many records, but everyone who bought …

I Can Write Faster than Anyone Who Can Write Better, and I Can Write Better than Anyone Who Can Write Faster

A. J. Liebling? Shirley Povich? Red Smith? Apocryphal? Dear Quote Investigator: The journalist A. J. Liebling was well-known for his productivity at the typewriter. Yet, high speed in composition and high quality in prose are sometimes antithetical goals. Liebling crafted a statement about his skills that was simultaneously egotistical and self-deprecating: I can write faster …

Let Us Be More Ashamed of Shabby Ideas and Shoddy Philosophies

Albert Einstein? Apocryphal? Dear Quote Investigator: Recently, the dress sense of a leading British politician was criticized, and his sharp rejoinder was based on a quotation attributed to Albert Einstein contrasting the relative importance of shabby clothes versus shabby ideas. Would you please examine the provenance of this statement? Quote Investigator: The earliest evidence of …

Brevity Is the Soul of Lingerie

Dorothy Parker? Apocryphal? Dear Quote Investigator: William Shakespeare memorably wrote that: Brevity is the soul of wit. The wordsmith Dorothy Parker famously transformed the Bard’s phrase into a humorous and erotic remark: Brevity is the soul of lingerie. Several quotation references list Parker’s statement, but the earliest citation I’ve seen is indirect; a friend named …

One Cannot Invent What Does Not Exist. The Genius of Invention Lies in Rediscovering What Has Been Lost, Forgotten, or Misunderstood

Pablo Picasso? Jacques Lassaigne? Mary Chamot? Playboy? Dear Quote Investigator: I came across the following statement attributed to the prominent artist Pablo Picasso: A painter cannot paint what does not exist. He can only rediscover what has been lost, forgotten or misunderstood. This is certainly a curious ontological outlook, but I have not been able …

It Doesn’t Matter Who You Love or How You Love, But That You Love

John Lennon? Rod McKuen? Sally Jessy Raphael? Anonymous? Dear Quote Investigator: There is a popular meme/quotation on social networks such as Facebook, Twitter, and Tumblr: It matters not who you love, where you love, why you love, when you love, or how you love, it matters only that you love. This saying is attributed to …

No One Owns Life, But Anyone Who Can Pick Up a Frying Pan Owns Death

William S. Burroughs? Apocryphal? Dear Quote Investigator: Pronouncements about the dichotomy of life and death are often somber, serious, and banal. However, William S. Burroughs, the postmodernist author of “Naked Lunch” and “Junkie: Confessions of an Unredeemed Drug Addict”, apparently crafted the following eccentric statement: No one owns life, but anyone who can pick up …