Like a Little Bridegroom On a Wedding Cake

Alice Roosevelt Longworth? Marie Corelli? Jane Burr? Rose Guggenheim Winslow? Nancy Hale? Ruth Hanna McCormick? Walter Winchell? Ethel Barrymore? Grace Hodgson Flandrau? Dear Quote Investigator: A U.S. politician running for president was once described as a “little man on a wedding cake” and a “bridegroom on the wedding cake”. This ridicule harmed his campaign, and …

I Really Don’t Mind What People Do, So Long As They Don’t Do It In the Street and Frighten the Horses

Mrs. Patrick Campbell? Beatrice Stella Tanner? Helen Maud Tree? Oscar Wilde? Linkum Fidelius? Washington Irving? Alice Roosevelt Longworth? Eric Erskine Wood? Mrs. Claude Beddington? Frances Ethel Beddington? John Moore? King Edward VII? Ronald Reagan? Anonymous? Dear Quote Investigator: Enforcing societal norms and taboos is an important activity for some people. Others hesitate to proscribe conduct. …

The Only Trouble With Coolidge Is That He Was Weaned on a Pickle

Alice Roosevelt Longworth? Bettina Borrmann Wells? Apocryphal? Anonymous? Dear Quote Investigator: Alice Roosevelt Longworth was the daughter of Theodore Roosevelt and the wife of politician Nicholas Longworth III. For decades she was a well-known socialite in Washington D.C. who experienced praise and condemnation for her sharp wit which was sometimes caustic. Calvin Coolidge who became …

Giving Birth Is Like Pushing a Piano Through a Transom

Fanny Brice? Alice Roosevelt Longworth? Beatrice Lillie? Anonymous? Dear Quote Investigator: Giving birth to a child is an intense physical ordeal. A witty woman employed the following simile: Having a baby is like trying to push a grand piano through a transom. This remark has been attributed to the prominent Washington socialite Alice Roosevelt Longworth …

If You Can’t Say Something Good About Someone, Sit Right Here by Me

Dorothy Parker? Alice Roosevelt Longworth? Earl Wilson? Robert Harling? Anonymous? Dear Quote Investigator: The most trenchant comment pertaining to gossip that I have ever heard is often attributed to the wit Dorothy Parker. The quip is based on altering the following conventional instruction on etiquette: If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say …