Mary Pettibone Poole? A. A. Milne? Dorothy L. Sayers? Apocryphal?
Orange-red quotation marks
Question for Quote Investigator: If you cannot think of something clever to say then you can resort to the next best strategy. You can quote someone else who is clever. This point has been expressed with a concise statement. Would you please help me to determine the creator and find a citation?
Reply from Quote Investigator: A matching quip appeared in the 1938 collection of quotations titled “A Glass Eye at a Keyhole” edited by Mary Pettibone Poole. Some of the items in the collection were already in circulation, and some were formulated by Poole. QI conjectures that the following was authored by Poole. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:1
The next best thing to being clever is being able to quote some one who is.
Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.
Photogravure of Emily Dickinson by artist Laura Coombs Hill
Question for Quote Investigator: Life can be overwhelming. The flow of experience induces intense sensations and emotions. Changes in the world and in each individual are continuous and unavoidable. Here are two versions of a pertinent observation:
(1) To live is so startling it leaves little time for anything else. (2) To live is so startling, it leaves but little room for other occupations.
This notion has been attributed to the famous nineteenth-century poet Emily Dickinson. Is this attribution correct? Would you please help me to find the correct phrasing and a citation?
Reply from Quote Investigator: In the winter of 1871 Emily Dickinson sent a letter to Unitarian minister Thomas Wentworth Higginson who was one of her literary mentors. The letter appeared in the 1894 collection “Letters of Emily Dickinson” edited by Mabel Loomis Todd. Boldface added to excerpt by QI:1
To live is so startling, it leaves but little room for other occupations, though friends are, if possible, an event more fair.
Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.
Franklin D. Roosevelt? James Roosevelt? Richard ‘Skeets’ Gallagher? William ‘Buster’ Collier Jr.? C. Z. Weiser? Anonymous?
Empty seats before a speech from Unsplash
Question for Quote Investigator: Successful public speaking is both difficult and stressful, but it can be highly rewarding. The following tripartite guidance is both cogent and humorous. Here are two versions:
Be brief, be sincere. and be seated. Be sincere, be brief, and be seated.
These words have been credited to U.S. President Franklin D. Roosevelt, but I have never seen a solid citation. Would you please explore this topic?
Reply from Quote Investigator: The earliest ascription to Franklin D. Roosevelt located by QI appeared in “The Washington Post” in January 1940. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:1
The other day James Roosevelt opened a talk he made at Hollywood by saying: “My father gave me these hints on speechmaking. Be sincere … be brief … be seated.”
Thus, there is some evidence that F.D.R. employed the expression while conversing with his son James. However, the remark was already circulating before 1940, and it is unlikely that F.D.R. coined it.
For example, in February 1935 U.S. actor Richard ‘Skeets’ Gallagher appeared on stage in a farce titled “Hollywood Holiday”. After a successful performance there were multiple curtain calls. When Gallagher appeared he delivered a one-line speech:2
Gallagher said his mother had often told him, “When you are called upon to make a speech, always be brief, sincere and be seated.”
It is conceivable that the expression was originally crafted by the mother of Richard ‘Skeets’ Gallagher, but the existence of other apparently unrelated citations in 1935 suggest to QI that the creator remains anonymous.
Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.
Winston Churchill? Ernest Rutherford? Henry Tizard? Apocryphal?
Picture of miscellaneous currency from Unsplash
Question for Quote Investigator: When access to money is restricted it becomes more difficult to accomplish tasks. Deeper and more creative thought is required to make progress. Here are four versions of a pertinent expression:
(1) We have not got any money, so we have got to think. (2) We haven’t any money so we’ve got to think. (3) We have run out of money. I guess we’ll have to think. (4) We are running short of money, so we must begin to think.
This notion has been ascribed to the prominent New Zealand physicist Ernest Rutherford and to the famous British statesman Winston Churchill. I am skeptical because I have not seen a solid citation. Would you please explore this topic?
Reply from Quote Investigator: In 1952 English chemist Henry Tizard was awarded the Messel Medal of the Society of Chemical Industry. He delivered a speech at a meeting of the organization on July 9th which was reported in the journal “The Chemical Age” on July 19th.Tizard employed the saying in his speech, but he credited colleague Ernest Rutherford. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:1
It was just as easy, Sir Henry said, to waste money on research as on anything else—especially if it were the taxpayers’ money. In this connection he recalled a remark once made by the late Lord Rutherford concerning the advantage held by scientists—‘We have not got any money, so we have got to think.’
Tizard clearly felt that the saying was valuable because he used it twice during his speech:2
It was more important to strengthen our technology than to expand our science. We must avoid the luxury of employing first-class scientists on second-class projects. Science was not enough; and he again quoted Lord Rutherford’s words, ‘We have not got any money, so we have got to think.’
The above passages from 1952 are the earliest matches known to QI. Ernest Rutherford died in 1937. The accuracy of the quotation and its ascription is based upon the memory and veracity of Tizard.
Attributions to Winston Churchill appeared by the 1990s, but he died in 1965. The saying does not appear in the comprehensive reference “Churchill By Himself: In His Own Words” compiled by Richard M. Langworth.3QI believes that the linkage to Churchill is not substantive.
Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.
Lin Yutang? Sydney J. Harris? Carl Bakal? Anonymous?
Dress with a revealing slit from Unsplash
Question for Quote Investigator: The kaleidoscopic world of fashion contains fluctuating hemlines, shifting necklines, transparent fabrics, and revealing slits. A pundit once stated that fashion embodies the struggle between the admitted desire to dress and the unadmitted desire to undress. Would you please explore the provenance of this remark?
Reply from Quote Investigator: In 1937 “Vogue” magazine published an essay by Chinese linguist and inventor Lin Yutang which discussed contemporary fashion. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:1
At present, probably the most sophisticated innovation is the long gown with a high slit at the sides, coming away above the knees. The instinct, I feel, is essentially French. For women’s dress is most bewitching when there is a subtle interplay between the art of concealment and the art of revelation. All women’s dresses, in every age and country, are merely variations on the eternal theme of struggle between the admitted desire to dress and the unadmitted desire to undress.
Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.
Question for Quote Investigator: Apparently, a famous psychoanalyst once said that when one looks back at one’s life the periods of struggle will be considered the most beautiful. Do you know whether something like this was said by Sigmund Freud or C. G. Jung?
Reply from Quote Investigator: In 1907 psychotherapist Sigmund Freud wrote a letter to his colleague C. G. Jung in which he encouraged Jung to continue his efforts despite opposition. Freud wished to found a journal which would be called “Internationale Zeitschrift für Psychoanalyse”. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:1
Let us found our journal. People will grumble, buy and read it. One day in retrospect the years of struggle will strike you as the most beautiful.
Freud penned the original statement in German. The translation above by Tania and James Stern appeared in the “Letters of Sigmund Freud” in 1960.
Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.
Charles F. Kettering? Alec Issigonis? T. R. Quaife? Norris Cotton? Paul H. Gilbert? Jimmy Durante? Ed Byron? Georg Christoph Lichtenberg? Anonymous?
Illustration of two camels from Unsplash
Question for Quote Investigator: When the opinions of committee members diverge significantly it becomes difficult to formulate a coherent consensus. This notion has been humorously expressed with a clever adage:
A camel is a horse designed by a committee.
U.S. inventor Charles F. Kettering and U.K. automotive designer Alec Issigonis have received credit for this saying, but I am skeptical because I have never seen a solid citation. Would you please explore this topic?
Reply from Quote Investigator: The earliest match located by QI appeared in “Reader’s Digest” magazine in September 1954 within a section titled “Toward More Picturesque Speech”. The word ‘horse’ was omitted; hence, the match was incomplete. Yet, the key idea was communicated with the words ‘camel’ and ‘committee’. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:1
A camel looks like something put together by a committee (T. R. Quaife)
Often sayings published in “Reader’s Digest” were reprinted in other periodicals and achieved wide distribution. For example, the saying above appeared in November 1954 within the “Stockton Evening Record” of Stockton, California. The newspaper acknowledged “Reader’s Digest”.2 The saying also appeared in the “Manchester Evening News” of Manchester, England. The newspaper acknowledged T. R. Quaife.3
In December 1957 the full quip with the word ‘horse’ appeared within a joke published in “Sports Illustrated” magazine:4
Child: Daddy, what is a camel? Father: What is a what? Child: What is a camel? Father: A camel is a horse that was designed by a committee.
Thus, T. R. Quaife is the leading candidate for creator of the core expression using ‘camel’ and ‘committee’. An anonymous person improved the saying by adding the word ‘horse’.
Thematic precursors depicted the humorous transformation of animals such as the donkey, horse, camel, and cow. Below is an overview with dates representing the evolution of the joke:
1801: Der Esel kommt mir vor wie ein Pferd ins Holländische übersetzt. (Georg Christoph Lichtenberg) Translation: The donkey seems to me like a horse translated into Dutch.
1946 Feb: Daffynition: CAMEL: A warped horse. (Paul H. Gilbert)
1949 Nov: A camel is a horse that swallowed its saddle. (Attributed to Jimmy Durante)
1950 Oct: “What is your definition of a camel?” “That’s a cow upside down.” (Billy Glason)
1954 Sep: A camel looks like something put together by a committee (Attributed to T. R. Quaife in “Reader’s Digest”)
1955 Nov: Even a camel reminds you of an animal that was put together by a committee. (Anonymous)
1956 Feb: giraffe—it’s the kind of an animal that looks like it had been put together by a committee. (Anonymous)
1957 Apr: camel—a beast that looks as if it had been designed by a committee. (Anonymous)
1957 Dec: Child: What is a camel? Father: A camel is a horse that was designed by a committee. (Anonymous)
1958 Feb: A camel is a horse put together by a TV network planning board. (Credited to Ed Byron by Leonard Lyons)
1958 Mar: Heard the new definition of a camel? It’s a race horse designed by a committee. (Anonymous)
1958 Jul: The refreshed definition of a camel: a horse planned by a committee. (Anonymous)
1959 Jun: Definition of a camel: this is “a greyhound put together by a committee.” (Anonymous)
1961 Apr: A camel is a horse designed by a committee. (Attributed to Charles F. Kettering)
1964 Jul: The camel was an example of a horse designed by a committee. (Attributed to Alec Issigonis)
Here are additional selected citations in chronological order.
Georg Christoph Lichtenberg? Stendhal? Marie-Henri Beyle? W. H. Auden? Bayard Taylor?
Depiction of Equus Scotti and other prehistoric animals
Question for Quote Investigator: A German humorist who lived in the 18th century thought the Dutch language sounded ridiculous as indicated by the following quip:
A donkey appears to me like a horse translated into Dutch.
Would you please help me to find the name of the humorist together with a citation?
Reply from Quote Investigator: German physicist and satirist Georg Christoph Lichtenberg died in 1799. His writings were collected and published shortly after his death. The second volume in 1801 contained the following saying in German. One possible translation into English has been included below. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:1
Der Esel kommt mir vor wie ein Pferd ins Holländische übersetzt. The donkey seems to me like a horse translated into Dutch.
The quip was circulating in English by 1879 when it appeared in the book “Studies in German Literature” by Bayard Taylor:2
I think even our extravagant American idea of humor will appreciate his remark that “a donkey is simply a horse translated into Dutch;” . . .
Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.
Illustration of a couple about to kiss from Unsplash
Question for Quote Investigator: A kiss has been described as a “wordless articulation of desires whose object lies in the future.” Would you please help me to determine who made this statement?
Reply from Quote Investigator: In 1986 U.S. essayist and “Time” magazine journalist Lance Morrow published a piece about kissing which included the following passage. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:1
Kissing is a promise that reserves the right of refusal. A kiss is mute and highly articulate. It involves a brief fusion of two heads, the head being the residence of mind and soul. The mouth is simultaneously the front office of language and of hunger.
The kiss is a wordless articulation of desires whose object lies in the future, and somewhat to the south.
What made the screen kiss stimulating in the old days was that the consummation was left to occur in the viewer’s imagination.
Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.
Walt Disney? Carolyn Kay Shafer? Douglas Adams? John Lloyd? Adam Breede? Ralph Spence? Anonymous?
Picture of a boardroom from Unsplash
Question for Quote Investigator: I first encountered the following quip many years ago. Here are two versions:
(1) You don’t have to be crazy to work here, but it helps. (2) You don’t have to be mad to work here, but it does help.
Would you please explore the origin of this humorous remark?
Reply from Quote Investigator: This joke has been employed by famous individuals. For example, in 1933 the entertainment entrepreneur Walt Disney received credit for the jest from his secretary:1
“We have a staff of exceptionally young people. Good fellowship predominates, but we all work hard.
“Mr. Disney is never too busy to be genuinely interested in each individual. He often says jokingly: ‘You don’t have to be crazy to work here, but it helps!’”
This remark fits a template with the phrases “don’t have to be” and “but it helps”. A family of expressions of this type is sometimes called a snowclone. Here is an overview with dates which depicts the evolution of the joke:
1920 Jun: A man don’t have to be crazy to believe in Free Trade, but it helps. (Anonymous)
1920 Jul: You don’t have to be a darn fool to be a detective, but it helps a lot! (Gelett Burgess in “Judge”)
1921 Jul: A man don’t have to be crazy to play golf, but it helps a great deal. (Attributed to unnamed business man in St. Paul, Nebraska)
1923 Nov: One doesn’t have to be a darned fool to be a reporter, but it helps a lot. (John D. MacPhail in “Judge”)
1925 Nov: You don’t have to be crazy to dance the Charleston, but it helps. (Attributed to Ralph Spence)
1925 Jun: You don’t have to be crazy to play this on a saxophone, but it helps a lot. (Crossword clue in “Judge” magazine)
1926 Aug: One doesn’t have to be crazy to pick an all-star team but it helps. (Columnist Percy the Pest)
1930 Dec: “Do you have to be crazy to write poetry?” “No, but it helps” (Anonymous)
1932 Jul: Mr. Allison also admits that one doesn’t have to be crazy to write columns, but that it helps. (Attributed to Albert Allison)
1933 Nov: You don’t have to be crazy to work here, but it helps! (Attributed to Walt Disney)
1934 Sep: You don’t have to be a nut to go hunting and fishing, but it helps. (Columnist Hank in Springfield, Illinois newspaper)
1941 Feb: It is not necessary to go crazy over the work, but it helps. (Engineering student at University of Michigan)
1948 Mar: You don’t have to be mad to work here, but it does help. (Anonymous sign)
Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.
