I Say Hardly Any of Those Clever Things That Are Attributed To Me

Dorothy Parker? Yogi Berra? Apocryphal? Dear Quote Investigator: Numerous sharp remarks have been credited incorrectly to the well-known wit Dorothy Parker. She was well aware of these misattributions, and she once commented that many of those clever remarks were not hers. Would you please help me to find a citation for her general disclaimer? Quote …

In Theory There Is No Difference Between Theory and Practice, While In Practice There Is

Yogi Berra? Albert Einstein? Richard Feynman? Benjamin Brewster? Charles F. Kettering? Walter J. Savitch? Jan L. A. van de Snepscheut? Dave Jeske? Chuck Reid? Dear Quote Investigator: The following popular adage balances unsteadily between brilliance and absurdity: In theory, theory and practice are the same. In practice, they are not. This notion has been attributed …

I Thank All of You for Making This Night Necessary

Yogi Berra? Apocryphal? Dear Quote Investigator: An entertaining tale states that baseball great Yogi Berra was once honored at a ceremony extolling his athletic skills. He knew of his obligation to give a speech after the receipt of the accolades and gifts, and his prepared remarks included a statement thanking everyone for making the event …

Joke Origin: Always Go To Other People’s Funerals — Otherwise, They Won’t Come To Yours

Yogi Berra? J. F. Shaw Kennedy? Charles Lee? Punch Magazine? Clarence Day? Anonymous? Question for Quote Investigator: A comical remark about funeral attendance has been attributed to the baseball great Yogi Berra: Always go to other people’s funerals; otherwise they won’t go to yours. A simple interpretation seems to require ghosts to attend a future …

If George Washington Were Alive Today He’d Turn Over in His Grave

Who made the remark? Samuel Goldwyn? Yogi Berra? William Cuffe? George Arliss? Corey Ford? Gerald Ford? Who was turning? Richard Cobden? Aunt Harriet? Jules Verne? Franklin D. Roosevelt? George Washington? Abraham Lincoln? Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky? John Foster Dulles? Casey Stengel? Dear Quote Investigator: Samuel Goldwyn and Yogi Berra were both famous for constructing humorous phrases. …

If People Don’t Want to Come, Nothing Will Stop Them

Yogi Berra? Sol Hurok? Apocryphal? Anonymous? Dear Quote Investigator: Baseball luminary Yogi Berra is famous for comical pronouncements that contain a kernel of wisdom. One of my favorites is about fan attendance at baseball games: If people don’t want to come out to the ballpark, nobody’s going to stop them. Recently, I heard that renowned …

Quote Origin: Nobody Goes There Anymore, It’s Too Crowded

Yogi Berra? Rags Ragland? Suzanne Ridgeway? John McNulty? Ukie Sherin? Anonymous? Question for Quote Investigator: An amusing anecdote states that baseball great Yogi Berra was once asked whether he wished to have dinner at a highly-regarded restaurant, and he replied with a remark combining wisdom with contradiction: Nobody goes there anymore. It’s too crowded. Is …

Do You Want Six or Eight Slices of Pizza?

Yogi Berra? Ken Thompson? Bobby Bragan? Muriel Vernick? Danny Osinski? Andy Wimpfheimer? George Carlin? Anonymous? Dear Quote Investigator: There is a comical tale about whether a pizza should be cut into six or eight slices. The punchline is typically attributed to an athlete such as Yogi Berra. Are you familiar with this joke? Would you …

I Had to Get Up to Answer the Phone Anyway

Yogi Berra? Desi Arnaz? Carl Brandt? Apocryphal? Dear Quote Investigator: The following anecdote is told about baseball great Yogi Berra. He received a telephone call very early in the morning, and the caller apologetically said, “I hope I didn’t wake you.” Yogi replied: Nah, I had to get up to answer the phone anyway. Is …

Quote Origin: It’s Difficult to Make Predictions, Especially About the Future

Niels Bohr? Samuel Goldwyn? K. K. Steincke? Robert Storm Petersen? Yogi Berra? Mark Twain? Nostradamus? Anonymous? Question for Quote Investigator: There is a family of popular humorous sayings about the formidable task of successful prognostication. Here are five examples: Of course, a prediction is inherently about the future, and the modifiers “especially” and “particularly” emphasize …