Quote Investigator® – Page 114

Quote Origin: Everything Is About Sex Except Sex. Sex Is About Power

Oscar Wilde? Michael Cunningham? Robert Klitzman? Robert Michels? Frank Underwood? Kevin Spacey? Apocryphal? Anonymous?

Question for Quote Investigator: While reading about the precipitous downfall of an influential literary tastemaker and powerbroker at “The Paris Review” I encountered once again a remark attributed to Oscar Wilde. Here are three versions:

Everything is about sex except sex. Sex is about power.
Everything is about sex, except sex, which is about power.
Everything in the world is about sex, except sex. Sex is about power.

The Wilde ascription is often labeled apocryphal. What do you think?

Reply from Quote Investigator: QI has found no substantive evidence that Oscar Wilde wrote or said this remark. It is not listed in the valuable compendium “The Wit & Wisdom of Oscar Wilde” assembled by quotation expert Ralph Keyes.¹

The earliest close match located by QI appeared in the “Provincetown Arts” journal of 1995. Author Michael Cunningham employed the saying during an interview conducted by fellow author Paul Lisicky. Cunningham is now best known for the Pulitzer Prize-winning novel “The Hours”. Emphasis added to excerpts by QI:²

If you’re writing about what people do to and with one another, it’s sort of crazy to leave sex out. I think Oscar Wilde said, “Everything in human life is really about sex, except sex. Sex is about power.” And I think he’s got something there.

Cunningham disclaimed coinage and provided an attribution that was both tentative and implausible. Hence, the saying remains anonymous.

Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.

Quote Origin: Scratch an Actor and Underneath You’ll Find Another Actor

Laurence Olivier? Homer Fickett? Anonymous?

Question for Quote Investigator: The acclaimed actor Laurence Olivier performed many different roles during his long career. He said something like:

Scratch an actor, and you’ll find an actor.

Would you please help me to find a citation? Did he originate this statement?

Reply from Quote Investigator: Laurence Olivier did help to popularize this saying, but he did not craft it. In 1986 he published “On Acting” which included the following. Emphasis added to excerpts by QI:¹

We actors stand by our present performance, not by our past. We are as immediate as the moment. We give you our feelings and hope you will return yours. We ask for acceptance; we are your servants.

Scratch an actor and underneath you’ll find another actor.

Olivier also stated that true actors felt “at any moment the laughter will stop and the rain of tomatoes will begin”. Thus, his desire to please an audience and inhabit a role erased his identity. He became an actor nested within an actor.

Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.

Quote Origin: Scratch an Actor and You’ll Find an Actress

Dorothy Parker? Walter Winchell? Apocryphal?

Question for Quote Investigator: Dorothy Parker was well known for her sometimes controversial witticisms. Apparently, one of her remarks was based on clichés about the vanity, mannerisms, and/or sexuality of actors. Would you please examine this topic?

Reply from Quote Investigator: The earliest match located by QI appeared in the widely-syndicated column of Walter Winchell in 1940:¹

Don’t use “Scratch an actor and you’ll find an actress!” It’s an oldie of Dorothy Parker’s.

Winchell stated that the remark was already old, and it probably would have been difficult to publish in a newspaper in the 1920s when Parker was delivering lines at the Algonquin Roundtable.

Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.

Quote Origin: A Dramatic Critic Is a Guy Who Surprises the Playwright by Informing Him What He Meant

Creator: Wilson Mizner, playwright, entrepreneur, adventurer

Context: Mizner died in 1933. A biography of his colorful life appeared in 1935 called “The Fabulous Wilson Mizner” by Edward Dean Sullivan. The chapter “Miznerisms” was dedicated to his witticisms. Here were three. Emphasis added to excerpts:¹

I am a stylist—and the most beautiful sentence I have ever heard is: “Have one on the house.”

A dramatic critic is a guy who surprises the playwright by informing him what he meant.

I’ve known countless people who were reservoirs of learning yet never had a thought.

In 1949 Evan Esar, the industrious collector of sayings, placed a slightly modified version in “The Dictionary of Humorous Quotations”. The words “dramatic” and “guy” were changed to “drama” and “person”:²

MIZNER, Wilson, 1876-1933, American dramatist, bon vivant, and wit.
A drama critic is a person who surprises the playwright by informing him what he meant.

In 1989 “Leo Rosten’s Giant Book of Laughter” printed another version of the quip:³

Critic: A person who surprises an author by informing him what he meant.
Wilson Mizner

Nowadays, it is commonplace to find critics who claim superior knowledge or insight when disagreeing with the creator of an artwork.

Update History: On April 11, 2025 the format of the bibliographical notes was updated.

1935, The Fabulous Wilson Mizner by Edward Dean Sullivan, Chapter 17: Miznerisms, Quote Page 270, The Henkle Company, New York. (Verified with hardcopy) ↩︎
1949, The Dictionary of Humorous Quotations, Edited by Evan Esar, Section: Wilson Mizner, Quote Page 145, Doubleday, Garden City, New York. (Verified on hardcopy in 1989 reprint edition from Dorset Press, New York) ↩︎
1989, Leo Rosten’s Giant Book of Laughter: The greatest jokes, one-liners, bloopers, and stories for everyone who loves to laugh by Leo Rosten (Leo Calvin Rosten), Topic: Criticism, Quote Page 124, Bonanza Books, New York. (Verified with scans) ↩︎

Quote Origin: I Know of a Cure for Everything: Salt Water . . . Sweat, or Tears, or the Salt Sea

Isak Dinesen? Tania Blixen? Karen Blixen? Apocryphal?

Question for Quote Investigator: The three best ways to overcome a difficulty are: (1) performing hard physical labor, (2) crying to achieve emotional release, or (3) visiting the ocean. The prominent author Isak Dinesen apparently crafted a lovely formulation for this advice:

The cure for anything is salt water: sweat, tears, or the sea.

Would you please help me to find a citation?

Reply from Quote Investigator: Isak Dinesen and Tania Blixen were pen names of Karen Blixen who wrote the books “Out of Africa” and “Babette’s Feast” which were made into award-winning movies. This article will use the name Isak Dinesen.

In 1934 Dinesen published the short story collection “Seven Gothic Tales” which included “The Deluge at Norderney”. One of the characters named Jonathan Maersk, became unhappy when he learned that his father, ship captain Clement Maersk, was not his genetic father. He visited the ocean and contemplated ending his life, but a woman in black lace unnerved him when she appeared and asked to die with him. Jonathan later spoke to his father Clement and asked whether he knew of a cure for his melancholy. Emphasis added to excerpts:¹

“‘Why, yes,’ he said, ‘I know of a cure for everything: salt water.’

“‘Salt water?’ I asked him.

“‘Yes,’ he said, ‘in one way or the other. Sweat, or tears, or the salt sea.’

“I said: ‘I have tried sweat and tears. The salt sea I meant to try, but a woman in black lace prevented me.’

QI believes that the statement presented by the questioner was derived from the passage above. See the August 1934 citation for further details.

Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.

Quote Origin: Point of View Is Worth 80 IQ Points

Alan Kay? Andy Hertzfeld? Michael Eisner? Apocryphal?

Question for Quote Investigator: The Roman numeral system is powerful enough to express numbers such as 1776 (MDCCLXXVI), but the system is terrible for performing arithmetic operations such as division. A fresh perspective is required. A positional system such as the decimal numeral system is dramatically superior for computation. This is one example of a principle that can be informally conveyed with the following statements:

Point of view is worth 80 IQ points.
Perspective is worth 80 I.Q. points.
A change of perspective is worth 80 IQ points.

Xerox PARC researcher Alan Kay who pioneered personal computing and object-oriented programming has received credit for this saying. Would you please help me to find a citation?

Reply from Quote Investigator: Andy Hertzfeld was a leading member of the Apple Macintosh development team. In July 1982 he attended a lecture by Alan Kay and found the delivered remarks so insightful that he recorded them in a notebook. Years later he started a website called folklore.org and shared some of his lecture notes. Emphasis added to excerpts by QI:¹

Slogans:
Better is the enemy of best
Relative judgements have no place in art
Systems programmers are high priests of a low cult
Point of view is worth 80 IQ points
Good ideas don’t often scale

Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.

Quote Origin: Never Write an Advertisement Which You Wouldn’t Want Your Own Family To Read

Creator: David Ogilvy, influential advertising executive who founded the top firm Ogilvy & Mather

Context: In 1963 Ogilvy published the best-seller “Confessions of an Advertising Man” which included the following advice:¹

Never Write an Advertisement Which You Wouldn’t Want Your Own Family To Read.

You wouldn’t tell lies to your own wife. Don’t tell them to mine. Do as you would be done by.

To dissuade readers from using deception Ogilvy emphasized the negative repercussions of lying to the consumer:

If you tell lies about a product, you will be found out—either by the Government, which will prosecute you, or by the consumer, who will punish you by not buying your product a second time.

Acknowledgement: Thanks to ‘Effector’ who asked QI to verify a solid citation for this quotation.

Update History: On April 11, 2025 the format of the bibliographical notes was updated.

1963, Confessions of an Advertising Man by David Ogilvy, Chapter 5: How to Build Great Campaigns, Quote Page 99, Atheneum, New York. (Verified with hardcopy) ↩︎

Quote Origin: A Stumble Is Not a Fall

Malcolm X? Oprah Winfrey? Haitian Proverb? Portuguese Proverb? Henry Rich? Thomas Fuller? Thomas Dunn English? Anonymous?

Question for Quote Investigator: While pursuing an objective one may make errors and suffer setbacks, but these impediments to progress are not insurmountable. Here are two versions of an analogical proverb offering encouragement:

Stumbling is not falling.
A stumble is not a fall.

This saying has been attributed to entrepreneur Oprah Winfrey, and activist Malcolm X. It has also been called a Portuguese and Haitian Proverb. Would you please examine this topic?

Reply from Quote Investigator: Malcolm X received credit in the 2000s which is very late. Oprah Winfrey did use the expression during a commencement speech in 2016.

The adage has a very long history. In 1643 Henry Rich, 1st Earl of Holland made an apologetic official declaration which included a thematically related proverb. Emphasis added to excerpts by QI:¹

And since I have made an uneven Step, from the Unclearness of my Information, more than from the Unfaithfulness of my Affections or Intentions, I hope it may be look’d upon and consider’d as the Proverb that saith, Whosoever stumbles, and falls not, gets rather than loses ground.

Interestingly, the above saying depicted a stumble positively. Another positive precursor occurred in the 1732 compilation “Gnomologia” edited by Thomas Fuller. The reference included the following four sequential items:²

423 A stout Heart crushes ill Luck.
424 A Stumble may prevent a Fall.
425 A streight Stick is crooked in the Water.
426 A successful Man loses no Reputation.

The adage above has continued to circulate in books and periodicals up to the present day. Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.

Quote Origin: That’s the Trouble, a Sex Symbol Becomes a Thing. I Just Hate To Be a Thing

Marilyn Monroe? Apocryphal?

Question for Quote Investigator: Glamourous movie icon Marilyn Monroe apparently expressed misgivings about her sex symbol status because she did not wish to be viewed simply as a thing. Would you please help me to find a citation for her remarks on this topic?

Reply from Quote Investigator: “LIFE” magazine Associate Editor Richard Meryman and Marilyn Monroe engaged in a series of conversations, and the transcripts were edited into the form of a lengthy monologue which was published in “LIFE” in August 1962 shortly before the death of Monroe. The following passage includes a pun on cymbals versus symbols. Emphasis added to excerpts by QI:¹

I never quite understood it — this sex symbol — I always thought symbols were those things you clash together! That’s the trouble, a sex symbol becomes a thing. I just hate to be a thing. But if I’m going to be a symbol of something I’d rather have it sex than some other things they’ve got symbols of!

Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.

Quote Origin: Never Disregard a Book Because the Author of It Is a Ridiculous Fellow

Lord Melbourne? Apocryphal?

Question for Quote Investigator: I once saw a proverb stating that one should not ignore a book simply because the author is a foolish person. Are you familiar with this proverb of encouragement for many writers?

Reply from Quote Investigator: Lord Melbourne (William Lamb) served as Prime Minister of the United Kingdom in the 1830s. He wrote notes about his life and his thoughts in a commonplace book he kept from about 1809 until 1832. Decades later an editor selected material from the commonplace book and included it within the 1889 book “Lord Melbourne’s Papers”. Here were two statements penned by the statesman. Emphasis added to excerpts by QI:¹

Never disregard a book because the author of it is a ridiculous fellow.

Nothing injures poetry so much as over-consideration and cold and critical correction.

Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.