Quote Investigator® – Page 189

For Attractive Lips, Speak Words of Kindness

Audrey Hepburn? Sam Levenson? Anonymous?

Dear Quote Investigator: Audrey Hepburn was a magnificent movie star, and she was also a well-known worker for humanitarian causes. On various websites I have seen a collection of sayings called “Time Tested Beauty Tips” that have been attributed to her. The first tip says:

For attractive lips, speak words of kindness.

I have never seen a proper reference to an interview or a book showing that Hepburn created these tips. Could you examine the provenance of this set of statements?

Quote Investigator: The best evidence suggests that Audrey Hepburn read these words to family members, but she did not claim credit for them.

A version of the “Time Tested Beauty Tips” was printed in a 2005 memoir written by Sean Hepburn Ferrer about his mother Audrey Hepburn. A very similar version was printed in a 1996 biography titled “Audrey Hepburn” by Barry Paris. Both of these works stated that the tips were originally created by Sam Levenson who was a prominent television personality, humorist, and bestselling author.

In fact, there were two distinct passages from the 1973 book “In One Era and Out the Other” by Levenson that were combined to yield the modern set of tips. When Levenson’s daughter Emily started to date he discussed with her different concepts of beauty:[ref] 1973 Copyright, In One Era and Out the Other by Sam Levenson, Quote Page 177, Pocket Books: A Division of Simon & Schuster, New York. (First Simon and Schuster edition published in 1973; Pocket Books edition published in November 1974) (Verified with scans of Pocket Books edition)[/ref]

I even suggested several time-tested inexpensive beauty hints:

For attractive lips, speak words of kindness.
For lovely eyes, seek out the good in people.
For a slim figure, share your food with the hungry.
For beautiful hair, let a child run his fingers through it once a day.
For poise, walk with the knowledge that you will never walk alone.

When his first grandchild, Georgia, was born Levenson composed a short letter addressed to her:[ref] 1973 Copyright, In One Era and Out the Other by Sam Levenson, Quote Page 190, Pocket Books: A Division of Simon & Schuster, New York. (First Simon and Schuster edition published in 1973; Pocket Books edition published in November 1974) (Verified with scans of Pocket Books edition)[/ref]

We leave you a tradition with a future. The tender loving care of human beings will never become obsolete. People, even more than things, have to be restored, renewed, revived, reclaimed, and redeemed, and redeemed, and redeemed . . . Never throw out anybody.

Remember, if you ever need a helping hand, you’ll find one at the end of your arm. As you grow older you will discover that you have two hands. One for helping yourself, the other for helping others. …

Your good old days are still ahead of you. May you have many of them.

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Nostalgia Is Not What It Used To Be

Yogi Berra? Simone Signoret? Peter De Vries? Tommy Handley & Ronald Frankau? Anonymous?

Dear Quote Investigator: Holidays sometimes make me nostalgic. They also remind me of the following clever quip:

Nostalgia ain’t what it used to be.

These words are often attributed to the famed baseball quotemaster Yogi Berra, but recently I learned of an autobiography by the prominent French actress Simone Signoret titled:

Nostalgia Isn’t What It Used To Be.

Could you explore the origin of this saying?

Quote Investigator: The earliest evidence of this expression known to QI was published in a 1959 novel titled “The Tents of Wickedness” by Peter De Vries. This citation is given in the key reference work “The Dictionary of Modern Proverbs” from Yale University Press. De Vries was a popular humorist who worked at “The New Yorker” magazine and published many novels:[ref] 1959, The Tents of Wickedness by Peter De Vries, Quote Page 6, Little, Brown and Company, Boston, Massachusetts. (Verified on paper)[/ref][ref] 2012, The Dictionary of Modern Proverbs, Compiled by Charles Clay Doyle, Wolfgang Mieder, and Fred R. Shapiro Page 179, Yale University Press, New Haven. (Verified on paper) [/ref]

No. Nostalgia, as his Uncle Joshua had said, ain’t what it used to be.
Which made it pretty complete. Nothing was what it used to be — not even nostalgia.

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When I Was Younger, I Could Remember Anything, Whether It Had Happened or Not

Mark Twain? Albert Bigelow Paine? Apocryphal?

Dear Quote Investigator: Mark Twain formulated a wonderful expression about the fallibility of memory as one grows older. Here is the beginning of his humorous saying:

When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not.

My own memory may be failing because I think I have seen multiple versions of the full statement. Is there more than one version? Which version is correct?

Quote Investigator: Yes, there are three important variants of this quotation that have been ascribed to Mark Twain. Intriguingly, the meaning of the quotation and the nature of the joke changed as the statement was revised. Here are the three versions with dates. Boldface has been added:

1907: When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying, now, and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that happened.

1912: When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not; but I am getting old, and soon I shall remember only the latter.

1924: When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now, and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened.

Mark Twain worked on his autobiography for many years, and during this process he sometimes published sections. The first statement above was included in a draft chapter of his autobiography that was printed in the March 1907 issue of “The North American Review”. Before presenting the statement Twain mentioned an incident from his memory which he now believed was a “delusion”:[ref] 1907 March 1, The North American Review, Memories of a Southern Farm: A Chapter From Mark Twain’s Autobiography – XIII by Mark Twain, Start Page 449, Quote Page 451, (University of Northern Iowa, Cedar Falls, Iowa), Franklin Square, New York. (Verified on microfilm)[/ref]

My brother Henry was six months old at that time. I used to remember his walking into a fire outdoors when he was a week old. It was remarkable in me to remember a thing like that, which occurred when I was so young. And it was still more remarkable that I should cling to the delusion, for thirty years, that I did remember it — for of course it never happened; he would not have been able to walk at that age. If I had stopped to reflect, I should not have burdened my memory with that impossible rubbish so long.

Immediately preceding the quotation Twain presented another memory that he now considered unreliable:

For many years I believed that I remembered helping my grandfather drink his whiskey toddy when I was six weeks old, but I do not tell about that any more, now; I am grown old, and my memory is not as active as it used to be. When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying, now, and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that happened. It is sad to go to pieces like this, but we all have to do it.

Twain’s joke was counterintuitive because he was comically arguing that his memory was actually improving as he aged. Impossible, and hence inaccurate, memories were being rejected. The conventional viewpoint usually asserts the opposite thesis that memory becomes less reliable as one ages. Indeed, the joke was later modified to accord with the conventional stance.

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If Tetris Has Taught Me Anything, It’s That Errors Pile Up and Accomplishments Disappear

@AlexeSixx? @_NanooChii? @ Soumi_S? @MissMagdo? @damana?

Dear Quote Investigator: I have spent hours playing the quasi-hypnotic computer game Tetris. The following astutely funny remark reveals the subversive lesson of the game:

If Tetris has taught me anything, it’s that errors pile up and accomplishments disappear.

I have seen this statement tweeted and retweeted many times. Can you determine who first said it?

Quote Investigator: Tracing a recent expression like this is often difficult because the timestamps listed on websites are easy to modify retroactively; hence, those timestamps may be inaccurate. On the other hand, the database of tweets does appear to have reliable dates, and this article will rely on twitter timestamps.

Another complication occurs when an expression is highly mutable. The earliest strong semantic match located by QI appeared in a tweet on March 26, 2011 from the twitter handle Alexandra Melo @AlexeSixx:[ref] Tweet, From: Alexandra Melo @AlexeSixx, Time: 7:19 PM, Date: March 26, 2011, Text: Life is a Tetris. Do something good, it disappears immediately. But mistakes, they accumulate themselves. In the end everyone loses. (Accessed on twitter.com on December 10, 2017) link [/ref]

Life is a Tetris. Do something good, it disappears immediately. But mistakes, they accumulate themselves. In the end everyone loses.

The phrasing above differed from the common modern saying although the underlying meaning matched, and the key term “disappear” was shared. On March 27, 2011 a very similar tweet emanated from the handle rawwwwwwest @_NanooChii,[ref] Tweet, From: rawwwwwwest @_NanooChii, Time: 10:23 PM, Date: March 27, 2011, Text: Life is a Tetris. Do something good, it disappears immediately. But mistakes, they, they accumulate. In the end everyone loses. (Accessed on twitter.com on December 10, 2017) link [/ref] and on April 1, 2011 a similar tweet was sent by Soumi_A @Soumi_S.[ref] Tweet, From: Soumi_A @Soumi_S, Time: 3:01 PM, Date: April 1, 2011, Text: Life is like Tetris game. Do something good, it disappears immediately. But mistakes, they accumulate. In the end everyone loses. (Accessed on twitter.com on December 10, 2017) link [/ref]

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I Used To Be Snow White, But I Drifted

Mae West? A College Student? Anonymous?

Dear Quote Investigator: The actress, screenwriter, and sex symbol Mae West was well-known for delivering double entendres. Here are two examples of clever lines with multiple meanings:

I was once pure as snow, but then I drifted.
I used to be Snow White but I drifted.

Did Mae West coin either of these quips?

Quote Investigator: A version of the first joke was in circulation on college campuses by the 1920s. In 1921 the student publication “The Virginia Reel” from the University of Virginia printed the following:[ref] 1921 April 18, The Virginia Reel, (Freestanding quotation), Quote Page 30, Published by the students of the University of Virginia. (Google Books full view) link [/ref]

“She was as pure and as white as snow.”
“Yes, but she drifted.” — Yale Record.

The earliest evidence known to QI of a match for the second joke appeared in 1938 in the syndicated Hollywood gossip column of Ed Sullivan who credited the words to West:[ref] 1938 May 4, Augusta Chronicle, Hollywood by Ed Sullivan, Page 4, Column 5, Augusta, Georgia. (GenealogyBank)[/ref]

Mae West tells vaudeville audiences: “I used to be Snow White, but I drifted.”

Note that West referenced the fairy tale character Snow White, but the earlier joke simply referred to white snow. Hence, West added another comical layer of symbolism.

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Comedy Is Tragedy Plus Time

Carol Burnett? Woody Allen? Tig Notaro? Steve Allen? Lenny Bruce? Bob Newhart? Thomas Hardy? Anonymous?

Dear Quote Investigator: Some humorists are able to transform disastrous or mortifying episodes in their own lives into hilarious comedy routines. Usually some time must pass before a painful memory is distant enough that it can be transmuted into something funny. The popular performer Carol Burnett once said:

I got my sense of humor from my mother. I’d tell her my tragedies. She’d make me laugh. She said comedy is tragedy plus time.

I have heard this formula attributed to other comics such as Woody Allen and Tig Notaro. It seems to apply to general events and not just personal incidents. Do you know who first crafted this formula?

Quote Investigator: The earliest evidence of this saying located by QI was published in Cosmopolitan magazine in February 1957. The television personality, actor, and polymath Steve Allen presented his viewpoint on the genesis of comedy. Boldface has been added to excerpts:[ref] 1957 February, Cosmopolitan, Volume 142, Steve Allen’s Almanac by Steve Allen, (This column was part of a series published between 1956 and 1957), Start Page 12, Hearst Corp., New York. (Verified with scans from the Browne Popular Culture Library of Bowling Green State University; great thanks to the librarians at BGSU who provided a digital image of a document in the “Steve Allen Collection”)[/ref]

When I explained to a friend recently that the subject matter of most comedy is tragic (drunkenness, overweight, financial problems, accidents, etc.) he said, “Do you mean to tell me that the dreadful events of the day are a fit subject for humorous comment? The answer is “No, but they will be pretty soon.”

Man jokes about the things that depress him, but he usually waits till a certain amount of time has passed. It must have been a tragedy when Judge Crater disappeared, but everybody jokes about it now. I guess you can make a mathematical formula out of it. Tragedy plus time equals comedy.

Joseph Crater was a judge in New York City who puzzlingly disappeared in 1930. Newspaper reports on the never-solved case mentioned: a secret blond mistress, missing money, corrupt politicians, and purloined papers. Eventually the event became grist for comedy and even graffiti scrawls such as:[ref] 1980 August 5, Chicago Tribune, “Column 1: Judge Crater case slips into history Police file is closed on ‘missingest’ person” by Janet Cawley, Quote Page 1, Column 1, Chicago, Illinois. (ProQuest)[/ref][ref] 1966 September 12, Springfield Union, New York Scene: A Rash of Graffiti by Norton Mockridge, Quote Page 6, Column 8, Springfield, Massachusetts. (GenealogyBank)[/ref]

Judge Crater—Call Your Office

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It Isn’t the Mountain Ahead That Wears You Out; It Is the Grain of Sand in Your Shoe

Muhammad Ali? Robert W. Service? Anonymous?

Dear Quote Investigator: The following quotation about perseverance is attributed to the famed boxer Muhammad Ali:

It isn’t the mountains ahead to climb that wear you out; it’s the pebble in your shoe.

While I was researching this phrase I came across another version that was attributed to the popular poet Robert W. Service who died in 1958:

It isn’t the mountain ahead that wears you out — it’s the grain of sand in your shoe.

Could you provide clarification?

Quote Investigator: The earliest evidence located by QI was printed in 1916 in a trade publication for the insurance industry. The adage was printed with no accompanying text as a filler item, and no attribution was given:[ref] 1916 May 18, The Western Underwriter, Section: Life, (Freestanding quote without attribution), Quote Page 10, Column 2, Published by the Western Underwriter Company, Cincinnati, Ohio and Chicago, Illinois. (Google Books full view) link [/ref]

It isn’t the mountain ahead that wears you out; it is the grain of sand in your shoe.

In 1920 the expression was published in “The Journal of the New York State Teachers Association”. Once again, no attribution was given. Other sayings emphasizing steadfastness and determination were printed adjacent to the statement:[ref] 1920 February, The Journal of the New York State Teachers Association, Volume 7, Number 1, (Freestanding short passage), Quote Page 31, Column 2, Published by The New York State Teachers Association, Rochester, New York. (Google Books full view) link [/ref]

It isn’t the mountain ahead that wears you out; it is the grain of sand in your shoe.

Back up your ideas with courage that will not back down, and there will be no way too long, no road too rough.

The reason most men and women do not accomplish more is that they do not attempt more.

By 1925 the saying had been extended with an explanatory sentence. This longer version was published in Forbes magazine together with the single word acknowledgment: “Service”. QI hypothesizes that this word referred to a magazine or newsletter called “Service” and not to the poet Robert W. Service. If Forbes wished to credit the “Bard of the Yukon” then his full name would have been listed:[ref] 1925 May 1, Forbes, Thoughts on Life and Business, Quote Page 104, Column 3, Forbes Inc., New York. (Verified on microfilm)[/ref]

It isn’t the mountain ahead that wears you out—it’s the grain of sand in your shoe. Be master of your petty annoyances and conserve your energies for the big worth while things.—Service.

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We Are Made of Star-Stuff

Carl Sagan? Albert Durrant Watson? Doris Lessing? Harlow Shapley? Vincent Cronin? Ancient Serbian Proverb? William E. Barton? Anonymous?

Dear Quote Investigator: The chemical elements of life such as carbon, magnesium, and calcium were originally created in the interior furnaces of stars and then released by stellar explosions. This fact can be expressed with a beautiful poetic resonance. Here are three examples:

We are made of star-stuff.
Our bodies are made of star-stuff.
There are pieces of star within us all.

I think the well-known astronomer and science communicator Carl Sagan said this. Would you please trace this expression? Was Sagan the first person to say this?

Quote Investigator: In 1973 Carl Sagan published “The Cosmic Connection: An Extraterrestrial Perspective” which included the following passage. Boldface has been added here and below:[ref] 1973, The Cosmic Connection: An Extraterrestrial Perspective by Carl Sagan, Produced by Jerome Agel, Quote Page 189 and 190, Anchor Press/Doubleday, Garden City, New York. (Verified on paper)[/ref]

Our Sun is a second- or third-generation star. All of the rocky and metallic material we stand on, the iron in our blood, the calcium in our teeth, the carbon in our genes were produced billions of years ago in the interior of a red giant star. We are made of star-stuff.

Sagan was an important locus for the dissemination of this expression; however, it has a long history. An interesting precursor appeared in a North Carolina newspaper in 1913. A columnist pointed out that the Sun and Earth were made of star-stuff. This implied that humans were also made of star-stuff, but this was not directly stated:[ref] 1913 June 15, Greensboro Daily News, Star Land by Ellen Frizell Wyckoff, Quote Page 8, Column 5, Greensboro, North Carolina. (GenealogyBank) (“analizes” was replaced with “analyzes” in the passage above) [/ref]

The spectroscope analyzes the light if you please, and shows what it is made of. What was the surprise of the tireless searchers when they found common earth metals burning in the mighty sun!

There was once a little girl who cried out with joy when she realized for one little moment that the earth is truly a heavenly body, and that no matter what is happening to us we are really living right up among the stars. The sun is made of “star stuff, and the earth is made of the same material, put together with a difference.”

In 1918 the President of the Royal Astronomical Society of Canada delivered a speech with the phrase “our bodies are made of star-stuff”, and he seemed to be reaching for a quasi-spiritual interpretation for this fact:[ref] 1918 March, The Journal of the Royal Astronomical Society of Canada, Volume 12, Number 3, Astronomy: A Cultural Avocation by Albert Durrant Watson, (Retiring President’s Address, Annual Meeting, January 29, 1918), Start Page 81, Quote Page 89, Royal Astronomical Society of Canada, Printed for the Society in Toronto, Canada. (HathiTrust) link [/ref]

It is true that a first thoughtful glimpse of the immeasurable universe is liable rather to discourage us with a sense of our own insignificance. But astronomy is wholesome even in this, and helps to clear the way to a realization that as our bodies are an integral part of the great physical universe, so through them are manifested laws and forces that take rank with the highest manifestation of Cosmic Being.

Thus we come to see that if our bodies are made of star-stuff,—and there is nothing else, says the spectroscope, to make them of—the loftier qualities of our being are just as necessarily constituents of that universal substance out of which are made

“Whatever gods there be.”

We are made of universal and divine ingredients, and the study of the stars will not let us escape a wholesome and final knowledge of the fact.

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Quotation Is a Serviceable Substitute for Wit

Oscar Wilde? W. Somerset Maugham? George Bernard Shaw? Voltaire? Apocryphal?

Dear Quote Investigator: I thought you might enjoy the following remark attributed to Oscar Wilde:

Quotation is a serviceable substitute for wit.

I saw this on the goodreads website, but the source of the saying was not listed. Further searching led to the following similar comment attributed to Somerset Maugham:

The ability to quote is a serviceable substitute for wit.

This situation is confusing. Is either of these quotations genuine?

Quote Investigator: QI has found no substantive evidence that Oscar Wilde said or wrote either of these statements.

A version of the expression was included in the story “The Creative Impulse” by W. Somerset Maugham. This popular tale was reprinted several times and was even made into a television episode. Interestingly, the quote was not included in the first publication of the short story in Harper’s Bazaar magazine in 1926.[ref] 1926 August, Harper’s Bazar (Harper’s Bazaar), The Creative Impulse by W. Somerset Maugham, Start Page 41, Hearst Corp., New York. (In 1926 the magazine used the name “Harper’s Bazar”. Later it switched to the name “Harper’s Bazaar”) (Verified on microfilm) [/ref]

The story was revised, expanded, and published again in a 1931 collection called “Six Stories Written in the First Person Singular”. The expression was used when a character named Mrs. Albert Forrester was described. Boldface has been added:[ref] 1977 (Reprint of 1931 Doubleday, Doran & Company, Garden City, New York edition), Six Stories Written in the First Person Singular by W. Somerset Maugham, (This volume is part of a series: The Works of W. Somerset Maugham), Short story: The Creative Impulse, Start Page 249, Quote Page 255, Arno Press: A New York Times Company, New York. (Quote verified in 1977 reprint)[/ref]

She had a pretty gift for quotation, which is a serviceable substitute for wit, and having for thirty years known more or less intimately a great many distinguished people, she had a great many interesting anecdotes to tell, which she placed with tact and which she did not repeat more than was pardonable.

Note that the phrasing of the sentence above was awkward if one desired a concise and witty stand-alone quotation. Over time multiple versions of the saying were advanced.

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Quote Origin: Your Manuscript Is Good and Original, But What is Original Is Not Good; What Is Good Is Not Original

Samuel Johnson? Martin Sherlock? Johann Heinrich Voss? Gotthold Ephraim Lessing? Richard Brinsley Sheridan? Daniel Webster? Samuel Wilberforce

Question for Quote Investigator: The great lexicographer Dr. Samuel Johnson is credited with a famously devastating remark about a book he was evaluating:

Your manuscript is both good and original; but the part that is good is not original, and the part that is original is not good.

I have never found a source for this quotation in the writings of Johnson, and I have become skeptical about this attribution. Do you know if he wrote this?

Reply from Quote Investigator: No substantive evidence has emerged to support the ascription to Samuel Johnson. In this article QI will trace the evolution of this saying and closely related expressions which have been attributed to a variety of prominent individuals. The following four statements have distinct meanings, but they can be clustered together semantically and syntactically.

What is new is not good; and what is good is not new.
What is new is not true; and what is true is not new.
What is original is not good; what is good is not original.
What is new is not valuable; what is valuable is not new.

The earliest evidence known to QI of a member of this cluster appeared in 1781 and was written by Reverend Martin Sherlock who was reviewing a popular collection of didactic letters published in book form. Lord Chesterfield composed the letters and sent them to his son with the goal of teaching him to become a man of the world and a gentleman. Sherlock was highly critical:¹

His principles of politeness are unexceptionable; and ought to be adopted by all young men of fashion; but they are known to every child in France; and are almost all translated from French books. In general, throughout the work, what is new is not good; and what is good is not new.

This expression was similar to the one attributed to Samuel Johnson. The word “new” was used instead of “original”. Yet, this passage did not include the humorous prefatory phrase which would have labeled the work “both new and good” before deflating it.

In the 1790s a German version of the saying using “new” and “true” was published in a collection by the translator and poet Johann Heinrich Voss. This instance did include a prefatory phrase stating that the “book teaches many things new and true”:²

Dein redseliges Buch lehrt mancherlei Neues und Wahres,
Wäre das Wahre nur neu, wäre das Neue nur wahr!

Here is an English translation:³

Your garrulous book teaches many things new and true,
If only the true were new, if only the new were true!

In 1800 a reviewer in “The British Critic” lambasted a book using a version of the brickbat with “new” and “good”:⁴

In this part there are some good and some new things; but the good are not new, and the new are not good. Much time is employed in considering the opinion of the poet du Belloy, at present forgotten and of little consequence, who professed to prefer the French to the ancient languages.

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