We’d All Like a Reputation for Generosity, and We’d All Like To Buy It Cheap

Mignon McLaughlin? Anonymous?

Dear Quote Investigator: December is a season of generosity for many, but the eagerness of participants varies. A friend recently joked that she wanted to achieve a reputation for generosity as cheaply as possible. She disclaimed authorship of this quip. Would you please explore its provenance?

Quote Investigator: The earliest match known to QI appeared in “The Neurotic’s Notebook” by Mignon McLaughlin in 1963. The compendium contained quips, adages, and observations such as the following two items:[ref] 1963, The Neurotic’s Notebook by Mignon McLaughlin, Chapter 9: Getting and Spending, Quote Page 82, The Bobbs-Merrill Company, Indianapolis, Indiana. (Verified with scans) [/ref]

We’d all like a reputation for generosity, and we’d all like to buy it cheap.

Life marks us all down, so it’s just as well that we start out by overpricing ourselves.

McLaughlin worked as a writer and editor at magazines such as “The Atlantic Monthly”, “Glamour”, and “Vogue” for decades from the 1940s to the 1970s. She was known for her witticisms.

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We Cannot Cure the World of Sorrows, But We Can Choose To Live in Joy

Joseph Campbell? Diane K. Osbon? Kurt Vonnegut? Apocryphal?

Dear Quote Investigator: When I watch the news I see endless reports signaling that the world is a mess. Efforts to mend the world are necessary and laudable; however, I am reminded of the advice given by mythology scholar Joseph Campbell. The world has always been a mess, and priority should be given to straightening out our own lives. Would you please help me to find a citation?

Quote Investigator: This guidance occurred in the 1991 book “Reflections on the Art of Living: A Joseph Campbell Companion” which consisted of material selected and edited by Diane K. Osbon. The following text appeared in a section titled “In the Field”, and Osbon stated that she had collected the words directly from Campbell. The section contained “favorite expressions of his, recorded in my journals over the years in his company”. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:[ref] 1991, Reflections on the Art of Living: A Joseph Campbell Companion, Selected and edited by Diane K. Osbon, Chapter: In the Field, Quote Page 8 and Page 17, HarperCollins, New York, New York. (Verified with hardcopy) [/ref]

We cannot cure the world of sorrows, but we can choose to live in joy.
When we talk about settling the world’s problems, we’re barking up the wrong tree.
The world is perfect. It’s a mess. It has always been a mess.
We are not going to change it.
Our job is to straighten out our own lives.

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Old Age Sure Ain’t for Sissies

Bette Davis? Ruth S. Hain? Malcolm Forbes? John S. Whelan? Paul Newman? Anonymous?

Dear Quote Investigator: One grows in wisdom as the decades accumulate, but the challenges to health and intellect also increase. Here are four versions of a spirited adage:

  • Old age is no place for sissies.
  • Getting old is not for sissies.
  • Aging is not for wimps.
  • Gettin’ old ain’t for wimps.

In this context, the words sissy and wimp refer to a weak or cowardly person. This adage has been credited to Academy Award winning actress Bette Davis. Would you please explore its provenance?

Quote Investigator: The earliest match located by QI appeared in the “Reader’s Digest” magazine of April 1968 within a section called “Life in These United States” which printed vignettes contributed by readers. A piece from Ruth S. Hain of Castro Valley, California described a group of elderly friends who gathered together and shared tales of arthritic joints and hardening arteries. Boldface added to excepts by QI:[ref] 1968 April, Reader’s Digest, Volume 92, Life in These United States, Start Page 81, Quote Page 82, Column 2, The Reader’s Digest Association, Pleasantville, New York. (Verified with microfilm) [/ref]

. . . one old gentleman detailed his stomach distress—all with considerable general comment. “Well, it just proves one thing, Hilda,” one woman finally said to her neighbor. “Old age sure ain’t for sissies.”

The guidelines published in “Reader’s Digest” state that vignettes submitted to the periodical “must be true, unpublished stories from your own experience”.[ref] 1968 April, Reader’s Digest, Volume 92, Have You An Amusing Anecdote—An Unusual Story?, Quote Page 12, Column 1, The Reader’s Digest Association, Pleasantville, New York. (Verified with microfilm) [/ref] QI conjectures that the punchline was crafted by the anonymous discussion participant above and popularized by Hain although it remains possible that Hain was recycling a pre-existing quip.

There is good evidence that Bette Davis owned a pillow with the slogan: Old Age Ain’t No Place for Sissies. Yet, the supporting citations appeared years after the saying was already in circulation. See further below for details.

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Serious-Minded People Have Few Ideas. People With Many Ideas Are Never Serious

Paul Valéry? Apocryphal?

Dear Quote Investigator: The following appeared as an epigraph to an article I saw recently:

Serious-minded people have few ideas. People with ideas are never serious.

The words were attributed to the French poet and commentator Paul Valéry. I am not sure precisely what the remark means. Would you please help me to find a citation for the original statement in French?

Quote Investigator: In 1942 Paul Valéry published “Mauvaises pensées et autres” (“Bad thoughts and others”) which contained a collection of short passages about a variety of topics. The following statement was included:[ref] 1960, Oeuvres de Paul Valéry, Volume 2, Édition Établie at Annotée par Jean Hytier, Section: Mauvaises pensées et autres (Bad thoughts and others), Quote Page 844, Bibliothèque de la Pléiade, Gallimard, Paris. (Verified with scans) [/ref]

Un homme sérieux a peu d’idées. Un homme à idées n’est jamais sérieux.

Here is one possible rendering into English:

Serious people have few ideas. People with ideas are never serious.

QI can only guess at the meaning. Perhaps the remark suggests that serious people offer few panaceas, and people who do offer panaceas should not be taken seriously.

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Taking Things with Gratitude, and Not Taking Things for Granted

G. K. Chesterton? Hugh Gesshugh? Anonymous?

Dear Quote Investigator: The Thanksgiving season reminds me of a notion that I have seen expressed in three different ways:

Instead of taking things for granted, we should take them with gratitude.

We must learn to take things with gratitude instead of taking them for granted.

When it comes to life the critical thing is whether you take things for granted or take them with gratitude.

This thought has been credited to the influential English writer and commentator to G. K. Chesterton, but I have been unable to find a citation. Would you please help?

Quote Investigator: “The Autobiography of G. K. Chesterton” appeared in 1936 which was the last year of the author’s life. He offered the following guidance to his readers. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:[ref] 1936, The Autobiography of G. K. Chesterton by G. K. Chesterton (Gilbert Keith Chesterton), Chapter 16: The God with the Golden Key, Quote Page 341 and 342, Sheed & Ward, New York. (Verified with scans) [/ref]

. . . I hope it is not pompous to call the chief idea of my life; I will not say the doctrine I have always taught, but the doctrine I should always have liked to teach. That is the idea of taking things with gratitude, and not taking things for granted.

A statement formatted as a straightforward injunction or a clear-cut aphorism facilitates transmission and radiation. The above statement fits neither of these two patterns. Thus, its dispersal in its original form has been hindered. Unsurprisingly, the phrasing has evolved during the ensuing decades.

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People Soon Get Tired of Staring at a Plywood Box Every Night

Darryl F. Zanuck? Anonymous Movie Mogul? Gabe Essoe? San Franciscan? Apocryphal?

Dear Quote Investigator: Movie industry people felt threatened by the advent of televised entertainment. Yet, early television consoles were expensive devices housed in bulky wooden cabinets with small screens that displayed only flickering black and white images. Apparently, a skeptical movie tycoon said:

People will soon get tired of staring at a plywood box.

I’ve seen this statement in compilations of bad predictions. Would you please explore the provenance of this expression?

Quote Investigator: The earliest match located by QI appeared in “The Wall Street Journal” in 1951. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:[ref] 1951 February 14, The Wall Street Journal, Movie Upturn: Attendance Is Gaining After Four-Year Drop, Theater Men Think, Quote Page 1, Column 6, New York. (ProQuest)[/ref]

What’s giving the movie men the most cause for joy is this: They think they are beginning to make a little headway in their battle with arch-rival TV.

“Video isn’t able to hold on to the market it captures after the first six months,” declares a New York movie mogul. “People soon get tired of staring at a plywood box every night,” claims a San Franciscan.

The passage above contains quotations from two different people. Oddly, later citations implausibly ascribed both statements to Darryl F. Zanuck, a powerful movie producer based in Hollywood, not New York.

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Courage Is Resistance To Fear, Mastery of Fear—Not Absence of Fear

Mark Twain? Apocryphal?

Dear Quote Investigator: Recently, I encountered an insightful quotation about courage attributed to Mark Twain that I had not seen before:

Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear, and not the absence of fear.

Is this a genuine Twain quotation? Where did it appear?

Quote Investigator: In December 1893 Mark Twain began to serialize the novel “Pudd’nhead Wilson” in “The Century Magazine”.[ref] 1894 March, The Century Magazine, Volume 47, Number 5, (Serialization begun in December 1893; target quotation appeared in March 1894), Section: Pudd’nhead Wilson by Mark Twain, Pudd’nhead Wilson’s Calendar, (epigraph at beginning of chapter 12), Quote Page 772, The Century Company, New York. (HathiTrust Full View) link [/ref] In 1894 he published the full work under the title “The Tragedy of Pudd’nhead Wilson and the Comedy Those Extraordinary Twins”. The twelfth chapter began with the following lengthy epigraph. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:[ref] 1894, The Tragedy of Pudd’nhead Wilson; And the Comedy Those Extraordinary Twins by Mark Twain (Samuel L. Clemens), Pudd’nhead Wilson’s Calendar, (Epigraph at beginning of chapter 12), Quote Page 155, American Publishing Company, New York. (HathiTrust Full View) link [/ref]

Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear—not absence of fear. Except a creature be part coward it is not a compliment to say it is brave; it is merely a loose misapplication of the word. Consider the flea!—incomparably the bravest of all the creatures of God, if ignorance of fear were courage.

Whether you are asleep or awake he will attack you, caring nothing for the fact that in bulk and strength you are to him as are the massed armies of the earth to a sucking child; he lives both day and night and all days and nights in the very lap of peril and the immediate presence of death, and yet is no more afraid than is the man who walks the streets of a city that was threatened by an earthquake ten centuries before.

When we speak of Clive, Nelson, and Putnam as men who “didn’t know what fear was,” we ought always to add the flea—and put him at the head of the procession.

—Pudd’nhead Wilson’s Calendar.

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Kurt Vonnegut Is a Laughing Prophet of Doom

Kurt Vonnegut? Larry L. King? Anonymous?

Dear Quote Investigator: The quotations and misquotations discussed on this website have typically been attributed to famous people. My inquiry is different. I would like you to explore a ubiquitous quotation describing a famous person. The prominent satirist and science fiction author Kurt Vonnegut has been called a laughing prophet of doom. I’ve seen this assessment emblazoned on several of Vonnegut’s books. What do you think?

Quote Investigator: In 1968 “The New York Times” published a review of a collection of short stories and essays by Kurt Vonnegut titled “Welcome to the Monkey House”. The reviewer was Larry L. King, a journalist, novelist, and playwright who later became well-known for co-creating the musical “The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas”. King was unimpressed with Vonnegut’s current effort, but he complimented the author’s previous work, Boldface added to excerpts by QI:[ref] 1968 September 1, The New York Times, Section: The New York Times Book Review, Old Soup by Larry L. King (Book review of “Welcome to the Monkey House” by Kurt Vonnegut Jr.), Quote Page BR4 and BR5, New York. (The original text misspelled “extensions” as “extentions”) (ProQuest) [/ref]

There are only brief glimpses of the hilarious, uproarious Vonnegut whose black-logic extensions of today’s absurdities into an imagined society of tomorrow at once gives us something to laugh at and much to fear.

At his wildest best (as in his earlier “God Bless You, Mr. Rosewater” or in “Cat’s Cradle”) Kurt Vonnegut is a laughing prophet of doom. Too much of this book—Vonnegut’s seventh—is slick, slapdash prose lifted from the pages of magazines of limited distinction.

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It’s Better To Be Quotable Than Honest

Tom Stoppard? Anonymous?

Dear Quote Investigator: The world of social media highlights upvotes, shares, and retweets. Many marketers, influencers, and politicians adhere to the following axiom:

It’s better to be quotable than honest.

Would you please explore the provenance of this expression?

Quote Investigator: British playwright Tom Stoppard has earned an Academy Award and four Tony Awards. In 1973 journalist Janet Watts interviewed Stoppard for the London newspaper “The Guardian”. She prompted him with a comment he had previously made during a television interview, and he responded with the quotation under examination.[ref] 1973 March 21, The Guardian, Tom Stoppard: Janet Watts interviews the playwright who has a work at the National Theatre, and a translation of Lorca opening tomorrow, Quote Page 12, Column 4, London, England. (Newspapers_com) [/ref]

Stoppard (a true ex-journalist) has a gift for quotable remarks. “I write fiction because it’s a way of making statements I can disown, and I write plays because dialogue is the most respectable way of contradicting myself,” he once said on television. He looks wry when reminded of it: “It seems pointless to be quoted if one isn’t going to be quotable . . . it’s better to be quotable than honest,” he says (doing it again).

Stoppard’s shrewd remark illustrates the principle it extols. Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.

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Humor Is One of the Most Serious Tools We Have for Dealing with Impossible Situations

Erica Jong? Apocryphal?
Dear Quote Investigator: Humor is a helpful tool for understanding and accepting events that are difficult to process emotionally such as divorce or death. I think the U.S. novelist Erica Jong made an observation similar to this. Would you please help me to locate her comment?

Quote Investigator: In 1984 Erica Jong sent a letter to “The New York Times Book Review” because she was unhappy with the recently published critique of her latest book. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:[ref] 1984 July 29, The New York Times, Section: The New York Times Book Review, Letters: Serious Humor by Erica Jong of Weston, Connecticut, Quote Page BR27, Column 2, New York. (ProQuest)[/ref]

In his review of my book, “Megan’s Book of Divorce” (July 1), Anthony Brandt makes a common mistake: that humor cannot be serious. On the contrary, humor is one of the most serious tools we have for dealing with impossible situations (like divorce).

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