Whoever First Ate an Oyster Was a Brave Soul

Jonathan Swift? Benjamin Franklin? Shirley Chisholm? Thomas Moffett? John Ward? King James I of England? Thomas Fuller? John Gay? Anonymous? Dear Quote Investigator: During a commencement address I heard the following vivid advice offered to students: Be as bold as the first man or woman to eat an oyster. Apparently, the famous Irish literary figure …

Universities Are Full of Knowledge; the Freshmen Bring a Little In and the Seniors Take None Away

Abbott Lawrence Lowell? Jonathan Swift? James Pycroft? University of Michigan Students? George Edgar Vincent? Arthur MacMurray? J. Brooks Atkinson? Charles William Eliot? Anonymous? Dear Quote Investigator: The people, laboratories, and libraries of a university embody a vast storehouse of knowledge. How did this knowledge accumulate? A humorous response to this question has often been attributed …

You Yourself May Serve To Show It, That Every Fool Is Not a Poet

Jonathan Swift? Samuel Taylor Coleridge? Alexander Pope? Théophile de Viau? Matthew Prior? Pierre de Ronsard? Scévole de Sainte-Marthe? Anonymous? Dear Quote Investigator: According to legend a famous literary figure was accosted by a philistine who exclaimed that all poets were fools. The adroit spontaneous response provided a humorous comeuppance: Sir, I admit your general rule, …

You Cannot Reason People Out of Something They Were Not Reasoned Into

Jonathan Swift? Fisher Ames? Lyman Beecher? Jonathan Farr? Samuel Hanson Cox? Sydney Smith? Sidney Smith? Ben Goldacre? Dear Quote Investigator: Jonathan Swift was a prominent literary figure who authored “Gulliver’s Travels” and “A Modest Proposal”. He has been credited with an elegant thought about the limitations of persuasion via logical argument: You cannot reason someone …

Government Is Like Fire, a Dangerous Servant and a Fearful Master

George Washington? John Tillotson? Jonathan Swift? James Fenimore Cooper? Frederick Uttley Laycock? Robert Heinlein? Apocryphal? Dear Quote Investigator: A cautionary statement about statecraft has often been attributed to George Washington. Here are three versions: 1) Government is like fire, a dangerous servant and a fearful master. 2) Government, like fire, is a troublesome servant and …

A Lie Can Travel Halfway Around the World While the Truth Is Putting On Its Shoes

Mark Twain? Jonathan Swift? Thomas Francklin? Fisher Ames? Thomas Jefferson? John Randolph? Charles Haddon Spurgeon? Winston Churchill? Terry Pratchett? Anonymous? Dear Quote Investigator: An insightful remark about the rapid transmission of lies is often attributed to Mark Twain. Here are two versions: (1) A lie travels around the globe while the truth is putting on its …

He Who Would Pun Would Pick a Pocket

Alexander Pope? Samuel Johnson? Jonathan Swift? John Dennis? Anonymous? Dear Quote Investigator: I have heard several versions of a quotation that is beloved by people who dislike puns: (1) He who would make a pun would pick a pocket. (2) A man who will pun, will pick a pocket. (3) A man who could make …