An Acre of Performance Is Worth the Whole Land of Promise

William Dean Howells? James Howell? Red Auerbach? Anonymous?

Dear Quote Investigator: Promises are easy to make and easy to break. Only actual conduct and achievements produce a reliable record of behavior. A popular figurative statement succinctly expresses this idea:

An acre of performance is worth a whole world of promise.

These words have been attributed to the prominent literary figure William Dean Howells and the famous basketball coach Red Auerbach. Would you please explore its provenance?

Quote Investigator: The earliest strong match located by QI appeared long before William Dean Howells and Red Auerbach were born. The British historian James Howell employed the saying in a letter he sent to a correspondent in Antwerp that was published in a 1655 collection. Emphasis added to excerpts by QI:[ref] 1655, Epistolae Ho-Elianae: A Fourth Volume of Familiar Letters Upon Various Emergent Occasions Partly Philosophical, Political, Historical by James Howell (Clerk of the Councell to his late Majestie, Letter: 33, From: James Howell, To: Mr. R. Lee in Antwerp, Location: London, Date: November 9, Quote Page 75, Printed for Humphrey Moseley, London. (Google Books Full View) link [/ref]

An acre of performance is worth the whole Land of promise; Besides, as the Italian hath it, Deeds are men, and words women: you pleas’d to promise me when you shook hands with England to barter Letters with me; But wheras I writ to you a good while since by Mr. Simons, I have not receiv’d syllable from you ever since.

Howell used the poetically resonant phrase “Land of promise” instead of the prosaic “world of promise”. He also included a sexist adage.

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Adage Origin: Three Stages of Acceptance: (1) It Is Not True. (2) It Is Contrary To Religion. (3) Everyone Knew It Before

Louis Agassiz? William Boyd Dawkins? Charles Lyell? Anonymous?

Question for Quote Investigator: Groundbreaking ideas face an intimidating multistage gauntlet of resistance. Several popular quotations elaborate on this notion. The prominent Swiss-American geologist and biologist Louis Agassiz apparently crafted a pungent and humorous saying that outlined three stages. Would you please examine that quotation?

Reply from Quote Investigator: Researchers have not yet found an expression of this type directly in the writings of Louis Agassiz who died in 1873. Nevertheless, he has often received credit for the thought. For example, the geologist and archaeologist William Boyd Dawkins presented a paper about hyena dens to the Somersetshire Archaeological and Natural History Society in England that appeared in the 1861-1862 proceedings.

At that time scientists were debating the age of the human race, and evidence suggested that humankind had resided on planet Earth much longer than six thousand years. Yet, some thinkers resisted the hypothesis of human antiquity. In the following passage Dawkins referred to a remark he ascribed to Agassiz. Emphasis added to excerpts by QI:1

And this startling result of the combination of geology with archaeology, so unexpected, and so completely subversive of our pre-conceived notions, having met with, during the last fifty years, two out of the three inevitable objections which, according to Professor Agassiz, all new and startling facts in science must encounter, first, “that it is not true,” and secondly, “that it is contrary to religion,” has now happily arrived at the stage in which people say “everyone knew it before.”

In 1863 the famous geologist Sir Charles Lyell published “The Geological Evidences of the Antiquity of Man”. Lyell placed the statement he ascribed to Agassiz between quotation marks, but he did not give a citation:2

I may conclude this chapter by quoting a saying of Professor Agassiz, “that whenever a new and startling fact is brought to light in science, people first say, ‘it is not true,’ then that ‘it is contrary to religion,’ and lastly, ‘that everybody knew it before.'”

A separate QI article located here discusses the following related expression: “Three Stages of Discovery: First, They Deny It Is True; Second, They Deny It Is Important; Third, They Deny It Is New”.

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The Man Who Dares To Tell the Truth Is Called at Once a Lunatic and Fool

Plato? George Francis Train? Anonymous?

Dear Quote Investigator: Truth tellers often face an unhappy fate in cautionary fables. They are derided, misunderstood, persecuted, or ignored. The famous ancient philosopher Plato supposedly said:

The young and old are taught falsehoods. The person who dares to tell the truth is called at once a lunatic and fool.

I have not been able to locate a solid citation. Would you please help?

Quote Investigator: Researchers have found no substantive evidence that Plato made this remark. The earliest close match known to QI appeared in the 1871 book “Pen Sketches of Nebraskans” by A. C. Edmunds. An eccentric American railroad financier, presidential aspirant, and world traveler named George Francis Train received credit for the following. Emphasis added to excerpts by QI:[ref] 1871, Pen Sketches of Nebraskans with Photographs by A. C. Edmunds, George Francis Train: The Man of Destiny, Start Page 5, Quote Page 5, R. & J. Wilbur, Lincoln, Nebraska. (Google Books Full View) link [/ref]

Strange times are these, in which we live, forsooth; When young and old are taught in Falsehood’s school:—And the man who dares to tell the truth, Is called at once a lunatic and fool.

The statement was an epigraph to a profile titled “George Francis Train: The Man of Destiny”. In 1872 Train campaigned to become President of the United States, and a collection of his speeches was published under the title “The People’s Candidate for President, 1872”. According to this work Train caused a sensation when he spoke the quotation:[ref] 1872, The People’s Candidate for President, 1872, George Francis Train, (Collection of speeches by George Francis Train), Edited by John Wesley Nichols, Quote Page 44, Publisher not identified. (Google Books Full View) link [/ref]

You want sobriety, industry and morality in the exemplification of the character of your public men. I challenge an accusation against myself. [Applause.]

Strange times are those in which we live, forsooth,
When old and young are taught in falsehood’s school,
And the one man that dares to tell the truth
Is called at once a lunatic and fool.
(Sensation.)

The phrasing was slightly different in these two instances, e.g., the 1871 version contained “young and old”, whereas the 1872 version contained “old and young”.

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I Do Most of My Work Sitting Down. That’s Where I Shine

Robert Benchley? James G. Berrien? Anonymous?

Dear Quote Investigator: Some regions of garments develop a shiny appearance when fibers are repeatedly compressed. Hence, the seats of pants sometimes become shiny. A few fabrics are particularly susceptible to this problem; in the past, blue serge suits were well-known for becoming undesirably shiny. The verb ‘to shine’ also has an alternative meaning: ‘to excel’. The popular humorist and actor Robert Benchley crafted a clever apposite joke:

I do most of my writing sitting down. That’s where I shine.

Should Benchley really receive credit?

Quote Investigator: In October 1942 the widely-distributed Sunday newspaper supplement “This Week Magazine” published a profile with the title “He Works Sitting Down” and the subtititle “And that’s where Robert Benchley shines” by Irving Wallace. Thus, Benchley’s quip was built into the header of the article. It was also repeated in the article body. Emphasis added to excerpts by QI:[ref] 1942 October 4, The Los Angeles Times, Section: This Week Magazine, He Works Sitting Down And that’s where Robert Benchley shines by Irving Wallace, Start Page 10, Quote Page 11, Column 2, Los Angeles, California. (Newspapers_com)[/ref]

But Benchley won’t forget his gags, either. He can’t stay away from humor.
“I shouldn’t complain,” he says with one of these apologetic chuckles. “After all, I do most of my work sitting down. That’s where I shine.”

QI believes that Benchley should receive credit for this formulation using sharp wordplay; however, amusing precursors were circulating by the 1920s.

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A Little Nonsense Now and Then is Relished by the Wisest Men

Roald Dahl? Willy Wonka? Gene Wilder? Horace? Lord Byron? Horace Walpole? Hudibras? Samuel Butler? Anonymous?

Dear Quote Investigator: The 1971 film “Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory” was an extraordinary confection. The candy-maker Wonka played by Gene Wilder used numerous literary quotations while leading a tour of his factory. One scene took place in a room with geese that produced enormous golden eggs of chocolate. Each egg was analyzed by an “eggdicator” to determine whether it was a good egg or a bad egg. One parent on the tour considered the situation ridiculous, and Wonka replied to his skepticism with a quotation:[ref] 1971, Movie: Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory, Screenplay by Roald Dahl, Based on “Charlie and the Chocolate Factory” by Roald Dahl, Released by Paramount Pictures, Quote Location: 1 hour 20 minutes of 1 hour 39 minutes. (Amazon Video)[/ref]

Grandpa Joe: It’s an educated eggdicator.
Henry Salt: It’s a lot of nonsense.
Willy Wonka: A little nonsense now and then is relished by the wisest men.

Would you please trace this saying?

Quote Investigator: The popular English author Roald Dahl published the children’s book “Charlie and the Chocolate Factory” in 1964. Dahl also wrote the screenplay for “Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory” based on his book. The line spoken by Wonka in the movie is not in the 1964 book, but Dahl included it in the 1972 sequel called “Charlie and the Great Glass Elevator”.

The earliest strong match known to QI appeared in the newspaper “The New-York Mirror” in 1823. The reviewer of a new melodrama called “Undine, or the Spirit of the Waters” did not consider it a serious work, but he enjoyed it and recommended it. Emphasis added to excerpts by QI:[ref] 1823 December 6, The New-York Mirror, and Ladies’ Literary Gazette, The Drama: Undine, Quote Page 151, Column 1, Published by George P. Morris, New York. (Google Books Full View) link [/ref]

As a drama, it is not of the family of legitimates; but what then, who has not experienced the truth of that good old couplet, that

“A little nonsense, now and then,
Is relished by the wisest men!”

The reviewer disclaimed credit for the expression by labelling it an “old couplet”; hence, earlier citations probably exist. Nevertheless, quotation expert Nigel Rees deserves kudos for placing this valuable instance in his compilation “The Best Guide to Humorous Quotations”.[ref] 2011, The Best Guide to Humorous Quotations by Nigel Rees, (Updated, expanded, and revised version of “Cassell’s Humorous Quotations”, 2003), Publication Date: September 6, 2011, Topic: Nonsense, Kindle Location: 14964, Sold by: Amazon Digital Services LLC. (Kindle Ebook)[/ref]

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Do All the Good You Can; In All the Ways You Can

John Wesley? Nicholas Murray? Laban Clark? Kirwan? Dwight L. Moody? Tombstone in Shrewsbury? Anonymous?

Dear Quote Investigator: John Wesley was a prominent English religious figure whose teachings inspired Methodism. The following elaborate injunction is sometimes called “John Wesley’s Rule of Life”:

Do all the good you can,
By all the means you can,
In all the ways you can,
In all the places you can,
At all the times you can,
To all the people you can,
As long as ever you can.

Would you please explore the provenance of this multipart expression?

Quote Investigator: Researchers have been unable to find these precise words in the oeuvre of John Wesley who died in 1791; however, there is evidence that he delivered sermons containing passages providing a partial match.

The 1799 work “Sermons on Several Occasions” by Reverend John Wesley contained a homily on “The Law Established through Faith” with the following guidance. Emphasis in excerpts added by QI:[ref] 1799, Sermons on Several Occasions (A New Edition) by the Rev. John Wesley (Late Fellow of Lincoln College, Oxford), Sermon 36: The Law Established through Faith: Discourse 2, Start Page 478, Quote Page 486, Printed by Edward Baines; Sold by T. Hannam, The Preachers in the New Itinerancy, and the Booksellers, Leeds, England. (Google Books Full View) link [/ref]

Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. Neither is love content with barely working no evil to our neighbour. It continually incites us to do good: as we have time, and opportunity, to do good in every possible kind, and in every possible degree to all men.

The collection also contained a sermon on “The Use of Money” by Wesley with the following instructions:[ref] 1799, Sermons on Several Occasions (A New Edition) by the Rev. John Wesley (Late Fellow of Lincoln College, Oxford), Sermon 50: The Use of Money, Start Page 662, Quote Page 675, Printed by Edward Baines; Sold by T. Hannam, The Preachers in the New Itinerancy, and the Booksellers, Leeds, England. (Google Books Full View) link [/ref]

No more waste! Cut off every expence which fashion, caprice, or flesh and blood demand. No more covetousness! But employ whatever God has intrusted you with, in doing good, all possible good, in every possible kind and degree, to the household of faith, to all men.

The earliest strong match located by QI appeared in the 1852 book “The Riches that Bring No Sorrow” by Erskine Neale who used a footnote to ascribe the words to someone named Dr. Murray:[ref] 1852, The Riches that Bring No Sorrow by The Rev. Erskine Neale, Chapter 6: Cavendish—The Philosopher, Quote Page 110, Longman, Brown, Green, and Longmans, London. (Google Books Full View) link [/ref]

And one—the most legitimate—inference from the Sacred Volume was systematically overlooked: “Do all the good you can; in all the ways you can; to all the people you can; and just as long as you can.”

†Dr. Murray.

An 1868 citation given further below indicated that an American Presbyterian clergyman Nicholas Murray employed a version of the statement above, and this person might be the Murray referenced; however, Murray credited an unnamed ninety-one year old man.

QI believes that the excerpt above may have evolved from Wesley’s words. Admittedly, the components of this excerpt have a parallel structure that makes it more interesting and memorable than Wesley’s version.

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Write Drunk, Revise Sober

Ernest Hemingway? Gowan McGland? Dylan Thomas? Peter De Vries? F. Scott Fitzgerald? James Joyce? Stephen Fry? Anonymous?

Dear Quote Investigator: “Alcohol loosens the tongue” is an old saying that some authors treat with reverence. But the resultant lubricated poetry and prose may require a red pencil. The famous writer Ernest Hemingway reportedly made one of the following remarks:

  1. Write drunk, edit sober.
  2. Write drunk, revise sober.

I cannot find a solid citation. What do you think?

Quote Investigator: Researchers have been unable to find this saying in the output of Ernest Hemingway who died in 1961, and it is unlikely that he ever said it or wrote it.

The earliest strong match known to QI appeared in the 1964 novel “Reuben, Reuben” by the humorist Peter De Vries which included a character named Gowan McGland whose behaviors and eccentricities were partially modeled on the celebrated Welsh poet Dylan Thomas.

At the beginning of chapter twenty-one McGland was reviewing a previously written draft of a poem. Now that he was sober he excised two lines that he considered dreadful. Emphasis added to excerpts by QI:[ref] 1964, Reuben, Reuben by Peter De Vries, Chapter 21, Quote Page 242, Chapter 30, Published by Little, Brown and Company, Boston, Massachusetts. (Verified on paper)[/ref]

He remembered something he had told a New York journalist in an interview about his “working habits,” a dull subject about which people remained curiously interested in the case of writers and artists. “Sometimes I write drunk and revise sober,” he had said, “and sometimes I write sober and revise drunk. But you have to have both elements in creation — the Apollonian and the Dionysian, or spontaneity and restraint, emotion and discipline.”

QI conjectures that the words of De Vries evolved and were reassigned to the more prominent Hemingway who was certainly known to take a drink.

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Every Word She Writes Is a Lie, Including “And” and “The”

Mary McCarthy? Lillian Hellman? Apocryphal?

Dear Quote Investigator: The funniest caustic condemnation of a prevaricator that I have ever heard was delivered by the novelist and critic Mary McCarthy. The result was a multi-million dollar defamation lawsuit filed by the famous playwright Lillian Hellman who was the target of the criticism. Would you please examine precisely what was spoken?

Quote Investigator: In 1978 a journalist named Joan Dupont interviewed Mary McCarthy for a short-lived English-language periodical called “Paris Metro”. Dupont explored the topic of rivalry between women intellectuals and asked McCarthy’s opinion of the political philosopher Hannah Arendt. McCarthy said she greatly admired Arendt and felt no competitiveness toward her. When Dupont asked McCarthy about the playwright Lillian Hellman the response given with a smile was savage and comically hyperbolic. Emphasis added to excerpts by QI:[ref] 1991, Conversations with Mary McCarthy, Edited by Carol Gelderman, (Collection of Mary McCarthy interviews from miscellaneous publications), Series: Literary Conversations Series, Chapter: Mary McCarthy: Portrait of a Lady, Author/Interviewer: Joan Dupont, (Reprinted from February 15, 1978 issue of The Paris Metro), Start Page 157, Quote Page 164, University Press of Mississippi, Jackson, Mississippi. (Verified on paper)[/ref]

“I can’t stand her. I think every word she writes is false, including ‘and’ and ‘but.'” Her steady smile has grown into a full grin.

This version of McCarthy’s comment is not well-known because “Paris Metro” did not circulate widely. But McCarthy decided to reuse her bon mot in October 1979 during her appearance on a public television talk show hosted by Dick Cavett. When Cavett asked her to name overrated authors she referred to Hellman, and she attempted to recall her previous quip. She produced an altered remark that achieved wide distribution:[ref] 2000, Seeing Mary Plain: A Life of Mary McCarthy by Frances Kiernan, Chapter 25: The Hellman Suit, Quote Page 673, W. W. Norton & Company, New York. (Verified on paper)[/ref]

FROM THE TRANSCRIPT OF THE DICK CAVETT SHOW,
OCTOBER 18, 1979, TAPING

MCCARTHY: The only one I can think of is a holdover like Lillian Hellman, who I think is tremendously overrated, a bad writer, and dishonest writer, but she really belongs to the past, to the Steinbeck past, not that she is a writer like Steinbeck

CAVETT: What is dishonest about her?

MCCARTHY: Everything. But I said once in some interview that every word she writes is a lie, including “and” and “the.”

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In The Zone

Arthur Ashe? Anonymous?

Dear Quote Investigator: While engaging in a difficult physical or mental task one sometimes achieves a state of sublime concentration that enables remarkable performance. Athletes employ the following phrase to describe this ideal status:

In The Zone

Would you please explore the origin of this expression?

Quote Investigator: During 1973 and 1974 the top tennis player Arthur Ashe kept an audio diary, and in 1975 he published “Arthur Ashe: Portrait in Motion” primarily based on his daily recordings. The earliest evidence of the phrase located by QI appeared in a diary entry dated February 22, 1974 in which he discussed a match with another prominent player named Bjorn Borg. Emphasis added to excerpts by QI:[ref] 1976 (1975 Copyright), Arthur Ashe: Portrait in Motion by Arthur Ashe with Frank Deford, Chapter 16: Playing Europe and the Zone, Diary Entry for February 22, 1974, Quote Page 201, Ballantine Books, New York. (Originally published in 1975; verified with scans of 1976 paperback edition)[/ref]

I thought I was playing unconscious, but Borg beat me 6-4, 7-6 tonight, and he is in what we call the zone. (That comes originally from “twilight zone” and translates, more or less, into “another world.”) The kid has no concept of what he is doing out there—he is just swinging away and the balls are dropping in. He has no respect for anybody. Hell, he should win the whole tournament.

The award-winning original television series “The Twilight Zone” ran from 1959 to 1964 and featured supernatural and science-fictional plot elements. Thus, the figurative underpinnings of “in the zone” suggested magical or mystical superhuman powers acquired for a temporary period.

Ashe was the central locus for the popularization of the phrase. It was possible that the saying emerged from a group discussion in which Ashe participated; hence, he used the word “we” in the passage above. Alternatively, it was crafted by an unknown person, and Ashe quickly learned about its meaning and its connection to the television series.

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If All the Economists Were Laid End to End, They Would Not Reach a Conclusion

George Bernard Shaw? Farmer Brown? Isaac Marcosson? Stephen Leacock? Anonymous?

Dear Quote Investigator: The advice offered by economists is often equivocal and hedged. The famous playwright and witty social critic George Bernard Shaw reportedly crafted the following lament:

If all the economists were laid end to end, they would not reach a conclusion.

I have been unable to find a solid citation. Would you please examine this topic?

Quote Investigator: “The Saturday Review of Literature” credited George Bernard Shaw with the expression above in May 1933, but the saying had entered circulation by July 1932 without an attribution. In addition, intriguing precursors appeared by the 1920s. Hence, the ascription to Shaw is currently uncertain.

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