Making Love As Though We’re an Endangered Species

Peter De Vries? Laurence J. Peter? Apocryphal? Question for Quote Investigator: Do you know who is responsible for crafting the following vivid and humorous simile?: They made love as though they were an endangered species. Is this the correct phrasing? I do not know whether such lovemaking would be celebratory, frenetic, fatalistic, or hopeless. Reply …

Art Is a Lie That Makes Us Realize Truth

Pablo Picasso? Jean Cocteau? Dorothy Allison? Henry A. Murray? Peter De Vries? Albert Camus? Julie Burchill? Apocryphal? Dear Quote Investigator: Art works such as novels, paintings, and sculptures embody a stylized and distorted representation of the world. Yet, deep truths can best be expressed by deviating from the straitjacket of verisimilitude. Here are four versions …

Write Drunk, Revise Sober

Ernest Hemingway? Gowan McGland? Dylan Thomas? Peter De Vries? F. Scott Fitzgerald? James Joyce? Stephen Fry? Anonymous? Dear Quote Investigator: “Alcohol loosens the tongue” is an old saying that some authors treat with reverence. But the resultant lubricated poetry and prose may require a red pencil. The famous writer Ernest Hemingway reportedly made one of …

What I Hate About Writing Is the Paperwork

Peter De Vries? Apocryphal? Dear Quote Investigator: There is an amusing quip that is perfect for National Novel Writing Month. Here are two versions: 1) I love being a writer. What I can’t stand is the paperwork. 2) Writing: I like everything about it but the paperwork. This comment has been attributed to the novelist, …

I Only Write When Inspiration Strikes. Fortunately It Strikes at Nine Every Morning

William Faulkner? Peter De Vries? Herman Wouk? W. Somerset Maugham? Jane Yolen? Raymond Chandler? Anonymous? Dear Quote Investigator: As a writer I find the following quotation about motivation both amusing and invigorating: I write when I’m inspired, and I see to it that I’m inspired at nine o’clock every morning. I have seen these words …

Nostalgia Is Not What It Used To Be

Yogi Berra? Simone Signoret? Peter De Vries? Tommy Handley & Ronald Frankau? Anonymous? Dear Quote Investigator: Holidays sometimes make me nostalgic. They also remind me of the following clever quip: Nostalgia ain’t what it used to be. These words are often attributed to the famed baseball quotemaster Yogi Berra, but recently I learned of an …

A Story Should Have a Beginning, a Muddle and an End

Peter De Vries? Philip Larkin? C. E. Lombardi? Larry Gelbart? Avi’s Young Reader? Anonymous? Dear Quote Investigator: When faced with the difficult task of writing effectively some people insist on a guaranteed formula. As a confirmed scribbler I am convinced that there is no formula, but I laughed when I heard this: A story consists …

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