We Should Utilize Natural Forces and Thus Get All of Our Power. Sunshine Is a Form of Energy, and the Winds and the Tides Are Manifestations of Energy

Thomas Edison? Elbert Hubbard? Apocryphal?

Dear Quote Investigator: The famous inventor Thomas Edison supposedly foresaw the potential of solar energy more than one hundred years ago. He wanted to replace the burning of fuels with the collection of natural energy from the sun, wind, and tides.

Did Edison really express this viewpoint? Would you please explore this topic?

Quote Investigator: In 1910 influential publisher Elbert Hubbard printed an interview with Thomas Edison in his journal “The Fra”. Edison believed that burning wood and coal was shortsighted, and he was excited by a vision of collecting and storing what is now called renewable energy. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:[1]1910 April, The Fra: A Journal of Affirmation, Volume 5, Number 1, The Open Road: Afoot With The Fra, Thomas A. Edison, Start Page 1, Quote Page 6 and 7, Published by Elbert Hubbard, East Aurora, … Continue reading

This scheme of combustion in order to get power makes me sick to think of—it is so wasteful. It is just the old, foolish Prometheus idea, and the father of Prometheus was a baboon.

“When we learn how to store electricity, we will cease being apes ourselves; until then we are tailless orang-outangs. You see, we should utilize natural forces and thus get all of our power. Sunshine is a form of energy, and the winds and the tides are manifestations of energy. Do we use them?

“Oh, no; we burn up wood and coal, as renters burn up the front fence for fuel. We live like squatters, not as if we owned the property.

“There must surely come a time when heat and power will be stored in unlimited quantities in every community, all gathered by natural forces. Electricity ought to be as cheap as oxygen, for it can not be destroyed.

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References

References
↑1 1910 April, The Fra: A Journal of Affirmation, Volume 5, Number 1, The Open Road: Afoot With The Fra, Thomas A. Edison, Start Page 1, Quote Page 6 and 7, Published by Elbert Hubbard, East Aurora, Erie County, New York. (HathiTrust Full View) link

“Is Your New Baby a Boy Or a Girl?” “Yes”

Bertrand Russell? Leo Rosten? Apocryphal? Anonymous?

Dear Quote Investigator: The prominent British philosopher and essayist Bertrand Russell co-wrote an important book of classical logic titled “Principia Mathematica”. An anecdote about Russell is based on a humorously rigorous logical interpretation of a question. A colleague spoke to Russell shortly after his wife had a baby:

“Congratulations. Is it a girl or a boy?”
“Certainly.”

Do you think this story is genuine or apocryphal?

Quote Investigator: QI believes that this anecdote is apocryphal; however, it was probably derived from a passage that appeared in Bertrand Russell’s 1940 book “An Inquiry Into Meaning And Truth” which discussed the interpretation of logical disjunction. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:[1]1940 (1956 Fifth Impression), An Inquiry Into Meaning And Truth by Bertrand Russell, The William James Lectures for 1940 Delivered at Harvard University, Chapter 5: Logical Words, Quote Page 85 and … Continue reading

The following conversation might occur between a medical logician and his wife. “Has Mrs. So-and-So had her child?” “Yes.” “Is it a boy or a girl?” “Yes.” The last answer, though logically impeccable, would be infuriating.

The answerer would normally understand that the questioner wished to know the sex of the child. Instead, the answerer unhelpfully indicated that the sex of the child fell within the set {male, female}. Nowadays, there is greater awareness of intersex children, so the interpretation of this scenario would be more complex.

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References

References
↑1 1940 (1956 Fifth Impression), An Inquiry Into Meaning And Truth by Bertrand Russell, The William James Lectures for 1940 Delivered at Harvard University, Chapter 5: Logical Words, Quote Page 85 and 86, George Allen and Unwin Ltd, London. (Verified with scans)

Chess: As Elaborate a Waste of Human Intelligence as You Could Find Anywhere Outside an Advertising Agency

Raymond Chandler? Philip Marlowe? Apocryphal?

Dear Quote Investigator: A famous writer of detective novels apparently described chess as an enormous waste of human intelligence. My memory is not precise. He may have been talking about poker instead of chess. Would you please explore this topic?

Quote Investigator: Raymond Chandler’s 1953 novel “The Long Goodbye” contained a scene in which the protagonist detective Philip Marlowe set up a chessboard to reenact a memorable game from a past tournament. The exercise was a form of relaxation and contemplation for Marlowe, and the context showed that the iconic gumshoe viewed chess favorably. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:[1] 1953 Copyright (1971 Reprint), The Long Goodbye by Raymond Chandler, Chapter 24, Quote Page 153, Ballantine Books, New York. (Verified with scans)

. . . played a championship tournament game between Gortchakoff and Meninkin, seventy-two moves to a draw, a prize specimen of the irresistible force meeting the immovable object, a battle without armor, a war without blood, and as elaborate a waste of human intelligence as you could find anywhere outside an advertising agency.

QI has not yet located evidence that this game was played in the veridical world. The two chess masters apparently were fictional.

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Continue reading “Chess: As Elaborate a Waste of Human Intelligence as You Could Find Anywhere Outside an Advertising Agency”

References

References
↑1 1953 Copyright (1971 Reprint), The Long Goodbye by Raymond Chandler, Chapter 24, Quote Page 153, Ballantine Books, New York. (Verified with scans)

A Baby Learns To Speak in Two Years, But It Takes a Lifetime To Learn To Keep Quiet

Ernest Hemingway? Mark Twain? Luke McLuke? Lydia DeVilbiss? Oliver Wendell Holmes Sr.? Oliver Wendell Holmes Jr.? Frederick B. Wilcox? Abigail Van Buren? Anonymous?

Dear Quote Investigator: While searching the twitter database I encountered the following two similar jokes:

(1) Humans need two years to learn to speak and sixty years to learn to shut up.

(2) It takes two years to learn to talk, and the rest of your life to control your mouth.

Ernest Hemingway received credit for the first, and Mark Twain received credit for the second. I am skeptical of both of these ascriptions. Would you please explore this topic?

Quote Investigator: QI has found no substantive evidence that either of these famous quotation magnets employed this quip. The expression is highly variable which makes this large family of quips difficult to trace, and this article will only present a snapshot of current research.

The earliest match located by QI appeared in a 1909 editorial published in a Wenatchee, Washington newspaper. The context indicated that the quip was already in circulation; hence, the ascription was anonymous. The word “exuberance” was misspelled as “exhuberance”:[1] 1909 October 13, The Wenatchee Daily World, A Diplomat Must Be Discreet, Quote Page 4, Column 1, Wenatchee, Washington. (Newspapers_com)

It is unfortunate that Charles R. Crane, who was recently designated as minister to China should have been led by an exhuberance of enthusiasm and interest in Oriental affairs to make remarks which might prove embarrassing to the administration. His indiscretion gives emphasis to the remark that it takes a person two years to learn how to talk and all the rest of his life to learn to keep from talking too much.

Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.

Continue reading “A Baby Learns To Speak in Two Years, But It Takes a Lifetime To Learn To Keep Quiet”

References

References
↑1 1909 October 13, The Wenatchee Daily World, A Diplomat Must Be Discreet, Quote Page 4, Column 1, Wenatchee, Washington. (Newspapers_com)

An Intellectual Is Someone Who Has Found Something More Interesting Than Sex

Aldous Huxley? Katharine Whitehorn? Edgar Wallace? Anonymous?

Dear Quote Investigator: A widely reported psychological study asserted that people experienced erotic thoughts many times a day on average. Intellectuals, according to a comical definition, are able to free their minds sufficiently from carnal pursuits to consider other subjects of superior interest. The well-known author of “Brave New World”, Aldous Huxley, made a quip of this type. Would you please explore this topic?

Quote Investigator: The earliest close match located by QI appeared in “The Observer” newspaper of London in 1968. The influential columnist Katharine Whitehorn attributed the remark to Aldous Huxley. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:[1] 1968 March 3, The Observer, Yer silly old moos by Katharine Whitehorn, Quote Page 27, Column 7, London, Greater London, England. (Newspapers_com)

You can attack synthetic sex or premature sex or mass-media sex; but if anyone made a remark like Huxley’s ‘An intellectual is someone who has found something more interesting than sex’ it would nowadays be taken automatically as a defence.

This ascription occurred after Huxley’s death in 1963, and no evidence has yet emerged that Huxley actually made this remark. QI conjectures that this quip evolved from a comment made by thriller writer Edgar Wallace during an interview with “The New York Times” in January 1932:[2] 1932 January 24, The New York Times, Edgar Wallace Enjoys Hollywood, Quote Page X6, Column 4, New York. (ProQuest)

“The highbrows tell me that my writing is not literature, and I retort that literature is too often unintelligible. What is a highbrow? He is a man who has found something more interesting than women. When I get that way I’ll stop writing and take to art.

The phrase “found something more interesting than” was shared between the two remarks. In addition, similar comments have been made using the terms “highbrow”, “egghead”, and “intellectual”. The joke evolved from a stance of gynephilia in 1932 toward a general stance in 1968. Whitehorn may have misremembered Wallace’s quotation. Alternatively, she heard and repeated a transformed remark already in circulation.

Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.

Continue reading “An Intellectual Is Someone Who Has Found Something More Interesting Than Sex”

References

References
↑1 1968 March 3, The Observer, Yer silly old moos by Katharine Whitehorn, Quote Page 27, Column 7, London, Greater London, England. (Newspapers_com)
↑2 1932 January 24, The New York Times, Edgar Wallace Enjoys Hollywood, Quote Page X6, Column 4, New York. (ProQuest)

What Is a Highbrow? He Is a Man Who Has Found Something More Interesting Than Women

Edgar Wallace? Aldous Huxley? Paul Larmer? Russell Lynes? Katharine Whitehorn? Wayne C. Booth? Anonymous?

Dear Quote Investigator: Human thoughts are often focused on relationships and intimacy. Yet, other cerebral pursuits may predominate when the mind shifts focus. Here are three closely related versions of a humorous definition:

  • A highbrow is a person who has found something more interesting than women.
  • Egghead: a guy who’s found something more interesting than women.
  • An intellectual is someone who has found something more interesting than sex.

The first two versions are presented from a stance of gynephilia. The third is more general. This quip has been attributed to the popular and prolific English thriller writer Edgar Wallace. Would you please explore this topic?

Quote Investigator: The first match known to QI appeared in “The New York Times” in January 1932. A journalist interviewed Edgar Wallace and asked him about his prodigious output of stories. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:[1] 1932 January 24, The New York Times, Edgar Wallace Enjoys Hollywood, Quote Page X6, Column 4, New York. (ProQuest)

Mr. Wallace insists there is no mystery about his quick writing. “I’m a newspaper man, and in the hard training of a newspaper office I have learned to marshal my thoughts and give them terse expression.

“The highbrows tell me that my writing is not literature, and I retort that literature is too often unintelligible. What is a highbrow? He is a man who has found something more interesting than women. When I get that way I’ll stop writing and take to art.

Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.

Continue reading “What Is a Highbrow? He Is a Man Who Has Found Something More Interesting Than Women”

References

References
↑1 1932 January 24, The New York Times, Edgar Wallace Enjoys Hollywood, Quote Page X6, Column 4, New York. (ProQuest)

Secrecy: The Art of Telling a Thing To Only One Person At a Time

University of Oxford? Theresa Russell? Edna Worthley Underwood? Anonymous?

Dear Quote Investigator: I have been told with the highest level of confidentiality that the following comical definition has been employed at the University of Oxford:

Secret: You may tell it to only one person at a time.

Would you please explore the provenance of this quip?

Quote Investigator: The earliest match located by QI appeared in multiple U.S. newspapers in 1905. The joke was grouped together with several other humorous definitions, and no attribution was given. Here is a sampling of four items. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:[1] 1905 June 13, The Times-Democrat, Silhouettes: Definitions, Quote Page 6, Column 4, New Orleans, Louisiana, (Newspapers_com)

Eternity: Two hours of waiting in a dentist’s office.
Heathen: Anyone who does not profess the religion you don’t profess.
Secrecy: The art of telling a thing to only one person at a time.
Error: The mistaken act of another.

The text above was printed in “The Times-Democrat” of New Orleans, Louisiana. The same definitions appeared in “The Lexington Herald” of Lexington, Kentucky,[2] 1905 July 09, The Lexington Herald, Definitions (Acknowledgment: New Orleans Times Democrat), Quote Page 8, Column 4, Lexington, Kentucky.(GenealogyBank) “The Sunday Gazette and Telegraph” of Colorado Springs, Colorado,[3] 1905 July 23, The Sunday Gazette and Telegraph (Gazette-Telegraph), Definitions (Acknowledgment: New Orleans Times Democrat), page 21, Column 5, Colorado Springs, Colorado. (GenealogyBank) and other newspapers.

Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.

Continue reading “Secrecy: The Art of Telling a Thing To Only One Person At a Time”

References

References
↑1 1905 June 13, The Times-Democrat, Silhouettes: Definitions, Quote Page 6, Column 4, New Orleans, Louisiana, (Newspapers_com)
↑2 1905 July 09, The Lexington Herald, Definitions (Acknowledgment: New Orleans Times Democrat), Quote Page 8, Column 4, Lexington, Kentucky.(GenealogyBank)
↑3 1905 July 23, The Sunday Gazette and Telegraph (Gazette-Telegraph), Definitions (Acknowledgment: New Orleans Times Democrat), page 21, Column 5, Colorado Springs, Colorado. (GenealogyBank)

If Builders Built Buildings the Way Programmers Wrote Programs, Then the First Woodpecker That Came Along Would Destroy Civilization

Gerald Weinberg? Conrad Schneiker? Arthur Bloch? Clifford Stoll? Dennis Hall? Anonymous?

Dear Quote Investigator: Computer programs are not resilient. Small errors can cause a program to malfunction. In the 1960s a spacecraft bound for Venus quickly veered off course because a single character in the guidance program was accidentally omitted. This dangerous situation necessitated a self-destruct command and a multi-million dollar mission failure.

A vaguely remembered statement of exasperation reflects situations like this: A single woodpecker could destroy a vast wooden building if architects used the same design principles as computer programmers. Would you please explore the provenance of this saying?

Quote Investigator: The earliest match located by QI appeared in “The CoEvolution Quarterly” in 1975. Conrad Schneiker compiled and published “An Abridged Collection of Interdisciplinary Laws” which included the following three items. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:[1]1975 Winter, The CoEvolution Quarterly, Issue 8, An Abridged Collection of Interdisciplinary Laws by Conrad Schneiker, Start Page 138, Quote Page 139, Published by Point, Sausalito, California. … Continue reading

Weiler’s Law
Nothing is impossible for the man who doesn’t have to do it himself.

Weinberg’s Law
If builders built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, then the first woodpecker that came along would destroy civilization.

Westheimer’s Rule
To estimate the time it takes to do a task: estimate the time you think it should take, multiply by 2, and change the unit of measure to the next highest unit. Thus we allocate 2 days for a one hour task.

The 1978 citation presented further below identified the creator as Gerald Weinberg, an early computer scientist who had worked at the University of Nebraska.

Below are additional selected citations in chronological order. Continue reading “If Builders Built Buildings the Way Programmers Wrote Programs, Then the First Woodpecker That Came Along Would Destroy Civilization”

References

References
↑1 1975 Winter, The CoEvolution Quarterly, Issue 8, An Abridged Collection of Interdisciplinary Laws by Conrad Schneiker, Start Page 138, Quote Page 139, Published by Point, Sausalito, California. (Verified with scans)

Absence of Evidence Is Not Evidence of Absence

Carl Sagan? Martin Rees? William Wright? William Housman? W. J. Sollas? Dugald Bell? Anonymous?

Dear Quote Investigator: The existence or non-existence of intelligent extraterrestrial life is a highly contentious subject. Some thinkers who are open to the possibility of interstellar aliens also believe that the current evidence is inadequate; hence, they advocate using radio telescope dishes as listening devices to collect more data. They also point to the following maxim to discourage premature judgments:

Absence of evidence is not evidence of absence.

This saying has been attributed to cosmologist Martin Rees and astronomer Carl Sagan; however, I think it was circulating before these gentlemen were born. Would you please explore this topic?

Quote Investigator: Tracing this statement is difficult because it has evolved over time. A partial match for six of the eight words occurred in a scholarly paper read during a meeting of the “Victoria Institute” held in London in 1887. The Reverend William Wright’s paper titled “The Empire of the Hittites” argued that data about the movements of the Hittite people was incomplete; therefore, this paucity of evidence should not result in firm conclusions. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:[1]1888, Journal of the Transactions of The Victoria Institute, or Philosophical Society of Great Britain, Volume 21, Ordinary Meeting on January 3, 1887, (Paper read at the meeting by the author), The … Continue reading

It is urged that the Hittites could not have been settled in Southern Palestine because there are few direct references to their southern settlements in the inscriptions. To this I reply, that the absence of evidence is not evidence. The Egyptians marched up the coast of Syria, and turned inland to Megiddo and Kadesh, where they met the Hittites. The inscriptions are full of the doings of the Hittites at Megiddo and Kadesh, because the Egyptians went thither. They have nothing to say of the Hittites of Hebron, because the Egyptians did not go thither. The inscriptions are records of what happened during campaigns in which Egypt must have made great sacrifices.

Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.

Continue reading “Absence of Evidence Is Not Evidence of Absence”

References

References
↑1 1888, Journal of the Transactions of The Victoria Institute, or Philosophical Society of Great Britain, Volume 21, Ordinary Meeting on January 3, 1887, (Paper read at the meeting by the author), The Empire of the Hittites by the Rev. William Wright, Start Page 55, Quote Page 59, Published by The Victoria Institute, London. (HathiTrust Full View) link

Hurt People Hurt People

Rick Warren? Will Bowen? Yehuda Berg? Charles Eads? Oprah Winfrey? Helen Boyd? Doug Manning? Emotions Anonymous? Barbara Johnson? Anonymous?

Dear Quote Investigator: People who have been hurt or damaged in life sometimes respond by striking out and hurting the people who are around them. A concise adage expresses this viewpoint:

Hurt people hurt people.

This statement been ascribed to pastor Rick Warren, minister Will Bowen, and rabbi Yehuda Berg who are all bestselling authors. Would you please explore this topic?

Quote Investigator: These three influential religious figures have all employed the saying, but only after it was circulating.

The earliest match located by QI appeared in an Amarillo, Texas newspaper in 1959. A columnist described a meeting of the Parent Teacher Association held at a local Junior High. One of the speakers was named Charles Eads. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:[1] 1959 February 26, Amarillo Globe-Times, Polk Street Professor, Quote Page 30, Column 1, Amarillo, Texas. (Newspapers_com)

Charles claimed the teacher’s job is to take 25 or 30 live wires and make sure they are well grounded. And he said the human anatomy is a most peculiar mechanism. If you pat it on the back it often makes the head swell.

Then he made a statement that might give pause to a student of psychology. It’s worded peculiarly. The statement is, “Hurt people hurt people.” So, maybe before I wound someone next time, I’ll stop and think if it’s because I’ve been hurt, myself.

It is possible that Charles Eads coined the saying; alternatively, he was simply repeating a phrase he had heard previously.

Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.

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References

References
↑1 1959 February 26, Amarillo Globe-Times, Polk Street Professor, Quote Page 30, Column 1, Amarillo, Texas. (Newspapers_com)