This Earth Is Used By Other Planets as a Lunatic Asylum

George Bernard Shaw? Voltaire? Apocryphal? Dear Quote Investigator: Influential intellectuals have experienced cosmic despair while observing the behavior of humankind. Here are some statements I have heard attributed to Voltaire, George Bernard Shaw and others: This planet is being used as an insane asylum by other planets. Beings from other planets are using the Earth …

The Time To Be Happy Is Now; The Place To Be Happy Is Here

Creator: Robert G. Ingersoll, prominent orator and exponent of agnosticism Context: In 1899 Ingersoll was asked to record his thoughts using an early phonograph device. According to a newspaper account his remarks included the following combination of hedonism and altruism. Emphasis added to excerpts:[1]1899 February 3, The Junction City Republican, His Idea of Immortality: Col. …

Mediocrity is My Biggest Fear

Creator: Robert Downey Jr., Hollywood star known for playing comic book hero Iron Man and famous sleuth Sherlock Holmes Context: While living in Los Angles the photographer Karen Hardy Bystedt met with young performers who were launching their movie careers:[1]1996 Copyright, Before They Were Famous: In Their Own Words by Karen Hardy Bystedt, (Collection of …

Tact Is the Knack of Making a Point Without Making an Enemy

Isaac Newton? Howard W. Newton? Anonymous? Dear Quote Investigator: The brilliant physicist and mathematician Isaac Newton supposedly coined the following expression: Tact is the art of making a point without making an enemy. A variant of this statement uses “knack” instead of “art”. Interestingly, Isaac Newton made some powerful enemies during his lifetime. Do you …

If You Find a Book You Really Want To Read But It Hasn’t Been Written Yet, Then You Must Write It

Toni Morrison? Benjamin Disraeli? Mickey Spillane? C. S. Lewis? J. R. R. Tolkien? Janet Fitch? Ann Patchett? Apocryphal? Dear Quote Investigator: The prominent American editor, writer, and educator Toni Morrison who authored the Pulitzer Prize-winning novel “Beloved” has been credited with an exhilarating remark about the creative process: If there’s a book you really want …

Ten Decimals of π Are Sufficient To Give the Circumference of the Earth To the Fraction of an Inch

Simon Newcomb? John Casey? George McC. Robson? Apocryphal? Dear Quote Investigator: The number π is a fundamental mathematical constant which equals the ratio of a circle’s circumference to its diameter. Trillions of digits of the decimal expansion of π have been calculated using electronic computers and innovative algorithms. Yet, this precision is not needed in …

Life Is a Treasure Hunt

Olivia Wyndham? Marjorie G. Hellier? Kevin J. Cook? Anonymous? Dear Quote Investigator: I have been attempting to trace an uplifting proverb about adventure and discovery: Life is a treasure hunt. The lesson of this phrase is illustrated by the delight experienced when uncovering early instances of this adage. Would you please help? Quote Investigator: In …

“I Enjoyed Your Book. Who Wrote It for You?” “I’m So Glad You Liked It. Who Read It To You?”

Ilka Chase vs. Anonymous Actress? Ilka Chase vs. Humphrey Bogart? Sylvia Strum Bremer vs. Cynic? Liz Carpenter vs. Arthur Schlesinger Jr.? Eric Morecambe vs. Ernie Wise? Dear Quote Investigator: For many years ghostwriters have been composing books for well-known celebrities. The following prickly repartee shows that authorship is a sensitive topic: “I enjoyed your book. …

Be Quick To Praise. People Like To Praise Those Who Praise Them

Creator: Bernard Baruch, U.S. financier, philanthropist, and presidential adviser Context: In 1948 Bernard M. Baruch spoke at a youth forum sponsored by “The New York Daily Mirror” newspaper and offered several rules for success to his listeners including the following. Boldface added to excerpt:[1] 1948 December 12, The Miami News, Rules For Success Listed By …

If You Fail To Prepare You Are Preparing To Fail

Benjamin Franklin? H. K. Williams? James H. Hope? E. B. Gregory? Dalton E. Brady? Robert H. Schuller? John Wooden? Anonymous? Dear Quote Investigator: Proper planning is fundamental to success. Benjamin Franklin has been credited with an admonitory aphorism. Here are three versions using “plan” and “prepare”: Failing to plan is planning to fail. The person …