Quote Investigator® – Page 195

Quote Origin: I Would Rather Walk With a Friend in the Dark Than Alone in the Light

Helen Keller? Anne Sullivan? Apocryphal?

Question for Quote Investigator: Helen Keller was once asked about the price she would pay to gain the sense of sight. Her reported response was thoughtful and poignant:

I would rather walk with a friend in the dark than walk alone in the light.

What were the circumstances surrounding this quotation? I have been unable to find a solid citation.

Reply from Quote Investigator: In the early 1920s Helen Keller and her inseparable teacher Anne Sullivan faced a difficult financial situation, and they decided to earn money via appearances on the vaudeville circuit. The pair had already given performances on the Chautauqua circuit, and hence the experience of exhibiting themselves for remuneration was not alien.

The comprehensive dual biography “Helen and Teacher: The Story of Helen Keller and Anne Sullivan Macy” by Joseph P. Lash released in 1980 included a chapter about this interval spent in show business. The act of Keller and Sullivan “lasted only twenty minutes”. A question and answer period allowed Keller to deliver many witty and sharp observations about her life and society. But, she and Sullivan did make advance preparations:¹

Many of her quick sallies were not as spontaneous as they appeared. With businesslike foresight they began to list the questions usually asked, together with answers Helen might give. In the end the list ran to seventeen pages.

A list with dozens of Q&A pairs was given in the biography by Lash. The author did not state the provenance of the list, but he did have access to several key repositories, e.g., the Helen Keller archives at the American Foundation for the Blind and the archive at the Alexander Graham Bell Association for the Deaf in Washington, D.C. Here is a small sample of five Q&A pairs. The first concerns President Warren G. Harding:

Q. What do you think of Mr. Harding?
A. I have a fellow-feeling for him; he seems as blind as I am.

Q. What is the greatest obstacle to universal peace?
A. The human race.

Q. What is the slowest thing in the world?
A. Congress.

Q. Do you think women are men’s intellectual equals?
A. I think God made woman foolish so that she might be a suitable companion to man.

Q. Do you desire your sight more than anything else in the world?
A. No! No! I would rather walk with a friend in the dark than walk alone in the light.

The last answer above corresponds to the statement under exploration. So there is good evidence that Keller did communicate this saying. However, variants of this quote were being used in the religious domain many years earlier as discussed below.

Here are additional selected citations in chronological order.

Quote Origin: There Are Three Rules for the Writing of a Novel

W. Somerset Maugham? Oscar Wilde? Mark Twain? Bret Harte? Anonymous?

Question for Quote Investigator: With the rapid growth of ebooks it seems that everyone is writing a book. Here is the funniest advice I have heard on this topic:

There are three rules for writing a novel. Unfortunately, no one knows what they are.

Several prominent authors have offered writing advice in the form of three rules. Could you explore the background of these sayings?

Reply from Quote Investigator: The earliest evidence located by QI of this comical piece of non-advice was published in a 1977 volume providing guidance to neophyte authors titled “Maybe You Should Write a Book” by Ralph Daigh. This volume was not designed to teach the reader how to write, and Daigh illustrated that point with the following anecdote:¹

Somerset Maugham is credited with summing it all up when in addressing a friend’s class on English literature he was asked by a student how to write a novel.

Maugham’s answer was:
“There are three rules for the writing of a novel.
“Unfortunately no one knows what they are.”

Popular author, Maugham, died in 1965, so the documentation for this attribution is not ideal. Perhaps future discoveries will provide further substantiation.

Further below, this article will discuss writing advice that has been attributed to the prominent authors Bret Harte, Mark Twain, and Oscar Wilde. In each case the guidance utilized a three-fold structure. The article will also present several variants of the quotation credited to Maugham in domains such as: politics, moviemaking, and aviation. Immediately below, an antecedent of the jest in the realm of card games is discussed.

Here are additional selected citations in chronological order.

Quote Origin: Abstract Art: A Product of the Untalented, Sold by the Unprincipled to the Utterly Bewildered

Al Capp? Apocryphal?

Question for Quote Investigator: The cartoonist Al Capp was famous for creating the long-running comic strip Li’l Abner. During the 1960s he reportedly described abstract art with the following amusing and acerbic phrase:

A product of the untalented sold by the unprincipled to the utterly bewildered.

Today this description could be applied to several products. Is this quotation accurate?

Reply from Quote Investigator: Al Capp did make more than one comment of this type. The earliest evidence located by QI was printed in a 1961 newspaper column by Capp who presented a comedic conception of a “Library of Creative Art” in the year 2000, i.e., thirty-nine years in the future.

Capp indicated that contemporary TV commercials would be preserved in the future museum because they embodied “man’s supreme achievement in the realm of wild, impossible fantasy.” However, abstract art works were labeled “incomprehensible messes”, and they would not be present in the museum. The fictional curator stated the following. Boldface has been added to passages below:¹

By excluding their messes from the library the place will look cleaner, and maybe our time will be forgotten as one when the creations of the untalented, the unhealthy, and the unhousebroken were praised by the unearthly and sold by the unprincipled to the totally bewildered.

We’ll all look better in the year 2000 if we retain only the work of artists now called hacks, but who stubbornly kept alive the traditions of Michaelangelo, da Vinci, and Rembrandt.

Although, the museum and its curator were exaggerated satirical devices they did reflect some of the opinions held by Capp.

Here are additional selected citations in chronological order.

Quote Origin: As Soon as Government Management Begins It Upsets the Natural Equilibrium of Industrial Relations

Adam Smith? Everett Dean Martin? Apocryphal?

Question for Quote Investigator: Multiple books and websites attribute the following quotation to the influential economic thinker Adam Smith, but I think the ascription is incorrect:

As soon as government management begins it upsets the natural equilibrium of industrial relations, and each interference only requires further bureaucratic control until the end is the tyranny of the totalitarian state.

Usually these words are assigned to the landmark 1775 text “The Wealth of Nations”, but I have carefully searched electronic copies of this work and concluded that the quote is absent. Furthermore, the vocabulary in the passage is chronologically incongruous. The word “totalitarian” first entered the English language only in the 1920s, and that is more than 130 years after the death of Adam Smith in 1790. Could you trace this quote to identify its true origin?

Reply from Quote Investigator: Thanks to the questioner for the perceptive analysis accompanying the query. The passage above was not written by Adam Smith. It first appeared in a 1939 essay by Everett Dean Martin who was a Professor of Social Philosophy at Claremont Colleges in California. The statement was Martin’s summary analysis of Adam Smith’s economic philosophy. Martin used his own words, and he did not claim that he was quoting Smith.

Martin’s paper was presented at the Annual Convention of the Investment Banker’s Association of America in 1939 and then was published in the November issue of the journal “Investment Banking” under the title “Social Philosophies at War”. The following passage occurred shortly before the quotation in the essay and indicated the topic:¹

Adam Smith, whose book, “The Wealth of Nations,” was written the same year as our Declaration of Independence, pointed out the moral and economic significance of Locke’s political philosophy. Individual responsibility is the very goal and meaning of free government. There must be no bureaucratic management of affairs which men had best decide for themselves.

The following excerpt from Martin’s paper included the passage being traced:

He held that not only is government incompetent to regulate by decree or by grant the affairs of individuals, but its meddling inevitably results in putting a premium on inefficiency. As soon as government management begins it upsets the natural equilibrium of industrial relations, and each interference only requires further bureaucratic control until the end is the tyranny of the totalitarian state.

The final sentence above was later reassigned directly to Adam Smith. This misattribution has been widely disseminated, and today it is present in several quotation databases.

Here are additional comments and selected citations in chronological order.

Quote Origin: Beatles Rejection: We Don’t Like Their Sound. Groups of Guitars Are On Their Way Out

Hunter Davies? Mike Smith? Dick Rowe? Brian Epstein? Apocryphal?

Question for Quote Investigator: In the early days of the Beatles a record executive evaluated the band to decide whether to offer them a contract. He supposedly said:

We don’t like their sound, and guitar music is on the way out.

I have heard some other simpler versions of the statement:

Guitar groups are on the way out.
Guitar bands are on their way out.

The decision not to sign the Beatles was the biggest blunder in music history. Decca Records is usually named as the foolish company. Is there any truth to this anecdote?

Reply from Quote Investigator: The earliest evidence known to QI appeared in the 1964 book “A Cellarful of Noise” by Brian Epstein who was the manager of the Beatles from 1962 until his death in 1967. Epstein was attempting to obtain a recording contract for the Beatles when he convinced A & R (Artists and Repertoire) executive Mike Smith of Decca Records to view the Beatles at The Cavern Club venue.

Smith was impressed and agreed to provide an audition for the group on New Year’s Day in 1962. The Beatles taped several numbers for the executives to review. Epstein attended a luncheon appointment with Decca executives Beecher Stevens and Dick Rowe to hear the verdict. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:¹

We had coffee, and Mr. Rowe, a short plump man, said to me: “Not to mince words, Mr. Epstein, we don’t like your boys’ sound. Groups of four guitarists are on the way out.”

I said, masking the cold disappointment which had spread over me: “You must be out of your mind. These boys are going to explode. I am completely confident that one day they will be bigger than Elvis Presley.”

The next earliest evidence located by QI was printed in “The Beatles: The Authorized Biography” by Hunter Davies in 1968. The book described the same tale of Epstein attempting to use his contacts in the music industry to obtain a recording contract for the Beatles. He succeeded in obtaining an audition for the group with Decca:²

The weeks passed and nothing happened. They continued playing their local dates on Merseyside, but all the time expecting Decca to whisk them to the big time. Then in March, after a lot of pestering, Brian heard from Dick Rowe, Mike Smith’s boss at Decca, that they had decided not to record the Beatles. “He told me they didn’t like the sound. Groups of guitars were on the way out. I told him I was completely confident that these boys were going to be bigger than Elvis Presley.”

Thus, Beatles manager Brian Epstein provided the primary evidence for the quotation spoken by executive Dick Rowe when Decca rejected the Beatles. Later Beatles biographer Hunter Davies concurred.

Here are additional selected citations in chronological order.

Quote Origin: I Never Forget a Face, But I’ll Make an Exception in Your Case

Groucho Marx? George Oppenheimer? John Barrymore? Alan Gale? Anonymous?

Question for Quote Investigator: When I am at a party I sometimes have trouble recalling the name of a person I have met before. But my recalcitrant memory has no difficulty remembering the line credited to Groucho Marx:

I never forget a face, but in your case I’d be glad to make an exception.

When I performed a search I found some other versions:

I never forget a face, but I’ll make an exception in your case.
I never forget a face—but I’m willing to make an exception in your case.

Is this a genuine Groucho joke or is it just a quip masquerading with a fake nose and glasses?

Reply from Quote Investigator: The earliest match known to QI appeared in “The Hollywood Reporter” in December 1935 within an article titled “Harpo, Chico, Groucho and Scenario” by screenwriter George Oppenheimer. The piece contained a Groucho-like fictional character named Lyons. The first line below was spoken by the narrator of the article who was a fictional version of Oppenheimer. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:¹

“It’s funny. I’m sure I know you. I never forget a face.”

“Neither do I,” answered Lyons, “but I’m going to make an exception in your case. Horsefeathers, second reel.”

It was useless. The man was a maniac and then I looked again. There was pain in Lyons’ eyes … real acute suffering.

“Horse Feathers” was a 1932 Marx Brothers movie, but QI has not found this line within that movie script. Oppenheimer was one of the three writers of the 1937 Marx Brothers film “A Day at the Races”.

The next match found by QI appeared in the syndicated Hollywood gossip column of Sidney Skolsky in November 1936:²

Groucho Marx, on meeting a prominent actress, said: “I never forget a face —but I’m going to make an exception in your case.”

QI believes Groucho Marx is the most likely creator of this jape. Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.

Dialogue Origin: “What Do You Think of Western Civilization?” “I Think It Would Be a Good Idea”

Mohandas Gandhi? Apocryphal?

A view of the inside of an old building.

Question for Quote Investigator: Mahatma Gandhi is credited with a brilliantly acerbic remark made in response to a question from a self-satisfied journalist:

Journalist: What do you think of Western civilization?
Gandhi: I think it would be a good idea.

Unfortunately, I have not been able to find any solid citations for this sharp exchange. The best I have located is second-hand information in the 1970s. Is there any good support for this quote?

Reply from Quote Investigator: Mohandas Gandhi died in 1948, and the earliest evidence QI has located appeared many years later in January 1967. The Seattle Times newspaper stated that the exchange was mentioned in a television documentary on a major U.S. network. Emphasis added to excerpts by QI:¹

Quote of the week from the superb C.B.S. documentary, “The Italians”: Mahatma Gandhi, on being asked, “What do you think of Western civilization?,” was reported to have answered, “I think it would be a good idea”.

According to the website of the Paley Center for Media the documentary “The Italians” was broadcast as a CBS News Special on January 17, 1967. The program was adapted from a book, and the author acted as the host:²

A documentary freely adapted from Luigi Barzini’s book “The Italians.” Barzini presides over a selective tour of Italy, discussing the Italian people, their culture, customs, and history.

In September 1967 the dialog was disseminated in the mass-circulation periodical Readerâ€™s Digest. The words were once again connected to a documentary on CBS:³

MOHANDAS GANDHI was once asked: “What do you think of Western civilization?” “I think it would be a good idea,” he replied.
â€” CBS News Special, “The Italians”

Here are additional selected citations and commentary.

Quote Origin: But Suppose the Child Inherited My Beauty and Your Brains?

George Bernard Shaw and Isadora Duncan? Anatole France and Isadora Duncan? Arthur Miller and Marilyn Monroe? Albert Einstein and a chorus girl? George Bernard Shaw and a strange lady in Zurich?

Question for Quote Investigator: Reportedly there was famous exchange between the prominent playwright George Bernard Shaw and the glamorous dancer Isadora Duncan on the topic of producing a child together. Duncan stated that Shaw had a magnificent brain and she had a glorious beauty; the combination would yield a remarkable child. Shaw replied with regret that he feared the result would embody his beauty and her brains.

Recently, I read this same tale, but the dialog was between two other people: the playwright Arthur Miller and the icon Marilyn Monroe. Is this anecdote genuine? Who were the participants?

Reply from Quote Investigator: The earliest evidence matching the template of this story located by QI was published in the Boston Globe newspaper in 1923. The two supposed participants were the Frenchman Anatole France who was awarded the Nobel Prize in Literature in 1921 and the acclaimed dancer Isadora Duncan. The spelling “Isadore” was used by the paper:¹

In all probability the conversation between Isadore Duncan and Anatole France, who were discussing eugenics, came to a sudden stop when Isadore said: “Imagine a child with my beauty and your brains!” and Anatole responded: “Yes, but imagine a child with my beauty and your brains!”

A version of the anecdote featuring George Bernard Shaw and Isadora Duncan was in circulation during the same time period. Here is an instance from an Interfraternity Conference held in New York in 1925 where the communication between Shaw and Duncan was via letters instead of spoken. This tale was presented by Oswald C. Hering, a noted architect. The spelling “Isidora” was used in the following passage:²

It reminds me of the story going around about the letters interchanged by Isidora Duncan and Bernard Shaw. Miss Duncan wrote Mr. Shaw as follows: ‘My dear Mr. Shaw: I beg to remind you that as you have the greatest brain in the world, and I have the most beautiful body, it is our duty to posterity to have a child.’ Whereupon Mr. Shaw replied to Miss Duncan: ‘My dear Miss Duncan: I admit that I have the greatest brain in the world and that you have the most beautiful body, but it might happen that our child would have my body and your brain. Therefore, I respectfully decline.’

This popular story was disseminated internationally, and George Bernard Shaw was asked directly about the anecdote by the editor of the German periodical Sächsisches Volksblatt because of a controversy involving a writer named Max Hayek. A short story by Hayek shared similarities with the anecdote, and he was accused plagiarizing an instance of the tale featuring Shaw and Duncan that was published in the Italian periodical Milan Corriere della Sera.

On March 3, 1926 Shaw sent a letter in which he strongly denied the Italian story about his interaction with Duncan and remarked on the unreliability of newspaper accounts in general:³

… No beautiful American dancer has ever proposed marriage to me, on eugenic or any other grounds. The Italian journalist invented the dancer and her proposal; stole the witty reply from Herr Max; and chose me for the hero of his tale because newspapers always buy stories about me. 99% of these stories are flat falsehoods. 1/2% are half true. The remaining 1/2% are true, but spoilt in the telling.

Strikingly, Shaw made additional intriguing comments on this topic in 1931. He claimed that he once received a comparable “strange offer” from a “foreign actress”, and his reply was analogous to the one in the famous anecdote. The details are given further below.

Here are additional selected citations and commentary.

Quote Origin: The Scariest Monsters Are the Ones That Lurk Within Our Souls

Edgar Allan Poe? Rona Jaffe? Apocryphal?

Question for Quote Investigator: The following quotation has been tweeted repeatedly, and I have seen it on Facebook and several tumblrs. The words are always ascribed to the famed poet and writer of the macabre Edgar Allan Poe:

The scariest monsters are the ones that lurk within our souls.

I have not found this expression in any stories or essays by Poe, and I am suspicious. Is this ascription accurate?

Reply from Quote Investigator: Probably not. QI has not located this saying in any works by Edgar Allan Poe.

On November 9, 2011 a person with the twitter handle @Edgar_Allan_Poe sent out the following tweet. The message was retweeted at least 522 times reflecting its popularity and its wide dissemination:¹

The scariest monsters are the ones that lurk within our souls.

Edgar Allan Poe died in 1849, and QI thinks that it is unlikely a supernatural agency has been channeling his utterances through twitter. The twitter profile of @Edgar_Allan_Poe currently states:²

Woebegone Poet, Prickly scribbler of the Fantastic, Inebriate, Literary Critic, Editor
Currently buried in Baltimore
71,690 Followers

The saying may have originated with the tweet on November 9, 2011. This tweet was identified by correspondent Adrian Bailey.

Here are additional selected citations and commentary.

Quote Origin: Life Isn’t Fair, But Government Must Be

Ann Richards? John F. Kennedy? Apocryphal?

Question for Quote Investigator: There is a new one-woman play titled “ANN” about Ann Richards who was the Governor of Texas in the 1990s. The theatrical presentation contains a memorable line about her philosophy of government. I am not sure if I remember it exactly, but the statement is similar to this:

Life isn’t fair, but government should be.

Did Ann Richards say this? When? When I searched I found some people claiming JFK said this.

Reply from Quote Investigator: Ann Richards was sworn in as governor of Texas on January 15, 1991, and she delivered a speech during the inauguration festivities that was reported on the next day in the San Antonio Express-News. The expression she spoke differed by one word from the phrase given in the query:¹

Focusing on her campaign themes of “A New Texas” and giving the government back to the people, Richards said, “There is nothing more fundamentally important to me than the understanding that this administration exists to serve the taxpayers.”

“Life isn’t fair, but government must be,” she said.

Interestingly, the Houston Chronicle also reported on the inauguration festivities and presented a line spoken by Richards; however, the wording was slightly different. The word “absolutely” was included:²

Richards, in summoning the slain president’s memory, said: “Years ago, John Kennedy said that ‘Life isn’t fair.’ Life is not fair, but government absolutely must be.”

QI has not heard an audio recording of the speech by Richards and does not know which transcript is accurate. It is also conceivable that Richards employed the saying more than once on inauguration day. If she did say it twice, perhaps both versions were accurate.

Here are additional selected citations in chronological order.