Shonda Rhimes? Apocryphal?
Question for Quote Investigator: The acclaimed long-running television series Grey’s Anatomy was created by writer and producer Shonda Rhimes. Her company Shondaland has successfully produced many lauded shows. Predictably, Rhimes leads a very busy life.
Unpredictably, she was willing to speak with complete candor to graduating Ivy League students. What sobering message did she deliver about the inevitable tradeoffs that an enterprising person must make?
Reply from Quote Investigator: Inspirational speakers prefer to present the upbeat message: You can have it all. When Shonda Rhimes delivered the commencement address at her alma mater Dartmouth University in 2014 she offered a different lesson: If you are living fully it is impossible to meet all the demands on your time and energy. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:1
“Shonda, how do you do it all?” The answer is this, “I don’t.” Whenever you see me somewhere succeeding in one area of my life, that almost certainly means I am failing in another area of my life. If I am killing it on a Scandal script for work, I am probably missing bath and story time at home . . .
That is the tradeoff. That is the Faustian bargain one makes with the devil that comes with being a powerful working woman who is also a powerful mother . . .
And yet. I want my daughters to see me and know me as a woman who works. I want that example set for them.
A video of her speech is available on YouTube here.2
Continue reading “Quote Origin: Whenever You See Me Somewhere Succeeding In One Area of My Life, That Almost Certainly Means I Am Failing In Another”