Joke Origin: “Give Me a Cup of Coffee Without Cream” “You’ll Have To Take It Without Milk. We Haven’t Any Cream”

Jean-Paul Sartre? George Carlin? Slavoj Žižek? O. O. McIntyre? Sewell Ford? Billy Wilder? Leo Rosten? Anonymous? Question for Quote Investigator: Philosophers, linguists, and humorists enjoy the following joke about tacit knowledge: A person enters a café and requests coffee without cream. After a delay the waiter returns and says “I’m sorry. We’re out of cream. …

Government Can Easily Exist Without Law, But Law Cannot Exist Without Government

Bertrand Russell? Leo Rosten? Apocryphal? Dear Quote Investigator: The relationship between government and law can be deftly summarized with two contrasting statements: Government can exist without law(s). Law(s) cannot exist without government. These dual notions have been attributed to the famous British mathematician and social critic Bertrand Russell. Would you please help me to find …

“Is Your New Baby a Boy Or a Girl?” “Yes”

Bertrand Russell? Leo Rosten? Apocryphal? Anonymous? Dear Quote Investigator: The prominent British philosopher and essayist Bertrand Russell co-wrote an important book of classical logic titled “Principia Mathematica”. An anecdote about Russell is based on a humorously rigorous logical interpretation of a question. A colleague spoke to Russell shortly after his wife had a baby: “Congratulations. …

Fashions, After All, Are Only Induced Epidemics

George Bernard Shaw? Gloria Steinem? W.H. Auden? Leo Rosten? Apocryphal? Dear Quote Investigator: A style, jingle, gif, graffito, saying, or idea that rapidly mutates and propagates through a culture and achieves popularity is called a “meme” nowadays. The coinage of “meme” was based on “gene”, but a different biological metaphor was employed in the past. …

The Most Fun You Can Have Without Laughing

H. L. Mencken? Woody Allen? Walter Winchell? Alfred Lunt? Sarah Bernhardt? E. V. Durling? Jim Bishop? Colonel Stoopnagle? Frederick Chase Taylor? Leo Rosten? Humphrey Bogart? Anonymous? Dear Quote Investigator: The following declaration of high praise has been applied to love making: The most fun you can have without laughing. Influential commentator H. L. Mencken and …

A Dramatic Critic Is a Guy Who Surprises the Playwright by Informing Him What He Meant

Creator: Wilson Mizner, playwright, entrepreneur, adventurer Context: Mizner died in 1933. A biography of his colorful life appeared in 1935 called “The Fabulous Wilson Mizner” by Edward Dean Sullivan. The chapter “Miznerisms” was dedicated to his witticisms. Here were three. Emphasis added to excerpts:[ref] 1935, The Fabulous Wilson Mizner by Edward Dean Sullivan, Chapter 17: …

Quote Origin: Truth Is Stranger than Fiction, But It Is Because Fiction Is Obliged to Stick to Possibilities; Truth Isn’t

Mark Twain? Lord Byron? G. K. Chesterton? Edward Bellamy? Humphrey Bogart? Leo Rosten? Tom Clancy? Question for Quote Investigator: There is a wonderful quotation by Mark Twain about the implausibility of truth versus fiction. Here are four versions: 1) Why shouldn’t truth be stranger than fiction? Fiction, after all, has to make sense. 2) It’s …

The Purpose of Life Is Not To Be Happy But To Matter

Ralph Waldo Emerson? Leo Rosten? Thomas Carlyle? Anonymous? Dear Quote Investigator: On Facebook and the web the following quotation has been circulating widely: The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived …

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