Quote Investigator® – Page 38

Quote Origin: It’s a Great Life If You Don’t Weaken

John Buchan? Elizabeth Murray? Graham Greene? Dorothy Parker? Thomas Carter? H. L. Mencken? Sime Silverman? Karl Braun? Gene Byrnes? Anonymous?

Question for Quote Investigator: When you face a series of obstacles and successfully persevere you might employ the following saying. Here are three versions:

It’s a great life if you don’t weaken.
It’s a grand life if you don’t weaken.
It’s a joyful life if you don’t weaken.

Over time the meaning has shifted, and it has become ironic. The Scottish novelist and politician John Buchan often receives credit for this remark. Would you please explore this topic?

Reply from Quote Investigator: John Buchan did use the expression in a 1919 novel. Details are given further below. But Buchan was not the originator.

The earliest match located by QI appeared in 1908 within an article published in “The Evening Telegram” of Salt Lake City, Utah. Police picked up a man who was acting like a hobo in Provo, Utah. He revealed to the officers that he was a wealthy individual named Thomas Carter, and he told them to contact his banker in Salt Lake City to verify his identity. In the following passage the word “jungle” is slang for a hobo encampment. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:¹

“You see,” he said, “this jungle life is a grand one if you don’t weaken. Talk about experience, why when I get back to the folks I will have had enough experience to fill a molasses barrel. When I get home I will sure have a bigger heart for these fellows you officers term tramps.”

A journalist heard this odd tale and asked Carter about his motivation:

“Well, I’ll tell you I am just paying an election bet. I bet that “Uncle Joe” Cannon would not be re-elected to the house and now I must make good as a hobo for sixty days or forfeit $5000. It’s a grand life if you don’t weaken.”

QI tentatively credits Thomas Carter with the saying although there is a substantial probability that the phrase was already in circulation, and future researchers may learn more.

Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.

If You Want To Lead the Orchestra You Must Turn Your Back To the Crowd

Lawrence Welk? Max Lucado? G. P. Malalasekera? James Crook? Islwyn Jeneins? Richard Wagner? Anonymous?

Dear Quote Investigator: A genuine leader must be willing to ignore a popularly help opinion when it is flawed and act in the best interest of all. This thought has been conveyed via a clever analogy:

When you wish to lead an orchestra you must be willing to turn your back on the crowd.

This saying has been attributed to bandleader Lawrence Welk, church minister Max Lucado, and someone named James Crook. Would you please explore the provenance of this expression?

Quote Investigator: In 1933 “The People” newspaper of London published a column called “Thought For To-day” containing items acquired from readers with the following promise of compensation:

Half-a-Guinea will be paid for the best original thought published. No quotation from books, calendars, etc.

On March 9, 1933 the paper printed this item and ascription. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:[ref] 1933 March 19, The People, Thought For To-day, Quote Page 12, Column 6, London, England. (British Newspaper Archive) [/ref]

If you want to lead the orchestra you must turn your back to the crowd.
From Islwyn Jeneins, 27 Pier Street, Rhymney, Mon.

The citation above was the earliest located by QI, and the newspaper rules specified that the saying was supposed to be original; hence, QI tentatively credits Islwyn Jeneins with authorship. Of course, it remains possible that the adage was lifted from elsewhere, and future researchers may discover more on this topic.

Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.

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Quote Origin: Once the Machine Thinking Method Had Started, It Would Not Take Long To Outstrip Our Feeble Powers

Alan Turing? Sara Turing? Stuart Russell? Apocryphal?

Question for Quote Investigator: A pioneering mathematician and computer researcher in the 1950s believed that an intelligent computer system could be built, and “it would not take long to outstrip our feeble powers”. Would you please tell me the name of this person and help me to find a citation?

Reply from Quote Investigator: Alan M. Turing was a major figure in the field of computer science who died in 1954. His mother Sara published a book about his life in 1959, and she included a draft of a lecture he delivered in Manchester, England in 1951. Turing’s address titled “Intelligent Machinery, A Heretical Theory” explored the consequences of building computer systems capable of displaying intelligence. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:¹

There would be plenty to do in trying, say, to keep one’s intelligence up to the standard set by the machines, for it seems probable that once the machine thinking method had started, it would not take long to outstrip our feeble powers. There would be no question of the machines dying, and they would be able to converse with each other to sharpen their wits. At some stage therefore we should have to expect the machines to take control, in the way that is mentioned in Samuel Butler’s Erewhon.

Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.

The First Ultraintelligent Machine Is the Last Invention That Humanity Need Ever Make

Irving John Good? Arthur C. Clarke? Philip J. Davis? Reuben Hersh? Vernor Vinge? Raymond Kurzweil? Apocryphal?

Dear Quote Investigator: A prominent computer researcher in the 1950s or 1960s predicted that humanity would create a superintelligent machine sometime during the twentieth century. The researcher believed that this machine would be humanity’s last invention. Would you please tell me the name of this person and help me to find a citation?

Quote Investigator: In 1965 mathematician, cryptographer, and computer researcher Irving John Good published a speculative article titled “Concerning the First Ultraintelligent Machine” in the journal “Advances in Computers”. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:[ref] 1965, Advances in Computers, Volume 6, Speculations Concerning the First Ultraintelligent Machine by Irving John Good (Trinity College Oxford), Start Page 31, Quote Page 33, Academic Press Inc., New York. (Verified with scans) [/ref]

Let an ultraintelligent machine be defined as a machine that can far surpass all the intellectual activities of any man however clever. Since the design of machines is one of these intellectual activities, an ultraintelligent machine could design even better machines; there would then unquestionably be an “intelligence explosion,” and the intelligence of man would be left far behind.

Based on this extrapolation of ascending computer capabilities Good presented the following conclusion with an ominous proviso:

Thus the first ultraintelligent machine is the last invention that man need ever make, provided that the machine is docile enough to tell us how to keep it under control.

Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.

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Computers Make Very Fast, Very Accurate Mistakes

Roy Zuvers? Stephen Tonnison? Paul Parkhurst? Anonymous?

Dear Quote Investigator: Computers are known for performing blazingly fast calculations with excruciating precision. Computers are also known for inescapable bugs. A humorous statement combines these attributes:

Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes.

Would you please explore the provenance of this remark?

Quote Investigator: The earliest match located by QI appeared in a message posted on July 12, 1991 by Roy Zuvers to the newsgroup misc.handicap of the Usenet distributed message system. Zuvers was posting from Fidonet, a network of computer bulletin board systems. The quip used the singular “Computer” instead of “Computers”. The statement occurred in a signature line, and no attribution was provided. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:[ref] 1991 July 12, Usenet discussion message, Newsgroup: misc.handicap, From: Roy Zuvers, Subject: nfb and nls. (Google Groups Search; Accessed December 31, 2021) link [/ref]

* DeLuxe 1.1 #6289 Computer Make Very Fast, Very Accurate Mistake

Currently, the originator of the expression remains anonymous. Perhaps future researchers will discover earlier citations.

Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.

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Important Things in the World Have Been Accomplished by People Who Have Kept On Trying When There Seemed To Be No Hope At All

Dale Carnegie? Lee de Forest? Dorothy Carnegie? Apocryphal?

Dear Quote Investigator: Dale Carnegie was a popular author of self-improvement books. He once argued against premature discouragement by asserting that most remarkable achievements had been attained by people who continued to try even when no hope seemed possible. Would you please help me to find a citation?

Quote Investigator: In 1942 Dale Carnegie published a newspaper column about U.S. inventor Lee de Forest who faced numerous technological, financial, and legal obstacles in his career. He eventually obtained success with the creation of the Audion vacuum tube. Lee de Forest’s tale illustrated Carnegie’s point that one should not be easily deterred. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:[ref] 1942 January 29, The Marshall News Messenger, Being Discouraged Never Pays by Dale Carnegie, Quote Page 6, Column 5, Marshall, Texas. (Newspapers_com) [/ref]

Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no hope at all. That plan has worked for thousands of others; it may work for you, too.

Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.

Continue reading “Important Things in the World Have Been Accomplished by People Who Have Kept On Trying When There Seemed To Be No Hope At All”

A Hero Is an Ordinary Individual Who Finds the Strength To Persevere and Endure in Spite of Overwhelming Obstacles

Christopher Reeve? Apocryphal?

Dear Quote Investigator: Actor Christopher Reeve achieved enormous fame when he played the title character in the 1978 movie “Superman”. He suffered a tragic accident during an equestrian competition in 1995 which injured his spine and paralyzed part of his body. His life experiences caused him to change his perception of heroism. Would you please help me to find a citation for his definition of a hero?

Quote Investigator: In 1998 Christopher Reeve published the autobiography “Still Me”, and he described the definition of a hero that he gave to interviewers during the publicity campaign for the “Superman” movie in 1978. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:[ref] 1998 Copyright, Still Me by Christopher Reeve, Chapter 11, Quote Page 273, Random House, New York. (Verified with scans) [/ref]

The most frequently asked question was: “What is a hero?” I remember how easily I’d talk about it, the glib response I repeated so many times. My answer was that a hero is someone who commits a courageous action without considering the consequences.

Reeve’s notion of a hero was transformed as he gained greater insights to life:

Now my definition is completely different. I think a hero is an ordinary individual who finds the strength to persevere and endure in spite of overwhelming obstacles.

Below is one additional citation and a conclusion.

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Censors Tend To Do What Only Psychotics Do; They Confuse Reality With Illusion

David Cronenberg? Apocryphal?

Dear Quote Investigator: The prominent Canadian director David Cronenberg is best known for filming graphic horror movies. He vehemently disagrees with any restrictions on the material he depicts in his works. Apparently, he once compared a censor to a psychotic because he believed both confused illusion and reality. Would you please help me to find a citation?

Quote Investigator: In 1987 U.K. Channel 4 broadcast the documentary “Long Live the New Flesh: The Films of David Cronenberg” which included footage from an extended interview with the director.[ref] Website: IMDb, Documentary title: Long Live the New Flesh – The Films of David Cronenberg, Director: Laurens C. Postma, Production company: Victor Solnicki Productions, Length: 50 minutes, Release date: February 9, 1987 U.K., Website description: Internet Movie Database – movie and television program information. (Accessed imdb.com on December 22, 2021) link [/ref] Cronenberg delivered his harsh assessment of censors within a section of the documentary about the cuts made to his films. His forceful remark was attenuated by three clumsy phrases “I think that”, “in fact”, and “which is to say”:[ref] YouTube Video, Title: David Cronenberg – Long Live The New Flesh – Part 5, Uploaded on April 25, 2009, Uploaded by: PaulKuK0, Part 5 of 7 parts, (Quotation starts at 7 minutes 3 seconds of 9 minutes 34 seconds) Note: This video is from a fifty minute documentary about Canadian director David Cronenberg, (Accessed on youtube.com on December 22, 2021) link [/ref]

I think that censors tend to do what in fact only psychotics do which is to say that they confuse reality with illusion.

Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.

Continue reading “Censors Tend To Do What Only Psychotics Do; They Confuse Reality With Illusion”

The Best Time To Plant a Tree Was 30 Years Ago, and the Second Best Time To Plant a Tree Is Now

George W. White? Confucius? Chinese Saying? Jean Chretien? Earl Ubell? Anonymous?

Dear Quote Investigator: The payoff for some actions only occurs after a lengthy delay. For example, a newly planted fruit tree requires years of growth before it can generate a bumper harvest. Also, a shade tree may require decades of maturation before it produces an extensive canopy. Yet, regrets about previous missed opportunities should not prevent immediate constructive action. Here are two versions of a popular saying:

The best time to plant a tree is twenty years ago. The second best time is now.

The two best times to plant are tree are 30 years ago and today.

This is sometimes called a Chinese proverb, but I have not seen any solid supporting evidence. Would you please explore the provenance of this saying?

Quote Investigator: The earliest strong match known to QI appeared in “The Cleveland Plain Dealer” of Ohio in 1967. Local city councilman George W. White used the expression, but he disclaimed credit. Thus, the source was anonymous. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:[ref] 1967 March 19, The Cleveland Plain Dealer, “Negro Help for Negroes Under Way”, Quote Page 9A, Column 1, Cleveland, Ohio. (GenealogyBank) [/ref]

“Someone remarked,” White said, “that the best time to plant a tree was 30 years ago, and the second best time to plant a tree is now. That’s how it is with us.”

Thanks to linguistics researcher Barry Popik who located the above citation.

QI has found no substantive evidence that this saying is a Chinese proverb.

Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.

Continue reading “The Best Time To Plant a Tree Was 30 Years Ago, and the Second Best Time To Plant a Tree Is Now”

During Christmas People Will Forget the Past With a Present

Gladys Parker? Don Marquis? Walter Winchell? Uncle Ezra? Phyllis Diller? Anonymous?

Dear Quote Investigator: A collection of Christmas season quips employ wordplay based on “past” and “present”. Here are two examples:

What I like about Christmas is that you can make people forget the past with a present.

At Christmas time youngsters want the past forgotten and the present remembered.

Remarks of this type have been attributed to humorist Don Marquis, cartoonist Gladys Parker, and comedian Phyllis Diller. Would you please explore this topic?

Quote Investigator: This family of jokes is difficult to trace because the phrasing is variable. In January 1933 a one-panel cartoon called “Flapper Fanny Says” by Gladys Parker depicted a woman opening a present. The caption said the following. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:[ref] 1933 January 19, Public Opinion, (Caption of one panel cartoon: Flapper Fanny Says by Gladys Parker), Quote Page 12, Column 3, Chambersburg, Pennsylvania. (Newspapers_com) [/ref]

Nothing smoothes out the past like a present.

This instance of the quip did not mention Christmas, but it contained the key wordplay elements.

In February 1933 the “Brooklyn Daily Eagle” of New York printed an instance about birthdays with an anonymous attribution:[ref] 1933 February 24, Brooklyn Daily Eagle, Reverting to Type by Art Arthur, Quote Page 12, Column 2, Brooklyn, New York. (Newspapers_com) [/ref]

… the latest bit of wisdom scribbled on the bulletin board at Connie’s Inn reads, “On her birthday every girl wants her past forgotten and her presents remembered”

In July 1934 Gladys Parker revisited this notion in her one-panel cartoon “Flapper Fanny Says”. Parker’s illustration depicted a woman tending the flowers on a trellis, and the caption said:[ref] 1934 July 3, The Canton Repository, (Caption of one panel cartoon: Flapper Fanny Says by Gladys Parker), Quote Page 3, Column 4, Canton, Ohio. (GenealogyBank) [/ref]

Many a person will forget the past for a present.

Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.

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