Benjamin Jowett? Nellie McClung? Elbert Hubbard? Lionel Arthur Tollemache? James Kay-Shuttleworth? Ralph Lingen? George Otto Trevelyan? Wilbur F. Storey? Frederic William Farrar? Benjamin Disraeli? John Arbuthnot Fisher? Anonymous?
Question for Quote Investigator: Accomplishing a difficult task when facing strong opposition takes a forceful personality. Here are three pertinent guidelines for persevering:
(1) Never retract. Never explain. Get it done and let them howl.
(2) Don’t explain, don’t argue, get the thing done and let them howl.
(3) Never explain, never apologize. Get the thing done and let them howl.
The first statement has been attributed to scholar Benjamin Jowett who was a Master of Balliol College, Oxford. The second has been ascribed to U.S. essayist and aphorist Elbert Hubbard. The third has been credited to activist Nellie McClung who successfully campaigned for women’s suffrage in Canada. Are any of these linkages accurate? Would you please explore this topic?
Reply from Quote Investigator: The earliest full match located by QI appeared in 1895 within an article in “The Journal of Education” of London by the English writer Lionel Arthur Tollemache. The piece presented Tollemache’s memories of Benjamin Jowett who had died a couple years earlier at age 76. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:1
On another occasion he said to me: “A friend of mine of great practical ability told me that he has laid down for himself three rules of conduct. Never retract. Never explain. Get it done and let them howl.” Jowett repeated these paradoxical maxims with a characteristic laugh, which seemed at any rate not to mark disapproval.
Jowett helped to popularize the remark, but he disclaimed credit for it. Hence, the name of the creator remains uncertain. QI believes the remark evolved over time, and it was assembled from preexisting fragments. Elbert Hubbard mentioned the saying, but he credited Jowett. Nellie McClung employed the third statement during a speech in 1924, but the saying was already in circulation.
Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.
Niels Bohr? Edward Teller? Werner Heisenberg? W. P. Northrup? Benjamin Stolberg? Harry M. Meacham? Eugene Kane? Anonymous?
Question for Quote Investigator: Expertise is often acquired by learning from a series of errors. Here are three pertinent statements whose meanings diverge. The similarities suggest that these remarks still belong in the same family:
(1) An expert is a person who has found out by his own painful experience all the mistakes that one can make in a very narrow field.
(2) An expert is someone who knows some of the worst mistakes that can be made in his subject and how to avoid them.
(3) I’ve made all the mistakes that are possible. The net result of that should be expert.
The first item has been attributed to nuclear scientist Edward Teller and Danish physicist Niels Bohr. The second item has been credited to German theoretical physicist Werner Heisenberg. Would you please explore this topic?
Reply from Quote Investigator: The earliest match for the first item known to QI appeared in “LIFE” magazine in 1954 within a profile of Edward Teller who ascribed an instance to Niels Bohr. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:1
But mistakes do not inhibit him. He likes to quote the dictum of Niels Bohr, the great Danish physicist, that, “An expert is a person who has found out by his own painful experience all the mistakes that one can make in a very narrow field.”
The earliest match for the second item known to QI appeared in a 1952 essay by Werner Heisenberg titled “Positivismus, Metaphysik und Religion” (“Positivism, Metaphysics and Religion”). Here is an excerpt translated into English:2
Many people will tell you that an expert is someone who knows a great deal about his subject. To this I would object that no one can ever know very much about any subject. I would much prefer the following definition: an expert is someone who knows some of the worst mistakes that can be made in his subject, and how to avoid them.
The earliest match for this general family of sayings located by QI appeared in “The Chicago Medical Recorder” in 1904 within an article by Professor of Pediatrics W. P. Northrup of New York University who had become adept at diagnosing and treating pneumonia in infants:3
My one admirer kindly spoke of me, he being in an amiable mood, as an expert in this diagnosis. “Yes,” I agreed, which took him aback, “I’ve made all the mistakes that are possible.” The net result of that should be expert.
Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.
Oscar Wilde? Robert Wilson? Apocryphal? Question for Quote Investigator: Major works of art are complex, ambiguous, and difficult to interpret. The vitality of a piece is compromised when a single meaning is imposed on it. Apparently, an artist once said something like this:
The moment you understand a great work of art, it’s dead for you.
This remark has been attributed to the famous Irish wit Oscar Wilde and the prominent U.S. theater director Robert Wilson. I am skeptical of the linkage to Wilde. Would you please help me to find the correct ascription together with a citation?
Reply from Quote Investigator: The earliest match known to QI appeared in “The New York Times” in May 1990. The article reported on a new experimental production of Shakespeare’s “King Lear” in Frankfurt, Germany helmed by Robert Wilson who was described as “the P. T. Barnum of the avant-garde”. Wilson employed the quotation while discussing “King Lear”. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:1
“The work is a hall of mirrors, and the kaleidoscope of reflections intrigues me. Another reason I want to do the play is because we don’t understand it. The moment you think you understand a great work of art, it’s dead for you.”
QI has found no evidence that Oscar Wilde employed this expression. The quotation does not appear in “The Wit & Wisdom of Oscar Wilde” compiled by Ralph Keyes,2 nor does it occur in “Oscar Wilde in Quotation: 3,100 Insults, Anecdotes, and Aphorisms” compiled by Tweed Conrad.3
Below are additional selected citations together with a conjecture about the genesis of the misattribution to Oscar Wilde.
In 1894 Oscar Wilde contributed a collection of witticisms titled “Phrases and Philosophies for the Use of the Young” to a student periodical. Below are three of the items. One remark suggested that understanding a religion via science could lead to its death:4
A really well-made buttonhole is the only link between Art and Nature.
Religions die when they are proved to be true. Science is the record of dead religions.
The well-bred contradict other people. The wise contradict themselves.
Robert Wilson’s comment about art was noticed by a journalist at “The Observer” of London. In May 1990 the quotation appeared in a section called “Sayings of the week”.5 Later, in December 1990 the newspaper listed Wilson’s statement in “Sayings of the year”:6
The moment you think you understand a great work of art, it’s dead for you. — Robert Wilson, theatre director.
QI hypothesizes that the misattribution to Oscar Wilde was due to a misreading of two adjacent entries in the 1993 reference “The Columbia Dictionary of Quotations”. The first entry was for a quotation by Oscar Wilde and the next entry was for a quotation by Robert Wilson:7
123 Bad art is a great deal worse than no art at all.
OSCAR WILDE (1854–1900). Anglo-Irish playwright, author. “House Decoration,” lecture, 1882 (published in Aristotle at Afternoon Tea: The Rare Oscar Wilde, 1991).
124 The moment you think you understand a great work of art, it’s dead for you.
ROBERT WILSON (b. 1941). U.S. theater director, designer. Quoted in: International Herald Tribune (Paris, 22 May 1990).
One or more readers of the above passage were attracted to the name of Oscar Wilde whose fame eclipses that of Wilson. These readers carelessly reassigned Wilson’s quotation to Wilde. This behavior fits a known error mechanism for the generation of misattributions.
In 2003 the quotation with a correct attribution continued to circulate in the “Star Tribune” of Minneapolis, Minnesota:8
TODAY’S QUOTE “The moment you think you understand a great work of art, it’s dead for you.” — Robert Wilson, U.S. theater director.
In 2006 “The Village Voice” of New York published “The Whole Ball of Wax — Can Art Change the World? A Holistic Theory” by Jerry Saltz which credited the quotation to Oscar Wilde:9
These latter-day Cartesians act like coroners, regularly pronouncing dead that which they don’t approve of or can’t explain. They say the author is dead, painting is dead, history is dead, and so on. As Midgley points out, ‘Imaginative-systems don’t suddenly perish and they don’t go away until the things they were invented to deal with have been resolved.’ Or as Oscar Wilde remarked, ‘The moment you think you understand a work of art it’s dead for you.’
In 2012 the “Family & Home Examiner” published a set of statements about art:10
It can be beautiful. It can be ugly. It can move you to feel a certain way and provoke you. Today’s quotes are about art and how it makes us think. . . . “The moment you think you understand a great work of art, it’s dead for you.” -Oscar Wilde
In conclusion, Robert Wilson should receive credit for this quotation based on the 1990 citation in “The New York Times”. The attribution to Oscar Wilde is unsupported.
Image Note: Picture of the 1889 oil painting titled “The Starry Night” by Vincent van Gogh.
Acknowledgement: Great thanks to Isaiah Campbell whose inquiry led QI to formulate this question and perform this exploration. Campbell pointed to the citation in “The New York Times” and was skeptical of the attribution to Oscar Wilde.
1990 May 20, New York Times, ‘Lear’ Girds for a Remarkable Episode by Arthur Holmberg, Quote Page H7, Column 1, New York. (ProQuest) ↩︎
1996, The Wit & Wisdom of Oscar Wilde, Compiled by Ralph Keyes, Note: Quotation with phrase “dead for you” was absent in this reference, HarperCollins Publishers, New York. (Verified with hardcopy) ↩︎
2006, Oscar Wilde in Quotation: 3,100 Insults, Anecdotes, and Aphorisms, Topically Arranged with Attributions, Compiled and edited by Tweed Conrad, Note: Quotation with phrase “dead for you” was absent in this reference, McFarland & Company Inc., Jefferson, North Carolina. (Verified with scans) ↩︎
1894, The Chameleon, Volume 1, Number 1, Edited by John Francis Bloxam, Article: Phrases and Philosophies for the Use of the Young by Oscar Wilde, Start Page 1, Quote Page 1, Gay and Bird, London. (British Library website; accessed bl.uk on November 10, 2021) link↩︎
1990 May 27, The Observer, Sayings of the week, Quote Page 18, Column 2, London, England. (Newspapers_com) ↩︎
1990 December 30, The Observer, Sayings of the year, Quote Page 16, Column 7, London, England. (Newspapers_com) ↩︎
1993, The Columbia Dictionary of Quotations, Edited by Robert Andrews, Topic: Art, Quote Page 61, Column 1, Columbia University Press, New York. (Verified with scans) ↩︎
2003 January 19, Star Tribune, Today’s Quote, Quote Page F1, Column 2, Minneapolis, Minnesota. (Newspapers_com) ↩︎
2006 September 5, The Village Voice, Section: Art, The Whole Ball of Wax — Can Art Change the World? A Holistic Theory by Jerry Saltz, Unspecified Page Number, New York, New York. (NewsBank Access World News) ↩︎
2012 May 17, Family & Home Examiner, Section: Quotations Examiner, Quotes about art, Unspecified Page Number, U.S.A. (NewsBank Access World News) ↩︎
Paul Samuelson? Andrew Fletcher of Saltoun? Percy Bysshe Shelley? Mary Shelley? Sylvia Nasar?
Question for Quote Investigator: The cultural impact of economic thought has been enormous. Apparently, a famous economist once said something like this:
I don’t care who writes a nation’s laws if I can write its economic textbooks.
Would you please help me to identify this economist and find a citation?
Reply from Quote Investigator: Nobel-Prize winning economist Paul Samuelson published the perennially popular textbook “Economics” beginning in 1948. Twenty editions have appeared during subsequent decades.
In 1990 Samuelson wrote the foreword to “The Principles of Economics Course: A Handbook for Instructors”, and he employed the quotation. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:1
“Poets are the unacknowledged legislators of the World.” It was a poet who said that, exercising occupational license. Some sage, it may have been I, declared in similar vein: “I don’t care who writes a nation’s laws—or crafts its advanced treaties—if I can write its economic textbooks.” The first lick is the privileged one, impinging on the beginner’s tabula rasa at its most impressionable state.
Paul Samuelson’s phrasing was humorously tentative, but QI believes that he deserves credit for the remark under examination. When Samuelson crafted his remark he was deliberately alluding to a family of previous remarks about the powerful cultural influence of music and poetry.
Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.
Herbert Beerbohm Tree? Hendrik Willem van Loon? E. V. Lucas? Charles Haddon Spurgeon? Robert Oliver Jones? Lord Palmerston? Cedric Hardwicke? Robert Copeland?
Question for Quote Investigator: Committees are common tools for decision making, but detractors have highlighted their inefficiency, unimaginativeness, and inflexibility. Here are four examples from a pertinent family of humorous remarks:
(1) The best committee is a committee of three with two of them ill in bed.
(2) A committee should consist of three people, two of whom are absent.
(3) Nothing is accomplished by a committee unless it consists of three members, one of whom happens to be sick and another absent.
(4) The ideal committee is a committee of two when one of them is absent.
English theatre manager Herbert Beerbohm Tree, English humorist E. V. Lucas, and Dutch historian Hendrik Willem van Loon have each received credit for quips of this type. Would you please explore the provenance of this family of jokes?
Reply from Quote Investigator: The earliest match located by QI appeared in an October 1878 article published in “The Western Daily Press” of Bristol, England. Prominent religious figure Charles Haddon Spurgeon spoke at the annual session of the Baptist Union held in Leeds. He discussed the desirability of continual progress which he emphasized by using the catchphrase “drive on”. Boldface added to excepts by QI:1
He liked committees for such work. Oh, yes; but the best committee was a committee of three, and two of them ill in bed. (Laughter.) Let the third man take the reins, and so drive on.
Spurgeon deserves credit for popularizing this joke. Also, based on current evidence he initiated this family of quips although it remains possible he was repeating an existing remark.
Herbert Beerbohm Tree received credit for an instance in 1920. Hendrik Willem van Loon used an instance in 1927. E. V. Lucas employed an instance in 1931. Others have delivered versions of this popular jest.
Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.
Alan Turing? Arthur Eddington? Andrew Hodges? Robin Gandy? John D. Barrow? Dermot Turing? Apocryphal?
Question for Quote Investigator: Apparently, the pioneering computer scientist Alan Turing once compared scientific knowledge to a differential equation and suggested that religion specified a boundary condition for the equation. I have not seen a precise citation. Would you please explore this topic?
Reply from Quote Investigator: In 1983 British mathematician Andrew Hodges published a biography titled “Alan Turing: The Enigma”. Hodges stated that in March 1954 Alan Turing sent four postcards to his friend and colleague Robin Gandy. The second postcard (partially shown below) contained the following lines. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:1
Messages from the Unseen World
III. The Universe is the interior of the Light Cone of the Creation
IV. Science is a Differential Equation. Religion is a Boundary Condition.
Arthur Stanley
The postcard also contained the following line written sideways in the left margin:
? Does the gravitation constant decrease ?
Turing’s message presented a playful interpretation of contemporary cosmological theories. The line “Arthur Stanley” referred to English astronomer Arthur Stanley Eddington, and the beginning line perhaps alluded to Eddington’s 1929 book “Science and the Unseen World”. Gandy stated that he and Turing had been discussing Eddington’s book titled “Fundamental Theory”.2
QI conjectures that Turing’s statement was an analogy. A differential equation may have many possible solutions. A boundary condition is an extra constraint that reduces the number of possible solutions and sometimes specifies a unique solution. The postcard statement suggested that there were many possible universes that were compatible with the latest scientific knowledge. Religious beliefs provided additional assumptions that further constrained the set of possible universes.
Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.
John Lennon? Oscar Wilde? Fernando Sabino? Paulo Coelho? Domingos Sabino? Farah Khan? Anonymous?
Question for Quote Investigator: Here are three versions of a popular remark that reflects an unwaveringly upbeat perspective on life:
(1) Everything is OK in the end; if it’s not OK it’s not the end.
(2) Everything is going to be fine in the end. If it’s not fine it’s not the end.
(3) Everything will be all right in the end; so if it is not all right, it is not yet the end.
This saying has been attributed to the well-known Irish wit Oscar Wilde, the famous English musician John Lennon, the prominent Brazilian writer Fernando Sabino, the best-selling Brazilian author Paulo Coelho, and other individuals. The statement has also been credited to the 1999-2005 U.S. television series “Judging Amy” and the 2011 U.K. film “The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel”. I have not seen any convincing evidence identifying the origin. Would you please explore this topic?
Reply from Quote Investigator: The earliest match located by QI appeared in the 1988 Brazilian Portuguese book “O tabuleiro de damas” (“The checkerboard”) by Fernando Sabino. The author ascribed the saying to his father Domingos Sabino. Here is the key passage followed by a translation into English. Boldface added to excepts by QI:1
O melhor, talvez, que me lembre, foi o que me disse um dia em que me encontrou entregue à aflição de espírito: “Meu filho, tudo no fim dá certo. Se não deu, é porque ainda não chegou ao fim.”
Perhaps the best thing that I can remember is what he said to me one day when he found me in the grip of a mental affliction: “My son, everything works out in the end. If it didn’t, it’s because it hasn’t come to an end yet.”
The earliest attributions to Oscar Wilde and John Lennon occurred posthumously. Thus, those linkages were probably spurious. The first attribution to Paulo Coelho occurred many years after 1988. Evidence supports the presence of the adage in “Judging Amy” and “The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel”, but the saying was already in circulation.
Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.
Ayn Rand? R. M. Bevensee? Merle Haggard? Tom McCahill?
Question for Quote Investigator: Consider the following list of four items: octopus, pineapple, pencil, and kangaroo. The final comma is referred to as a serial comma, and some style manuals argue that it should be omitted. This comma is also called an Oxford or Harvard comma. The omission of serial commas occasionally leads to hilarious results. Here are four examples I have seen:
(1) Book dedication: Dedicated to my parents, Ayn Rand and God.
(2) His global tour include encounters with Nelson Mandela, an 800-year-old demigod and a dildo collector.
(3) Among those interviewed were his two ex-wives, Kris Kristofferson and Robert Duvall.
(4) My car was loaded to the gunwales with heavy luggage, two dogs and my wife.
The first example suggests that the author was the product of a union between a famous philosopher and a deity. In this comical interpretation, the phrase “Ayn Rand and God” functions as an appositive which provides a further description of the noun “parents”. Hence, one parent is Ayn Rand, and the other parent is God.
The other three examples also engender ludicrous interpretations. Did a naïve writer construct any of these statements? Which of these statements was crafted by a humorist?
Reply from Quote Investigator: The earliest match known to QI for the first statement appeared in the 1964 book “Electromagnetic Slow Wave Systems” by R. M. Bevensee who was an Assistant Professor of Electrical Engineering, University of California Berkeley. The dedication was written on four lines, and the author employed a serial comma. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:1
This Book is Dedicated to my parents, Ayn Rand, and the glory of GOD
QI conjectures that the lines above inspired an unknown person to construct an apocryphal shortened comical version without the serial comma. In 1997 a message posted to the Usenet newsgroup alt.books.reviews contained an instance of this joke:2
Among copyeditors, a favorite argument in support of the “serial comma” (i.e. the comma that comes just before the ‘and’ in a series of three items or more) is demonstrated by a supposed dedication in someone else’s work. Whether apocryphal or not I dunno. Anyway, it was supposedly published as —
. Dedicated to my parents, Ayn Rand and God
In November 1998 “The Sunday Times” of London published a capsule summary of a television series called “Planet Ustinov” hosted by the British actor and raconteur Peter Ustinov. The following passage provided a genuine example of unintentional humor because it omitted the serial comma:3
By train, plane and sedan chair, Peter Ustinov retraces a journey made by Mark Twain a century ago. The highlights of his global tour include encounters with Nelson Mandela, an 800-year-old demigod and a dildo collector.
In December 1998 “The Guardian” printed a collection of items from other newspapers titled “Your Favourite Cuttings”. The clipping above appeared with the following description:4
Nelson Mandela as you have never seen him before. From an unfortunate television preview in the Times, November 22
In 2005 the apocryphal dedication mentioning Ayn Rand continued to circulate via the book “The Revenge of Anguished English: More Accidental Assaults Upon Our Language” by Richard Lederer:5
If you ever need an exhibit to bolster your argument for use of the serial comma — the one that’s inserted before and, as in “red, white, and blue” — simply turn to the following book dedication: “To my parents, Ayn Rand and God.”
In 2010 the “Los Angeles Times” published a piece about a new documentary covering the life of country music singer and songwriter Merle Haggard. Beneath the picture of Haggard was a caption that provided another genuine example of unintentional humor:6
MERLE HAGGARD: The documentary was filmed over three years. Among those interviewed were his two ex-wives, Kris Kristofferson and Robert Duvall.
In 2012 columnist Robert Fulford of the “National Post” in Toronto, Canada published an article about the Oxford comma:7
One member of the pro-Oxford faction claims to have found the ultimate proof in a line from a newspaper story about a documentary on Merle Haggard: “Among those interviewed were his two ex-wives, Kris Kristofferson and Robert Duvall.” In that sentence (traditionalists argue) one curly little Oxford comma after Kristofferson would have cleared up what otherwise looked like a bizarre error.
In 2014 “The Times” of London pointed to the 1998 example:8
Why punctuation matters
“Highlights of [Peter Ustinov’s] global tour include encounters with Nelson Mandela, an 800-year-old demigod and a dildo collector” (The Sunday Times TV listings, 1998)
In March 1960 “Mechanix Illustrated” published an article entitled “The Oldsmobile” by Tom McCahill. The author described an incident during which he narrowly avoided an accident:9
A guy in a little old car was creeping along ahead of me with one wheel in the gutter. I pulled toward the center of the road to pass him. Suddenly, without any signal whatsoever, this character made a hard left turn directly across my path. My car was loaded to the gunwales with heavy luggage, two dogs and my wife. By making his left turn, the other car had completely blocked the two lanes of highway.
An August 1960 “Mechanix Illustrated” published a letter sent to Tom McCahill about the ambiguity of the sentence he composed in March 1960:10
Just read your report on the ’60 Olds and was struck by the statement, “My car was loaded to the gunwales with heavy luggage, two dogs and my wife.” A series of articles in a sentence should be separated by commas to clarify the meaning—or were you describing the heavy luggage as being the two dogs and your wife?
McCahill responded to the letter with the simple two word interrogative: “What else?”
In summary, current evidence indicates that the first example is apocryphal. The second example is genuine; it appeared in “The Sunday Times” in 1998. The third example is genuine; it appeared in the “Los Angeles Times” in 2010. The fourth example is genuine; it appeared in “Mechanix Illustrated” in 1960.
Image Notes: Illustration of three commas.
Acknowledgement: Thanks to Language Log, Richard Lederer, Ben Yagoda, and Benjamin Dreyer who have all presented examples from this set to illustrate the serial comma. Special thanks to @jondanziger, Stephen Goranson, @miss_reading, @chris_bloke, and @BillEllson who all helped QI obtain information about citations for this article. Also, thanks to David Daniel who told QI about a typo. In addition, thanks to James Landau who mentioned the 1960 example and pointed toward the two citations.
Update History: On July 15, 2024 the March 1960 citation was added to the article. On July 16, 2024 the August 1960 citation was added to the article.
1964 Copyright, Electromagnetic Slow Wave Systems by R. M. Bevensee (Assistant Professor of Electrical Engineering, University of California Berkeley), (Dedication page of book), Unnumbered Page, John Wiley & Sons, New York. (Verified with scans) ↩︎
February 3, 1997, Usenet discussion message, Newsgroup: alt.books.reviews, From: ed.n…@syslink.mcs.com, Subject: ayn rand? (Google Groups Search; Accessed December 18, 2022) link↩︎
1998 November 22, The Sunday Times, The week in view: Best Travelogue — Planet Ustinov, Quote Page 29, Column 3, London, England. (Gale Historical Archive of The Sunday Times) ↩︎
1998 December 19, The Guardian, Section: The Editor, Your Favourite Cuttings, Quote Page 10, Column 2, London, England. (Newspapers_com) ↩︎
2005, The Revenge of Anguished English: More Accidental Assaults Upon Our Language by Richard Lederer, Chapter: Extra-Tasty Grammar Crackers, Quote Page 163, St. Martin’s Press, New York. (Verified with scans) ↩︎
2010 July 21, Los Angeles Times, Television Review: Haggard — candid as ever by Randy Lewis, Quote Page D10, Column 2, Los Angeles, California. (Newspapers_com) ↩︎
2012 September 11, National Post, Grammer, grammar & preppy vampires by Robert Fulford (Notebook), Quote Page AL9, Column 5, Toronto, Ontario, Canada. (Newspapers_com) ↩︎
2014 February 8, The Times, Why the comma is heading towards its own full stop by Oliver Moody, Quote Page 21, Column 1, London, England. (Gale The Times Archive) ↩︎
1960 March, Mechanix Illustrated, The Oldsmobile by Tom McCahill, Start Page 92, Quote Page 94 and 168, Fawcett Publications, Greenwich, Connecticut. (Verified with scans) ↩︎
1960 August, Mechanix Illustrated, Section: Mail For McCahill, Letter from: Onus M. Comer of Novato, California, Start Page 49, Quote Page 52, Column 1, Fawcett Publications, Greenwich, Connecticut. (Verified with scans) ↩︎
Question for Quote Investigator: Sports contests are often highly competitive, but one does not expect to find bitter rivalry and ambition in a genteel craft. Here are two versions of a statement that highlights this incongruity:
(1) If you think squash is a competitive activity try flower arrangement.
(2) If you think squash is a competitive activity try flower-arranging.
Would you please help me to find the origin of this humorous statement and the correct phrasing?
Reply from Quote Investigator: English playwright and screenwriter Alan Bennett authored a group of six monologues for BBC television in 1987. The works were published under the title “Talking Heads” by BBC Books in 1988. The prominent actress Maggie Smith played the role of Susan who was a vicar’s wife for the second monologue titled “Bed Among the Lentils”. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:1
I’m even a fool at the flower arrangement. I ought to have a PhD in the subject the number of classes I’ve been to but still my efforts show as much evidence of art as walking sticks in an umbrella stand. Actually it’s temperament. I don’t have it. If you think squash is a competitive activity try flower arrangement.
Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.
Arthur Conan Doyle? Sherlock Holmes? Diane Ackerman? Jeremy Withers? Apocryphal?
Question for Quote Investigator: Arthur Conan Doyle, the creator of Sherlock Holmes, was a bicycle enthusiast. He suggested that taking a spin down the road on a bicycle would dispel feelings of discouragement and unhappiness. I do not know the precise phrasing Conan Doyle used. Would you please help me to find a citation?
Reply from Quote Investigator: In May 1895 “Demorest’s Family Magazine” of New York published a piece titled “What Are the Benefits of Bicycling?”, and a section called “Testimony of an Enthusiast” printed the following words from Arthur Conan Doyle. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:1
When the spirits are low, when the day appears dark, when work becomes monotonous, when hopes seem hardly worth having, just mount a bicycle and go for a good spin down the road, without thought of anything but the ride you are taking.
I have myself ridden the bicycle most during my practice as a physician and during my work in letters. In the morning or the afternoon, before or after work, as the mood o’ertakes me, I mount the wheel and am off for a spin of a few miles up or down the road from my country place. I can only speak words of praise for the bicycle, for I believe that its use is commonly beneficial and not at all detrimental to health, except in the matter of beginners who overdo it.
The bicycle craze seems to me to be only in its infancy, for probably in time we shall witness the spectacle of our business men going to their offices mounted on the bicycle, instead of using the tramways.
Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.
In October 1895 the London periodical “Cycling” reprinted the first two paragraphs of the passage above with a short introduction:2
DR. CONAN DOYLE, the popular author, and creator of Sherlock Holmes, is a cyclist, and writes thus sensibly and enthusiastically about the pastime: — “When the spirits are low, when the day appears dark, when work becomes monotonous, when hope seems hardly worth having, just mount a bicycle and go out for a good spin down the road, without thought of anything but the ride you are taking . . .”
The words were also reprinted in several other newspapers and magazines such as “Scientific American”3 of New York in January 1896 and “The Wheelwoman”4 of London in November 1896.
In 1999 U.S. poet and essayist Diane Ackerman published “Deep Play”, and she published a slightly altered version of the passage. The phrase “good spin” became “spin”:5
So many artists have been inspired by the bicycle it would take a separate book to consider them all. There are dozens of writers alone. Arthur Conan Doyle relied on his beloved bicycle to give him inspiration for his Sherlock Holmes mysteries. “When the spirits are low, when the day appears dark, when work becomes monotonous, when hope hardly seems worth having,” he advised, “just mount a bicycle and go out for a spin down the road, without thought on anything but the ride you are taking.”
The statement has continued to circulate in modern times. The 2017 book “The War of the Wheels: H. G. Wells and the Bicycle” by Jeremy Withers included this passage:6
An 1896 issue of Scientific American shows Conan Doyle confessing to his own frequent practice of cycling and declaring a belief that “[w]hen the spirits are low, when the day appears dark, when work becomes monotonous, when hope hardly seems worth having” all one needs to do is “just mount a bicycle and go out for a spin down the road.”
In conclusion, Arthur Conan Doyle deserves credit for the enthusiastic comments he made about bicycling published in May 1895. His words have been reprinted many times during the ensuing years. Occasionally, the statements have been slightly altered.
Image Notes: Silhouette of a person on a bicycle from renategranade0 at Pixabay.
Acknowledgments: Great thanks to John Neal, Mardy Grothe, and Clint Von Gundy who inquired about a thematically related quotation attributed to H. G. Wells. QI encountered the remark from Conan Doyle while conducting research, and QI decided to formulate this question and perform this exploration.
1895 May, Demorest’s Family Magazine, Volume 31, Number 7, What Are the Benefits of Bicycling?: Testimony of an Enthusiast: Dr. A. Conan Doyle (Physician, Lecturer and Author), Quote Page 383, Column 1, W. Jennings Demorest, New York. (Google Books Full View) link↩︎
1895 October 19, Cycling, Conan Doyle On Cycling, Quote Page 222 (28), Column 2, London, England. (British Newspaper Archive) ↩︎
1896 January 18, Scientific American, Volume 74, Number 3, Cycle Notes, Quote Page 38, Column 3, Munn & Company, New York. (Google Books Full View) link↩︎
1896 November 28, The Wheelwoman, Medical Opinion in Favour of Women Cycling, Quote Page 28, Column 1 and 2, London, England. (Newspapers_com) ↩︎
1999, Deep Play by Diane Ackerman, Chapter Six: Creating Minds, Quote Page 133, Random House, New York. (Verified with scans) ↩︎
2017, The War of the Wheels: H. G. Wells and the Bicycle by Jeremy Withers, Chapter: Introduction, Quote Page 5, Syracuse University Press, Syracuse, New York. (Google Books Preview) ↩︎