If You Don’t Like Our Weather, Just Wait a Few Minutes

Mark Twain? Will Rogers? Ring Lardner? James A. Cruikshank? T. Morris Longstreth? Anonymous?

Dear Quote Investigator: Two famous humorists, Mark Twain and Will Rogers, have each received credit for a statement about the variability of weather. Here are four instances:

(1) If you don’t like our weather, wait a minute.

(2) If you don’t like the weather in New England, just wait a few minutes.

(3) If you don’t like the Kansas weather today just wait a day and probably tomorrow will suit.

(4) If you don’t like the present brand of Nebraska weather just wait fifteen minutes and there will be a different kind of weather.

Did either Twain or Rogers really employ this expression? Would you please explore this topic?

Quote Investigator: The earliest match located by QI appeared in “Field and Stream” magazine in January 1909 within an article by James A. Cruikshank who indicated that the saying was circulating in Chicago, Illinois with an anonymous attribution. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:[1]1909 January, Field and Stream, Volume 13, Number 9, Where To Go Hunting, Fishing & Resorts of The United States & Canada by Jas. A. Cruikshank, Start Page 794, Quote Page 794, Column 2, … Continue reading

In Chicago—where they have a saying “If you do not like our weather, wait a minute”—it seems to a good many of us that, after waiting several weeks of winter, we like the latest weather less than the earlier.

Researchers have been unable to find this saying in the writings and speeches of Mark Twain. He died in 1910, and the earliest known attribution to him appeared a decade later in 1920. Will Rogers died in 1935, and the saying was ascribed to him in 1940. Based on current evidence, the originator of this remark remains anonymous.

Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.

Continue reading “If You Don’t Like Our Weather, Just Wait a Few Minutes”

References

References
↑1 1909 January, Field and Stream, Volume 13, Number 9, Where To Go Hunting, Fishing & Resorts of The United States & Canada by Jas. A. Cruikshank, Start Page 794, Quote Page 794, Column 2, Field and Stream Publishing Company, New York. (Google Books Full View) link

A Person Might Drown While Attempting To Cross a Stream With an Average Depth of Six Inches

W. I. E. Gates? Edward Latham? Bihar Proverb? Washburn Hopkins? R. H. Halsey? Bolton Hall? Anonymous?

Dear Quote Investigator: Statistical averages can be misleading. The maximum and minimum values are not specified when only an average is presented. Here are three versions of a pertinent adage:

(1) A person can drown while crossing a stream with an average depth of six inches.

(2) A six foot tall statistician once drowned in a river with an average depth of only two feet.

(3) An ox drowned in a stream whose average depth was only sufficient to cover the hoof.

This saying has been attributed to W. I. E. Gates, but I have been unable to find a solid citation. Would you please explore this topic?

Quote Investigator: The earliest match located by QI appeared within an 1891 book about proverbs in Bihar, India. The explanation of one proverb referred to a “Kāyath”, a person who worked as clerk, copyist, or calculator. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:[1]1891, Behar Proverbs: Classified and Arranged by John Christian, Class 3, Proverbs Relating To Peculiarities and Traits, Characteristic of Certain Castes and Classes, Quote Page 119 and 120, Kegan … Continue reading

Once a Kāyath, with his son, was going on a journey. He came to a stream. As he was uncertain of its depth, he proceeded to sound it; and having discovered the depth to be variable, he struck an average. The average depth being what his son could ford, he ordered him, unhesitatingly, to walk through the stream, with the sad consequence that the boy was drowned.

W. I. E. Gates received credit for an instance in 1977, but that was many years after the saying had entered circulation. A detailed citation is given further below.

Here are additional selected citations in chronological order.

Continue reading “A Person Might Drown While Attempting To Cross a Stream With an Average Depth of Six Inches”

References

References
↑1 1891, Behar Proverbs: Classified and Arranged by John Christian, Class 3, Proverbs Relating To Peculiarities and Traits, Characteristic of Certain Castes and Classes, Quote Page 119 and 120, Kegan Paul, Trench, Trübner & Company, London. (Google Books Full View) link

The Radio Is a Distraction and Keeps You from Concentrating

Nikola Tesla? Apocryphal?

Dear Quote Investigator: The electrical engineer Nikola Tesla became famous via his inventions in the domains of alternating current and wireless communication. Apparently, he disliked broadcast radio programs. He considered radio to be a nuisance and a distraction which impeded his concentration. Would you please help me to find a citation?

Quote Investigator: In 1932 Nikola Tesla celebrated his 76th birthday, and the “New York Herald Tribune” interviewed him in his residence at the Governor Clinton Hotel in New York City. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:[1]1932 July 10, New York Herald Tribune, Tesla, at 76, Calls Radio His Despised ‘Child’: It Is a Nuisance and Distraction, Says Inventor of Electrical Devices, Quote Page 11, Column 4, New … Continue reading

This hotel has a radio in every room. But Mr. Tesla’s complaint was not so much a matter of his neighbor’s music as it was a matter of personal taste.

“The radio, I know I’m its father, but I don’t like it,” he said. “I just don’t like it. It’s a nuisance. I never listen to it. The radio is a distraction and keeps you from concentrating. There are too many distractions in this life for quality of thought; and it’s quality of thought, not quantity, that counts.”

Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.

Continue reading “The Radio Is a Distraction and Keeps You from Concentrating”

References

References
↑1 1932 July 10, New York Herald Tribune, Tesla, at 76, Calls Radio His Despised ‘Child’: It Is a Nuisance and Distraction, Says Inventor of Electrical Devices, Quote Page 11, Column 4, New York. (ProQuest)

Short Reviews: “Smile, Smile, Smile” “I Didn’t, I Didn’t, I Didn’t”

Clive Barnes? Richard Bentley? Charles Hayward? John Francis Hope? A. Walkely? Wolcott Gibbs? Apocryphal?

Dear Quote Investigator: One-line theatrical reviews are simultaneously hilarious and unfairly dismissive. A grumpy critic who saw the Broadway show “Smile, Smile, Smile” responded with “I Didn’t, I Didn’t, I Didn’t”. Another disgruntled critic saw “A Terrible Night” and declared “Quite so”. Would you please explore this topic of short pungent reviews.

Quote Investigator: Here is a collection of show names followed by terse reviews. Each date corresponds to the year the citation mentioning the review appeared. Some shows and reviews are apocryphal:

1917: A Terrible Night. Quite so.
1920: Pure As Snow. It is not as pure as snow.
1921: An Awful Night. Quite so.
1921: What a Night! Exactly.
1933: A Moral Crime. It was!
1959: Dreadful Night. Precisely!
1959: Oh, Yes! Oh, No!
1965: Wham! Ouch!
1973: Smile, Smile, Smile. I Didn’t, I Didn’t, I Didn’t.
1979: The Cupboard. Bare.

Below are additional selected citations in chronological order. The discussion begins with compact reviews of a poem and a book.

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Celebrity Is the Chastisement of Merit and the Punishment of Talent

Nicolas Chamfort? Emily Dickinson? Franz Liszt? Garrison Keillor? Apocryphal?

Dear Quote Investigator: The dark side of celebrity is now widely recognized. Celebrity worship encourages self-absorption, arrogance, and callousness while celebrity hatred causes denouncements, calumnies, and physical endangerment. The following saying has been attributed to the eighteenth century French epigrammatist Nicolas Chamfort and the nineteenth century poet Emily Dickinson. Here are two versions:

(1) Celebrity is the chastisement of merit and the punishment of talent.
(2) Celebrity is the reproof of merit and the punishment of genius.

Would you please help me to determine the author and find a citation.

Quote Investigator: Nicolas Chamfort died in 1794. A collection of his writings appeared in 1796 under the title “Maximes, Pensées, Caractères et Anecdotes” (“Maxims, Thoughts, Characters and Anecdotes”). The adage appeared in a section titled “Pensées Morales” (“Moral Thoughts”). Boldface added to excerpts by QI:[1]1796, Maximes, Pensées, Caractères et Anecdotes (Maxims, Thoughts, Characters and Anecdotes) by Nicolas Chamfort, Chapitre 5: Pensées Morales, Quote Page 88 and 89, Published in Paris and … Continue reading

La célébrité est le châtiment du mérite & la punition du talent. Le mien, quelqu’il soit, ne me paraît qu’un délateur, né pour troubler mon repos. J’éprouve, en le détruisant, la joie de triompher d’un ennemi. Le sentiment a triomphé chez moi de l’amour-propre même, & la vanité littéraire a péri dans la destruction de l’intérêt que je prenais aux hommes.

Here is one possible translation:

Celebrity is the chastisement of merit and the punishment of talent. Mine, whatever it is, seems to me only an informer, born to disturb my rest. I experience, in destroying it, the joy of triumphing over an enemy. My sensibility has triumphed over my self-love, and literary vanity has perished in the destruction of my preoccupation with men.

Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.

Continue reading “Celebrity Is the Chastisement of Merit and the Punishment of Talent”

References

References
↑1 1796, Maximes, Pensées, Caractères et Anecdotes (Maxims, Thoughts, Characters and Anecdotes) by Nicolas Chamfort, Chapitre 5: Pensées Morales, Quote Page 88 and 89, Published in Paris and reprinted with T. Baylis, located at J. Deboffe, London (Google Books Full View) link

Theatrical Show: “Wham!”; Review: “Ouch!”

Wolcott Gibbs? Alexander Woollcott? Else Rempel? Thomas Vinciguerra? Guinness Book of World Records? Apocryphal?

Dear Quote Investigator: I love stories about funny theatrical reviews. A prominent critic once attended a performance of a show called “Wham!” and published the amusingly concise evaluation “Ouch!”

This pithy critique has been attributed to Wolcott Gibbs and Alexander Woollcott who both wrote for “The New Yorker” magazine. Yet, I suspect that this anecdote is fictitious. Would you please explore this topic?

Quote Investigator: The Internet Broadway Database (IBDB) provides no matches for “Wham!” which reduces the credibility of the tale. Alexander Woollcott died in 1943, and Wolcott Gibbs died in 1958.

The earliest match found by QI appeared in “The Edmonton Journal” of Alberta, Canada in 1965 within a column titled “Else Rempel’s Edmonton Notebook” which printed the following short item. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:[1] 1965 January 14, The Edmonton Journal, Else Rempel’s Edmonton Notebook: For What It’s Worth, Quote Page 6, Column 1, Edmonton, Alberta, Canada. (Newspapers_com)

For What It’s Worth
The shortest criticism in theatrical history was made by drama critic Wolcott Gibbs when he reviewed a farce called Wham!
Gibbs’ only comment was “Ouch!”

This anecdote was doubted by journalist Thomas Vinciguerra who was knowledgeable on this topic. He compiled and published the collection “Backward Ran Sentences: The Best of Wolcott Gibbs from The New Yorker”. Vinciguerra said the following about Gibbs during an interview in 2011:[2]Website: The New Yorker, Interview title: Q. & A. Thomas Vinciguerra on Wolcott Gibbs, Interviewer name: Jon Michaud, Date on website: October 10, 2011, Website description: Essays, commentary, … Continue reading

I first heard of him at age twelve, when I came across him in “The Guinness Book of World Records.” The editors said that the world’s shortest piece of criticism had been “attributed” to him. Supposedly, in reviewing a farce called “Wham!” Gibbs wrote the single-word response “Ouch!” I thought the comment was hilarious, and that Gibbs’s name sounded owlish and prickly—both of which, I later discovered, he was. It didn’t even matter that the review turned out to be apocryphal.

Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.

Continue reading “Theatrical Show: “Wham!”; Review: “Ouch!””

References

References
↑1 1965 January 14, The Edmonton Journal, Else Rempel’s Edmonton Notebook: For What It’s Worth, Quote Page 6, Column 1, Edmonton, Alberta, Canada. (Newspapers_com)
↑2 Website: The New Yorker, Interview title: Q. & A. Thomas Vinciguerra on Wolcott Gibbs, Interviewer name: Jon Michaud, Date on website: October 10, 2011, Website description: Essays, commentary, fiction, and cartoons. (Accessed newyorker.com on February 4, 2022) link

Science Gathers Knowledge Faster Than Society Gathers Wisdom

Isaac Asimov? Michio Kaku? Apocryphal?

Dear Quote Investigator: Science has been extraordinarily successful in making impressive discoveries. Yet, humankind’s thoughtfulness and judgement have been severely tested by the new insights and capabilities that have emerged. A prominent science fiction author said:

Science gathers knowledge faster than society gathers wisdom.

Would you please help me to identify the author of this statement together with a citation?

Quote Investigator: In 1988 Isaac Asimov and Jason A. Shulman published “Isaac Asimov’s Book of Science and Nature Quotations”. The work contained 86 sections, and each began with a quotation from Asimov. The epigraph for the “Science and Society” section was the following. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:[1]1988, Isaac Asimov’s Book of Science and Nature Quotations, Edited by Isaac Asimov and Jason A. Shulman, Chapter 72: Science and Society, (Quotation appears as chapter epigraph), Quote Page … Continue reading

The saddest aspect of life right now is that science gathers knowledge faster than society gathers wisdom.
ISAAC ASIMOV

Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.

Continue reading “Science Gathers Knowledge Faster Than Society Gathers Wisdom”

References

References
↑1 1988, Isaac Asimov’s Book of Science and Nature Quotations, Edited by Isaac Asimov and Jason A. Shulman, Chapter 72: Science and Society, (Quotation appears as chapter epigraph), Quote Page 281, A Blue Cliff Editions Book: Weidenfeld & Nicolson, New York. (Verified with scans; Internet Archive)

Nobody Realizes That Some People Expend Tremendous Energy Merely To Be Normal

Albert Camus? Blanche Balain? Justin O’Brien? Herbert R. Lottman? Apocryphal?

Dear Quote Investigator: It is natural for a few aspects of each individual to be atypical or divergent. For many people extraordinary energy is needed simply to appear normal. The famous French philosopher Albert Camus apparently mentioned this in “The Myth of Sisyphus” or in one of his notebooks, but I am having trouble locating the original French statement. Would you please help me to find a citation?

Quote Investigator: Albert Camus maintained a series of notebooks to record his nascent ideas and aphorisms. He also transcribed statements he heard from others. After his death in 1960, material from the notebooks was edited and published in a series of books. Camus penned remarks into notebook number four between January 1942 and September 1945. He preserved the following comment from “B.B.”, actress and poet Blanche Balain. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:[1]1964, Carnets: janvier 1942 – mars 1951 (Notebooks: January 1942 – March 1951) by Albert Camus, Cahier IV (Notebook 4), Quote Page 105, Éditions Gallimard, Paris, France. (Verified with … Continue reading

B. B. « Personne ne se rend compte que certaines personnes dépensent une force herculéenne pour être seulement normales. »

Translator Justin O’Brien rendered notebook number four into English. Here is his version of the comment:[2]1965, Notebooks 1942-1951 by Albert Camus, Translated from the French by Justin O’Brien, Notebook 4, Date: Between June and August 1943, Quote Page 80, Alfred A. Knopf, New York. (Verified with … Continue reading

B.B.: “Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal.”

Albert Camus popularized this statement via his posthumous notebook, but he did not craft it. Blanche Balain should receive credit for this insight.

Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.

Continue reading “Nobody Realizes That Some People Expend Tremendous Energy Merely To Be Normal”

References

References
↑1 1964, Carnets: janvier 1942 – mars 1951 (Notebooks: January 1942 – March 1951) by Albert Camus, Cahier IV (Notebook 4), Quote Page 105, Éditions Gallimard, Paris, France. (Verified with scans)
↑2 1965, Notebooks 1942-1951 by Albert Camus, Translated from the French by Justin O’Brien, Notebook 4, Date: Between June and August 1943, Quote Page 80, Alfred A. Knopf, New York. (Verified with scans)

The Penalty of Success Is To Be Bored By the People Who Used To Snub You

Mary Wilson Little? Nancy Astor? Charley Jones? Cholly Knickerbocker? Earl Wilson? Junius? Anonymous?

Dear Quote Investigator: If one climbs the social ladder the result can be surprising. People who once snubbed you will allow you to enter their social circle. Yet, attending their gatherings often results in boredom. This observation has been attributed to the U.S. author Mary Wilson Little and the U.K. politician Nancy Astor. Would you please explore this topic?

Quote Investigator: The earliest evidence located by QI appeared in several newspapers in August 1880. The creator was initially anonymous. Mary Wilson Little claimed authorship in 1897. Over the decades the phrasing has evolved, and the ascription has shifted. Here is a sampling with dates:

1880 Aug 10: The penalty of success is to be bored by the attentions of people who used to snub you. (Anon)

1880 Aug 17: The penalty of success is to be bored by the attention of people who used to snub you. (Anon)

1881 May 12: The penalty of success is to be bored by people who used to snub you. (Anon)

1897: The penalty of success is to be bored by the attentions of people who formerly snubbed you. ( M. W. L. – Mary Wilson Little)

1913 Oct 07: One of the penalties of success is to be bored by the attentions of the people who used to snub you. (Anon)

1925 Oct 06: The penalty of success is to be bored by the attention of people who formally snubbed you. (Anon)

1941 Jan 29: The penalty of success is to be bored by the attentions of people who formerly snubbed you. (The Office Cat by Junius)

1949: The penalty of success is to be bored by the attentions of people who formerly snubbed you. (Attributed to Mary Wilson Little by Evan Esar)

1953 May 28: The penalty of success is to be bored by the people who used to snub you. (Attributed to Charley Jones by Earl Wilson)

1953 July 06: The penalty of success is to be bored by the people who used to snub you. (Attributed to Nancy Astor by Cholly Knickerbocker)

Below are selected citations in chronological order.

Continue reading “The Penalty of Success Is To Be Bored By the People Who Used To Snub You”

Success Is To Be Measured Not So Much By the Position That One Has Reached in Life As By the Obstacles Which He Has Overcome

Booker T. Washington? Apocryphal?

labyrinthDear Quote Investigator: The true measure of success in life is not determined solely by the position one attains. Instead, the measure must consider the obstacles one has overcome. The prominent educator and author Booker T. Washington said something like this. Would you please help me to find a citation?

Quote Investigator: Booker T. Washington published a series of autobiographical articles in the New York periodical “The Outlook”. The November 10, 1900 piece included the following. Boldface added to excerpts by QI:[1]1900 November 10, The Outlook, Volume 66, Number 11, Up from Slavery: An Autobiography by Booker T. Washington, Start Page 649, Quote Page 654, The Outlook Company, New York. (Google Books Full View) … Continue reading

I have learned that success is to be measured not so much by the position that one has reached in life as by the obstacles which he has overcome while trying to succeed.

Below are additional selected citations in chronological order.

Continue reading “Success Is To Be Measured Not So Much By the Position That One Has Reached in Life As By the Obstacles Which He Has Overcome”

References

References
↑1 1900 November 10, The Outlook, Volume 66, Number 11, Up from Slavery: An Autobiography by Booker T. Washington, Start Page 649, Quote Page 654, The Outlook Company, New York. (Google Books Full View) link